#the amount of lines is first set in a piece of code we were given and this works fine..

[bluerose5]

Honesty is Key

Pairing: Scott Ryder/Jaal Ama Darav

Rating: T

Word Count: 1,487

Tags: Mass Effect: Andromeda, Pre-Relationship, Slight Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Communication, Loyalty Mission, Post-Jaal Ama Darav: Flesh and Blood, Emotional Hurt and Comfort

Scott couldn't take it.

He had been so close to losing him. His stomach churned at the thought alone. His hands shook, yet no amount of deep breaths or calming thoughts helped soothe his nerves.

Adrenaline coursed through him, showing no sign of letting up.

Scott had barely stepped foot on the Tempest before he was already rushing off to the bathrooms in quick, long strides. The others called out to him, but he ignored them. Their words were garbled, unintelligible. It was like listening to someone from underwater.

Thankfully, no one was in the restroom.

Using the codes that Kallo had given him, he overrode the Tempest's protocols and locked the doors behind him. Bile started to rise in the back of his throat, leaving a bitter taste that lingered on the back of his tongue.

Taking his helmet off, Scott tossed it aside. It hit the floor and cracked, but he couldn't find it in himself to care right now.

He had been so close to losing him.

Both of his knees buckled, and Scott barely had enough time to brace himself against the sink before they collapsed entirely. Running shaky fingers through his hair, he glanced up and met his eyes in the mirror. They were red, swollen, and puffy. Tears had started to stream down his cheeks without Scott even noticing.

His face was as pale as a ghost, and his stomach continued to churn until finally he gagged.

All he could see was that bullet slicing through Jaal's cheek, over and over again. If the shot had been aimed slightly more to Akksul's right, then he—

Before Scott could even finish that thought, he was stumbling through the bathroom. He fell to his knees in front of the toilet, and his stomach heaved.

By the time his stomach was empty, his throat burned, and his vision blurred.

He couldn't stop trembling from head to toe, feeling as if he was coming apart at the seams.

"Pathfinder," SAM said through their private channel, "your vitals are consistent with those associated with extreme distress. Should I alert Dr. T'Perro?"

"I—" Scott managed to scrape himself off the floor, careful of the shards scattered around from his helmet's shattered facepiece. "No, I'll be fine."

Eventually.

Scott rinsed his mouth out at the sink, nose wrinkled in disgust.

Cleaning up as much as he could, Scott figured he could come back later and finish up.

Of course, the second he stepped out the door, he bumped into Jaal's chest.

Well, that dashed any hopes he had of making a quick escape to his quarters. Not that he should have expected any different. Jaal wasn't the type to avoid an issue when he could confront it instead.

At the sight of Scott's blotchy, tear-stained face, Jaal frowned.

"You are upset," he stated.

"Yeah, no shit."

It took Scott a whole minute to realize that he had said that aloud instead of keeping it to himself. Jaal blinked owlishly at him in shock, but Scott averted his gaze, sinking his teeth into his bottom lip.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, face flushed with warmth compared to mere moments prior.

Jaal regarded him in confusion.

"Why are you apologizing for speaking your mind?" he asked, utterly baffled.

Right. The angara value openness and honesty.

Scott could work with that.

Hopefully.

"Mind joining me in my quarters?" Scott asked, eyeing the empty corridor with suspicion. Knowing his crew, he might not have them in his direct line of sight at the moment, but that didn't mean that they weren't listening in somehow. Call him paranoid, but Scott wasn't taking any chances. "I want to talk about what just happened out there."

At that, Jaal shifted uncertainly, wringing his hands together.

"Okay," he whispered, "but are you certain that we have to have this discussion alone?"

Scott narrowed his eyes at him, arms crossed over his chest.

"I would prefer to be alone, yes."

"You're upset with me," Jaal noted, but was he right?

Yes, no, maybe. Scott didn't know, but he wasn't going to have this conversation out in the open.

"Come on," Scott grumbled, dragging Jaal into his quarters alongside him. Once they were inside, Scott sealed the doors. "In you go."

"Scott—"

"Not. A. Word." Jaal snapped his mouth shut, and Scott jabbed a finger into his chest. "You are so—" Reckless, stupid, careless... There was so much he wanted to say, but it was near impossible to settle on one word alone. "—infuriating!"

It was nowhere near enough, but it would have to do for the moment.

Without thinking, Scott kicked at a nearby box. He didn't notice until it was too late that his body was thrumming with biotic energy, his frame enveloped in a bluish light. He sent the box flying into a nearby wall, where it shattered into little pieces.

Scott watched it fall apart, but he didn't feel much satisfaction from the act. Instead, he felt numb. Numb and drained.

Turning back to Jaal, Scott let his biotics fizzle out.

His face crumpled.

"I could have lost you," Scott whispered distantly, his voice thick with exhaustion. "I almost lost you."

Repeating it didn't help any. Reality refused to set in entirely. He still struggled to comprehend everything that happened at the Forge.

In the blink of an eye, Jaal had Scott wrapped up in his arms. Scott choked on a sob, burying his face into the crook of Jaal's neck.

He took a deep breath, Jaal's sweet, warm scent a constant reminder that he was still there. That he was alive.

"I don't have many people left that I care about," Scott whispered, finally giving voice to those feelings that had been bottled up for so long. "My mom and dad are both gone. There's no telling when Sara will wake up." He swallowed thickly past the lump in his throat. "You and the crew... You're all that I have left. My friends, my family, my colleagues."

He pulled away, just enough to stare pointedly into Jaal's bright blue eyes.

"And so much more," he breathed.

Carefully, he traced his fingers along the underside of Jaal's latest wound. At first, he flinched, but Jaal grabbed Scott’s hand and held it there before he could pull away.

If anything, he leaned even further into his touch, and Scott melted.

"I'm sorry to make you worry so," Jaal said, "but I'm grateful that you trusted me enough to refrain from bringing harm to Akksul. I know that it had to be a difficult decision, but acting against him would have only strengthened the Roekaar's cause. You did the right thing."

"Perhaps," Scott grunted, "but that doesn't make me feel any less like shit."

Jaal chuckled.

Tightening his arms around him, his rofjinn draped over Scott’s shoulders like a warm blanket, safe and secure.

Scott snuggled in close.

"Doing the right thing won't always feel fulfilling," Jaal said, "but thank you. Not only for that."

Scott furrowed his brow.

"What else do you have to thank me for?"

Jaal beamed.

Truth be told, he had no right to look that happy, not when Scott was mad at him. Sort of.

"For being honest with me." He shrugged. "I've noticed that you've been opening up more and more lately, at least compared to when we first met. It means a lot."

"Well, uh..." Scott trailed off, clearing his throat. "No problem. My family were never really the touchy-feely types. It's definitely new territory for me."

"Yet you take to it so well. Even when you're enraged, you're radiant."

Scott sputtered, then unraveled himself from Jaal's embrace, keeping a hold on his hand.

"Alright, on that note, it's time to go."

As he pulled Jaal along, Jaal grumbled in protest.

"Hey!" They exited the room together. "Where are we going?"

"To have Lexi properly clean and disinfect your wound before I kiss you, and neither of us want that." Before Jaal could get too hurt by that statement, Scott clarified. "Not until I've showered and brushed my teeth, at least. I'm a mess."

"Oh!" Understanding dawned on Jaal, but he decided to take a risk. "And after that? Will you kiss me then?"

Of course, about half the crew decided then —of all times— to emerge from the Crew Quarters, all of them stopping short when they heard Jaal's exclamation.

They tossed Scott teasing glances.

"Yeah, Scott," Vetra called out, "when are you going to give Jaal a kiss?"

"It would be rude not to," Peebee said.

With his cheeks lit aflame, Scott gaped like a fish out of water, opening and closing his mouth as he struggled for words.

Why did he suddenly feel like it should be against the rules to bully the Pathfinder?!

Eventually, he said, "I should go."

And he hurried back to his quarters, tripping on his feet as their laughter chased him off.

[anagentinwriting]

Lifeline - Part 16

Summary: (First Responders!AU) Moving to Los Angeles and living with your brother, Thor, was never part of your plan nor was being a 9-1-1 dispatcher, but plans change when you are faced with your own emergencies. In your case, it was leaving behind a relationship that wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. Will this be the fresh start you were hoping for or will your past find a way to catch up with you?

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Odinson!Sister Reader

Word Count: 3600+

Warnings: Blood, angst, kidnapping, hospitals

Lifeline Masterlist / Main Masterlist

Thor whistled, clutching onto your Tupperware as he punched in the gate code to your condo, hearing a dog barking in the distance. “Dogs, such noisy creatures. This is why Darryl and I agreed to no dogs, but I will admit they can be adorable at times,” he mumbled to himself, pausing on the last digit, noticing the gate partially opened. “Huh? That can’t be right.” 

He pushed open the gate and stepped in, turning to close it until he heard it lock in place. He reassured himself with a nod and continued up the path to your house, hearing the barking get louder. Thor rubbed his lips together as his eyes traveled to the small porch, spotting a dark figure lying on the ground.

“What in the name is…” Thor's eyes widened, getting closer and recognizing the figure to be Steve. Thor dropped your Tupperware to the ground, sprinting to him, and kneeled down next to him. “STEVE, STEVE. HEY, HEY, WAKE UP?” 

The motion sensor lights flickered on, and Thor’s mouth dropped open, taking in Steve’s appearance. Steve was lying on his side in a small pool of blood. A gash on the side of his head glistened in the light with blood coating one side of his neck. Thor gulped, zipping off his sweatshirt, and pulling his phone from his pants pocket, dialing 911. 

“STEVE, STEVE...YOU THERE BUDDY? STAY WITH ME…” Thor shouted, placing his phone on speaker and setting it on the ground. He rotated Steve onto his back, placing two fingers on his neck to check for a pulse while applying slight pressure to his head wound using his sweatshirt.  

“911, what’s your emergency?” A male voice asked on the other side of the line.

“I need medical and police response to 761 High Ridge Drive Unit 1. We have an unconscious adult male suffering from some sort of head trauma.” Thor’s eyes traveled down Steve’s form, seeing a knife sticking out of his torso. “Scratch that, a head trauma and a stab wound to his torso.”

“May I ask who I am speaking with?”

“Thor Odinson. I’m a firefighter with the 107.”

“Wait, Thor…this is Bruce; is everything alright?”

“The victim is Steve Rogers. He is bleeding from both his head and his abdomen.”

“Units are on their way. Do you know what happened or how long he has been down?”

“I don’t know. I just came to drop my sister’s Tupperware off, and from the amount of blood, I would assume it hasn’t been long.”

“How’s his pulse?”

“It’s weak, and his breathing is shallow. Come on, Steve, wake up. Help is on the way.” Thor tapped him on the cheek, hearing a small groan leave his lips. “There you are. Good, good.” Thor let out a sharp, relieved breath, taking in his surroundings. His mouth went dry as he glanced over his shoulder at your front door, hearing a dog whining inside. “Steve, Steve, Where is YN? Is she still here?”

“YN,” he wheezed with his eyes closed. “Jig.”

Thor narrowed his eyes at him, not understanding what he was saying. “Jig? Steve, what are you saying? STEVE.” Thor tapped in on the cheek again but got nothing in response. He sighed, rechecking his pulse and nodding to himself when it was still there. “Hang on, Steve.”

“Responders are nearby,” Bruce stated through the phone. “Keep doing what you’re doing, Thor.”

Thor’s head snapped to the street upon hearing sirens, and the gate clicked open, having given Bruce the code earlier. Paramedics came rushing in, taking over his current position and examining him even farther. Thor stood off to the side, hearing nothing, but the sound of his own breathing, watching the medics work quickly. His mind was in a haze, and before he returned to his senses, Steve was on the stretcher going down the walkway. One of the paramedics was standing in front of him, staring at him with wide eyes. Her mouth was moving, but he couldn’t hear what she was saying.

“Are you going to be okay?” She asked again, placing her hand on his shoulder.

“Ahhh...yeah,” he nodded at her question. “Of course.”

“The police will be here shortly.” The paramedic patted him on the shoulder, handing him his phone before following her team.

“You still there, Thor?” Bruce asked as Thor watched the flashing lights disappear in the distance. 

“Yeahhhh,” he dragged out, bringing the phone to his ear. “YN.” 

He opened the door to your condo, and his stomach dropped at the carnage before him. The pillows and blankets that laid on the couch were scattered all around the living room. The small glass entry table Nat gave you was shattered to pieces along with what looked like a broken wine bottle. Photos hanging on the walls were no longer straight, and a few laid broken on the floor. 

He gulped, staring at what stood before him. “No, no, no,” he chanted to himself, racing up the stairs. “YN, YN, where are you?” He shouted, looking around your room and bathroom upstairs. He ran back down the stairs, stopping at the bottom. “YN,” he bleated, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Thor, did you find anything?” Bruce questioned from the phone in Thor’s hand.

“She’s uh….she’s not here. She’s gone,” he sniffled, squeezing his eyes shut. “All her stuff is here, but she’s gone.”

“All units responding to 761 High Ridge Drive, please be advised we also have a critical missing adult female: YN Odinson Russo.”

“He found her.” Thor’s voice dropped, making his body tensed up. Every nerve in his body felt like it was on fire, causing the hair on his arm to stand up straight. He let out a deep calming breath, but it did nothing to calm him down. 

“Hey, man. We’ll find her.”

“Bye, Bruce,” Thor grunted, hanging up the phone. He let out a frustrated sigh, running his hand through his hair. This wasn’t supposed to happen. How did he let this happen? He was supposed to protect you, but he failed you again. He promised you, and now, he broke that promise. He gave you to Billy without even giving you a chance, and Steve almost died in the process.

A noise behind him made his body jerk around in one swift motion with his hands raised, ready to throw a punch but dropped them once he heard it coming from the closet. He took a cautious step towards it and pulled it open, jumping back with his fists raised. He dropped them, seeing Cosmo whining and staring up at him. “What happened here boy?” 

Cosmo stepped out of the closet, and that’s when Thor’s eye caught the red marks around his mouth. “Did you bite him?” Cosmo whined, forcing a slight smile to Thor’s lips. “Did I call your kind noisy earlier; well, I meant amazing.��� Thor leaned down, scratching him on the head, staring at the stained fur around his mouth. Thor’s mouth spread into a closed-mouth smile with a single tear escaping down his cheek. 

___________

Thor watched the crime scene unit take pictures, seeing the flashes repeat themselves over and over again. He bit his lip, picturing Steve lying motionless on the ground as he tried to imagine a better outcome for you. Were you okay? Were you hurt? 

“Hey, big guy. How are you holding up?” Nat asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. He shrugged in response, not breaking eye contact with the front door. “Do you know what happened?”

He shook his head, catching her eye. “He did it, Nat. I know it was him; It was Billy.”

“Hey, we can’t assume it's him. For all, we know he is still in New York. We will figure this out as long as you let us do our jobs.”

“Are you kidding me?” He stood up straighter, pushing Nat’s hand away from him. “My sister, one of your best friends, goes missing, and you think some random asshole off the street came in, hit Steve over the head, and stabbed him, and then, what...for shits and giggles was like BLEUGH, let’s kidnap her. I mean, come on, who else would want to hurt her, Nat? Who?”

“You don’t think I know that. You don’t think I know what that asshole put her through. You don’t think I suspected it was him when the call came through because I did...and if you think you’re the only one hurting right now, you’re wrong,” She countered, poking him on the chest. Thor clenched his jaw, staring down at her to see tears threatening to fall in her eyes. “You need to trust us and let us do our job. The same way people put their trust in you to save their lives.” She pursed her lips, stepping away from him to go inside to look at the crime scene.”

“She’s right, man,” Clint added, standing off to the side. “Let us do our thing, and we’ll catch him.”

___________

Thor looked down at his watch, still standing in the same spot on the grass. He was supposed to be getting questioned but like everything else. They were taking their sweet time when they should be focusing on finding you.

“Hi, I’m Detective Nick Fury, and from what I understand, you're YN’s brother.” Thor tilted his head, sizing up the man with an eye patch, noticing Nat and Clint behind him. 

“Yes, how can I help?”

“From what my associates have filled me in on, they say you believe it was her ex-husband--” he flipped through his note pad “--Billy Russo. Yet, he lives some 3,000 miles away in New York City, so at this point, he isn’t guilty of anything.” He arched an eyebrow at Thor. “Did he know she was here?”

“Well… no, I don’t think so…but he did tell her if she ever left him, he would kill her.”

“Did YN tell you this?”

“Yes.”

“Did Russo threaten and/or hurt YN before this?”

“Yes.”

“She did file for divorce a day or so ago. It could have put her back on his radar.” Nat spoke up from behind him, and Fury nodded his head, writing a few notes in his notepad.

“We will look into him. Now, you mentioned to dispatch that before Rogers passed out, he mentioned someone by the name of Jig. Does that name sound familiar to you or you two behind me?” Nat and Clint both arched a bow, looking at each other, and mumbled no. 

“No, I don’t know him,” Thor answered, furrowing his brows together before his eyes shot open wide. “WAIT, Fury. I remember Steve mentioning this new friend he was playing pool with; I never met him, but now, I know why because it was Billy. He got close to Steve so he could get close to YN.” Fury stared at him, trying to wrap his head around it. “What, you don’t believe me? I mean...look at Steve’s phone. It’s right by the door; check for yourself.”

Fury sighed, looking at him. “It’s a good theory, but unfortunately, the phone is locked. We can’t open it without the victim's consent.”

“He’s in the hospital right now after almost dying. I think that gives you consent to look at any of his things as long as it pertains to finding my sister,” Thor shouted, standing up taller and pointing at the front door. 

“They will subpoena his phone records, but it’ll take time,” Nat added, crossing her arms. Thor shot her a hard glare, shaking his head with a vengeful smile.

“This is ridiculous. What if YN doesn’t have time? For all, we know she could be dead already because all of you are wasting time here instead of going out and looking for her. Come on, Billy did this.” Thor said, slapping his hand into his palm.  “It’s like every crime documentary I've watched; it’s always the husband, boyfriend, lover, or ex...” Thor rolled his eyes and started pacing back and forth. “He almost killed Steve, and he could--he could kill her next.” His voice drifted off, rubbing his forehead.

“But he didn’t…” Clint stated, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Maybe you’re right; Billy did this. He found out where she was and hurt Steve, but YN’s not here...and if all he wanted to do was kill her…”

“...then I would have found her, too,” he sniffled, clenching and unclenching his jaw. 

“And you didn’t.” Clint squeezed his shoulder. “She was alive when he took her, and we have to hold onto that right now.” Thor gulped, staring blankly at the front porch. 

“You’re right,” he breathed, staring down at Clint, nodding to Fury and Nat. “I should let you work. I’m gonna head to the hospital to see Steve...that is if we are done here?”

“We’re done for now,” Fury nodded, watching Thor go to his truck.

“You don’t think you’re gonna find her alive, do you?” Nat asked Fury, crossing her arms across her chest.

“In these situations, the most dangerous time for a woman is when she leaves her abuser. YN knew this, that’s why she was hiding, but if it is him…well, these scenarios usually don’t come with a happy ending.”

“Do we have any witnesses?” 

“None.” He shook his head. “At this time, we are still trying to access her security footage, but we did manage to get access to a street camera across the street. The image is a little grainy, but it did catch what looked to be a man forcing her into his car. All we got is a dark-colored sedan, which doesn’t exactly narrow down our search.”

“Nope, it just sounds like a bad guy's car,” Clint added, nodding his head. 

____________

Thor sat on one of the uncomfortable waiting room chairs, leaning his head against the wall. Steve was still in surgery, and by the looks of it, no one found you yet. Bucky and Val showed up a little while ago and were both in the corner talking with Carol, who got there first. Thor sat there quietly, staring at nothing with his blood ragging and fighting the urge to punch something. He leaned forward, hunching himself over rubbing his face with his hands. He sighed, removing his hands, spotting a pair of workbooks in front of him. His eyes traveled up to see Val standing in front of him. 

“Mind if I sit?” Thor pointed to the spot next to him and nodded with pursed lips. “I drew the short straw,” Val confessed, forcing him to scoff. “How are you doing?”

“I’m good, great even. The rage, vengeance, and anger coursing through my veins is nothing compared to what Billy is going to be feeling when I find that bastard.” He forced a smile, letting out a soft determined chuckle. Val placed a hand around his wrist, and he stared at her hand, feeling his invisible vail start to slip from his face. 

“Everyone is feeling that way right now, but how are you really?” 

He cleared his throat, glancing between Val and the floor, letting out a shaky breath. “I uh...I told YN that she didn’t need to keep running, that she should stay here and start over where she would be safe. I would keep her safe,” he sniffled, rubbing at his nose. “She had this dramatic plan all laid out, I was only her first stop, but then I convinced her to stay.  I promised her I would protect her and keep her out of harm's way.” He stared off into the distance. “But, he still found her, and I broke our promise. If she left like she planned to and she kept running, he never would’ve found her.”

Val sighed beside him, squeezing his wrist before letting go. “It’s not your fault. Yeah, sure, you might have promised her things, but I know YN wouldn’t want you blaming yourself. Hell, she would smack you upside the head if she knew what you were thinking.” She knocked her shoulder with his, and he smirked, nodding his head. “There is no telling what would've happened if she kept running. He might have caught up with her, he might not have, but if he did, she would’ve been alone and scared.”

“She’s alone with him…now” 

“But, I don’t think she is as scared as she would’ve been if it wasn’t for you being there and helping her through this.” Thor caught her eye as a stray tear fell down his cheek, but he quickly wiped it away, hoping it would go unnoticed.. “Dude, she was happy here, and I bet it was the happiest she's been in a long time.”

Thor was about to say something when his phone started ringing. He pulled it from his pocket, seeing Loki's name flashing on the screen. “It’s my brother; I better take this.” Thor stood up, answering it while he walked to a quiet hallway.

“What happened, brother?”

“Why would you assume something happened? I could’ve just called to see how you’ve been or asked about the movie you’re working on.”

“It’s a theatre production, not a film, but seriously brother, what’s the problem?” 

Thor walked back and forth in the hallway, not knowing what to say or how to say it. He breathed into the phone, leaning against the wall, staring up at the ceiling. He pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut. 

 “Say something?”

“What do you want me to say? That I messed up again. And our little sister is yet again in danger because of me. Or how one of my good friends is in the hospital, fighting for his life.”

“What? She’s gone? How did this happen?” Loki shouted into the phone, forcing Thor to remove it from his ear. “Thor. You had one job, just the one; keep our little sister safe. And you couldn’t even do it,” he snapped with an exasperated tone. 

“I did keep her safe. Sorry, I wasn’t coddling her like you did in New York. I, at least let her have a life, make friends, and have fun without me being…”

“I beg your pardon, we had fun here, and she has tons of friends here,” Loki interrupted.

“Well, at least I encouraged her to stay and start over instead of galavanting around like a chicken.”

“Why a chicken?”

“It’s a saying, I don’t remember the other half of it, but it’s not important. YN managed to find a new life, and she’s happy here.”

“I never said she wasn’t happy, and she wasn’t unhappy in New York either. It all comes back to the sleazebag she married.” 

“We finally agree on something,” Thor added with a knowing smile. “If only sister could see us now?”

"She isn’t to know about this.”

“She wouldn’t believe us anyway.”

“You have a point there.” Thor could picture Loki’s wicked smirk on his face. 

“When can you get here?”

“I’m leaving for the airport now. I’ll see you soon, brother.” Loki hung up, and Thor closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath.

Thor came back to the waiting room to find Nat and Clint there with their notepads out, probably asking them questions about Steve. He returned to the chair he was sitting in before, hunching himself over and twirling his phone around in his hand with his leg bouncing. He caught Nat’s eye, and he shot her a hard glare, shaking his head. She didn’t even care that one of her best friends was abducted; instead, she was more worried about her job and following orders; when did she decide to finally become a rule follower. Thor heard footsteps approach him, and he looked beside him to see Sam. 

“Hey man, I heard what happened. Sorry, I’m so late. I took an extra shift. Everything alright? Do you need anything?” Sam asked, taking the seat next to him.

“No news and I’m doing fine,” Thor gulped, leaning back and resting his hands together on his stomach.

“Any news on Steve?” Thor shook his head, staring straight ahead. “Do the police have any leads on YN?”

“None. As far as I am aware.” He shrugged, pointing to Nat and Clint. “They haven’t told me anything yet.”

Sam nodded, glancing between Thor and Nat, sensing something happened earlier. “How were Steve’s injuries? Was he still conscious?

“They seemed severe, but we’ve both seen worse. He had a gash on the side of his head, a knife sticking out of his torso. There was quite a bit of blood. He was unconscious, but he did manage to say YN and Jig before he passed out again. Never met him, so I don’t know if he has something to do with this. I have my theories, but the police aren’t looking into it. I told them to check his phone to see if Jig’s number matches her ex-husbands and that maybe he was lying about his name, but it’s breaking the chain of custody or some nonsense.” Thor crossed his arms, shaking his head.

“Wait, Steve said Jig,” Sam questioned, and Thor nodded, having explained this multiple times so far.  “You know I suspected him to be a little off when I met him at Happy’s. He seemed a little too full of himself with his hair gelled back, and his... “ 

“You’ve met him,” Thor asked, sitting up straight with wide eyes. “If I bring up a picture of him. Do you think you could recognize him?” Sam nodded, and Thor scrolled through his phone until he found a picture of you and Billy. “Is this him?”

“Yeah, that’s the guy. How did…” Sam’s eyes grew wide. “Oh, shit.”

“I knew it.” Thor shot out of his chair heading straight for Nat. 

____________

AN: Thanks for reading Part 16. Oh snap! How did this happen? Things were going so well, her and Steve were going to go on a date, but now she got kidnapped, Steve is in the hospital, and Cosmo got shoved into a closet. And just when Thor was starting to forgive himself for past events, this shit happens! And what is going on with Nat being a rule follower all the sudden? Interesting...And now, Loki is on his way to LA. (I never wrote him before, so I hope I did him justice!!) And for those of you that are 9-1-1 fans, it is similar to the kidnapping episode, you know the one. I like how they concocted it, so I worked off of that, but I did tweak it to my liking. As many suspected, Jig turned out to be Billy. It's a good thing Sam met him that night otherwise who knows how long it would've taken for them to realize. Also, I am curious if any of you Googled the name Jig with Marvel because I did, and he popped right up! Haha! Or did my subtle hints help you figure it out? Anyways, any theories as to what's to come? Will Thor ever be able to forgive himself? Is Steve gonna pull through? Are they going to find her in time? So many questions...I hope you all enjoyed Thor's POV in this part, I thought it would be a good change of pace. Anywho, my ramble is done, comments always welcome! Thanks again for reading! 

[wipbigbang]

2021 Schedule + FAQ

Schedule

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Sign-ups Begin- April 1st

Sign-ups Close- April 15th

Check In #1- April 22nd

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Rough Drafts Due- July 15th

Posting Claims Begin- July 23rd

Posting Claims Ends- August 1st

Final Drafts/Art Due- August 7th

Posting Starts- August 8th

FAQ

What is the WIP Big Bang? Good question! This is a Big Bang with one goal in mind: to clean out your drafts folder. These are stories that were unfinished for whatever reason, that authors returned to and completed, and the art that goes with them!

Do I need a Livejournal/Dreamwidth/AO3/etc. account to participate? No! You don’t have to have an account on anything to participate, though you will need to have somewhere to post your finished work. Having one or more accounts will help for you to follow what is going on with the bang (we crosspost to Livejournal, Dreamwidth, Tumblr, and Twitter at the moment), but they are not required to participate. You can always leave comments anonymously or with an opensource ID.

Will I get emails about the bang? We do send out some emails, mostly for snippets and art claims and to ensure communication between authors and artists, but please do NOT rely on getting an email to remind you of due dates. We currently do not keep an updated email list of participants, so we only send individual emails as needed rather than mass emails.

However, email is the fastest way to communicate with the mods. If you have any questions or are having trouble communicating with your artist/author, please do email us! We will do our best to respond quickly.

Is there a minimum word count? 7,500 words, but the sky's the limit, right?

What do you mean by minimum word count to enter? This is a WIP Big Bang, therefore we ask you to have at least 500 words of your story drafted when you enter. It's okay if you have posted a few chapters of your fic already (you never know when the muse deserts you, after all), we just require you to refrain from posting more until posting begins here.

Is there anything not allowed? As long as you wrote it and you want to finish it, you're welcome to participate. Just bear in mind that original work is only allowed on AO3 if it has a fannish connection and might make it hard for artists to work with. But we'll make a dedicated post for that if there will be any.

What are 'Check Ins’? These are a way for us to see what you've been up to and for you to make sure you're still on track. It will give you a little nudge/reminder if you need it, but they are not compulsory.

What are the snippets requirements? In order to allow the artists to make art for the story they claimed, we require you to supply three snippets from your fic, between 500 – 1500 words each. The snippets will be sent to the artist after they have claimed your story. They're to help the artist match your story for artwork the best way he or she possibly can. It’s helpful to choose scenes or parts of scenes that you feel best represent your fic, but don’t feel like they have to be perfect to be submitted. Along with the snippets, we will send your artist the basic fic info and your email, so the two of you can collaborate more if you would both like.

What are the rough drafts requirements? For the rough drafts, stories should be at least 80% complete. You will not have to turn them in to us, just assure us that you are at that point. Anything less is at the discretion of the mods and those authors should speak to one of the mods asap.

What is, and do I need, a beta? A beta is basically a person who goes over your work to make sure that there are no spelling/grammatical errors and they can even be of assistance in helping you with story lines, etc. It is highly recommended that a beta looks over your work before posting. If you are having trouble finding a beta, try this post.

Where can I post my fic/art? Stories and art can be posted to your own personal journal, tumblr, ff-net, AO3, or wherever you like. For those of you with AO3 accounts, we will set up a collection that will go live on the day of the posting. Also, we've enabled moderated posting to the comm (Livejournal and Dreamwidth) for members. We will post a template for posting artwork and stories to the comm closer to the posting date.

If you don’t currently have an AO3 account but would like one, you can contact the mods for an invitation code to see if they have any available. You can also add yourself to the AO3 Invites Request queue.

How do I know when to post? Posting will be tiered; you'll each get your own posting date that you and your artist will decide on together. There will probably be four fics, plus art, posting per day between August 8th and September 30th. The post with date claims will go up on July 23rd and you'll have to choose your date by August 1st.

If you want to post your story in chapters on AO3 or your own blog (or wherever you usually post), you may do so starting August 1st. However, posting has to be finished by your chosen posting date to the comm. One of the things we're hoping to do with the posted dates is to give everybody on the comm a little bragging time in the spotlight. You know, "this story was incomplete for this long, but I finished this sucker." If you don't have time to post on your chosen posting date, you can queue up a post ahead of time and we can post it on the date you picked. Either way works for us. Art will be due on the chosen posting date to the comm.

Is there a minimum/maximum requirement for my art? There is no strict minimum, but we do ask artists to remember that the authors are writing a minimum of 7,500 words and your artwork should reflect that. You can do anything you like, including banners, wallpapers, icons, mixes, vids, gif sets, picspams, etc. Suggested guidelines for art are 500x500px (or equivalent of smaller pieces like banner + spacers, cover + icons, etc.) for traditional art, digital art, and manips; 2 minutes for vids; 10 songs + cover art for mixes; and 6 images for gif sets and picspams. We also ask that when you are in contact with the author, you work with them to see if there is anything specific they would like (i.e. a wallpaper, book cover, etc.). The art is your work, but having ideas doesn't hurt!

What are 'art claims'? The claims are when anonymous summaries of the story go up for artists to choose from. It is based on a 'first come, first served' basis and artists may choose up to three potential stories (in case their first choice is unavailable). If there are more stories than artists, there will be a second round of claims wherein artists may choose a second story to work with. And on until all stories are claimed for art.

If a fic up for claiming is rated explicit (R, NC-17, etc.), please only claim the story if you are over 18 years of age. Some authors may be uncomfortable working with underage artists on explicit works. We do not verify ages in any way for the bang, so this is solely on the honor system.

Can I get an extension? Community extensions may be given in the event that the majority of the authors/artists need one. They may also be given individually under certain circumstances, but this must be discussed with the mods and will only be a short extension for posting. If you are certain that you won’t be able to finish your story in time, please let us know by June 13th.

What do I do if I have problems or concerns about my author/artist? Sometimes authors and artists do not get along and this may cause problems with working together. If this happens to be the case with you, please email the mods and we will try to do what we can so that everyone has a chance to have fun at WIP Big Bang!

If you have not heard from your author/artist in some time after trying to contact them, you can reach out to us via email and we will try to get in touch with them for you.

Can I drop out? We have high hopes that everybody who signs up can actually finish the round and share in the joy of the reveal with us, but real life can unfortunately get in the way and we completely understand! If you feel like you just cannot finish in time and no amount of assistance from us can help you, just let us know by July 13th (if at all possible).

Is it possible to be banned? We do have a banned users list. We hope to use this to encourage participants who are having issues to communicate with the mods. We want to help you! The way the ban works is that participants, either authors and artists, will be banned for dropping out without notifying a mod. This means that anyone who has not posted or talked to a mod by the time the posting period ends will be banned. Dropping out is not in and of itself a banning offense, so please do not panic if you have to drop out! We understand that there are many reasons you may need to drop, and we want to work with you.

Bans will last one round or until the issue is resolved, whichever comes first. To resolve a ban, authors will have to finish and post the story they signed up with and artists will have to finish and post the art for the story they claimed. Three bans will result in a permanent ban from the bang.</lj-cut>

I have a question/concern that’s not mentioned here. If you need help, you can always contact a mod and we will do our best to make sure that you get your story/art finished. The best and fastest method of contact is through our email, wipbigbang@gmail.com.

[runephoenix6769]

“What is with the Blake / Yang hate this week? Folks seem particularly fired up.” I asked this question on a forum because of something I’ve noticed the last few days on discussions about Blake and Yang/Bumbleby/shipping in general. I keep seeing the same answers.  “It ruins the team’s dynamic.”

Welp, I’m pretty certain none of those people would say that Raven/Tai and Tai/Summer ruined the team’s dynamic. Or that Ren and Nora are currently  ruining the team’s dynamic.  What is this holy than thou crusading to protect the sanctity of the team dynamic? Rwby has always been first and foremost about interpersonal relationships. It’s what drives the actual plot. Character growth, failing relationships/friendships. How they change over time, either to grow or crumble. 

“It’s being shoehorned in, for fanwank.” How? How is it being shoehorned in? Give me a narrative breakdown as to where/how/when this occurs? Compare it to the Sun/Blake narrative and show me the glaring differences between the Yang/Blake narrative to prove that bumbleby was never planned yet blacksun was?  (Sidenote. Anyone that has been asked to do this on the forum has yet to do it.)

“Yang showed interest in boys.”“ Yes, yes she passed comment once. In vol 1 episode 1. 8 VOLUMES AGO. She has shown not a lick of interest in guys since. Its almost as if she’s like any normal 17 year old girl who is growing into adulthood and figuring herself out, who might be realising her interest in Blake isn’t strictly platonic and is trying to navigate that whilst also grappling with what that means with regards to their friendship. And dealing with an over arching situation that is, ya know, potentially the end of the world as they know it.  It’s about two years in universe, right? Which is about right of an amount of time for what its happening between them to play out. It only feels like longer to the audience because, well, its taken 8/9 years to tell the story up until that point. 

“The Fans are too loud/vocal/come on too strong.” Ok, this one I agree with, we are loud and vocal and that might come across as coming on strong  (here’s a huge) BUT, there is actually a genuine explanation for why it seems that way.   If you really think about it, objectively. 

Hear me out.  Fans are excited about the potential representation we don't otherwise usually get in media. I mean, if you have 10,000 pieces of media and only ONE of them represents lgbtq people, of course we’re gonna be excited and talk about the ONE quite a bit with others who are like us. This might also be the first time we’ve seen anything like this, or seen ourselves represented in a somewhat positive light. It stands to reason that the other 9999 pieces aren't going to hold our attention as much, esp if its the same hetero romance played out a bajillion times before, right? I mean, if you have a group of people who are constantly represented in the 9999 other shows, their voices are going to spread thinner, right? They aren’t going to be gathered all on one place, talking about the same thing because there are 9999 other choices to connect them to other people. They aren’t going to care as much if their straight ship happens/doesnt happen 

“Hey, I can move onto another piece of media that is churned out by the status quo. No big deal.”

Hetero romances are ten a penny. Flick through netflix, hulu, crunchy roll etc.  Where as if you have a group of people who are only represented in ONE show out of the 10,000 those people are going to gather in one place to connect with others and its only going to seem like they are louder due to the densely packed space.  These same people have been majority silent about the other 9999 pieces of media as their voice isn't usually represented in a positive light - being queer characters are usually brutally murdered or sidelined. (Thankyou Hays Code.)- or not even represented at all. (Bury Your Gays is a trope for a reason, folks.) And we are NEVER the titular characters. We’ve been living on crumbs and subtext for decades! Not to mention showrunners who actively queerbait the hell out of us for ratings and viewership. The almighty Pink Pound as its often referred to in business. “But why do they have to make them gay?” You’re not made gay, you’re born gay. It just takes longer for some people to realise than others. It can be a gradual realisation. And this is quite possibly the case with Yang/Blake, slowly coming to realise their own burgeoning sexualities and attraction to each other.

”Why do they have to be gay?” They don't need a reason to be queer! They just are! Queerness is only a part of a person, not their everything. It’s actually quite refreshing to see Yang/Blake being portrayed as much more than their potential sexuality.  Ask yourself, ‘Why does a character have to be straight? And why doesn’t a straight character have to constantly reaffirm their sexuality? Why is ‘straightness’ assumed by default?’ Heteronormativity, is something that has been perpetuated by decades of media. (helped by the Hays Code with its out of date moral code. To be other is to be punished within the narrative.) That straight is the default setting. It’s not! We exist! Everywhere! We always have and we are going to talk to each other about it when we see a glimpse of ourselves represented in what has been a relative Sahara Desert when it comes to queer content were we are not villainised.   “The romance is detracting from the plot.” Two seconds ago, people were claiming that the romance was none existent. Which is it? But Nora and Ren’s romance that is being held up as a mirror to bumbleby is fine? That Jaune relentlessly pursuing Weiss was perfectly ok. Neptune openly hitting on female characters is fine. 

“I don’t have a problem with LGBT. I just don’t want it forced down my throat.” Again, out of 10,000 pieces of media, this is just ONE show. Nobody is forcing anyone to watch it or participate.  Queer people have had to stomach literal 100′s of years of straight media forced upon them. Since the very conception of the written word and narrative storytelling. In plays, theatre, art, music, tv, film, on billboards, advertising, in places of education and learning etc etc. Queer people are bombarded with it whilst also being surrounded by negativity towards queerness. 

“They are shoving it down my throat!” part two Is hand holding, compassion and expressing concern for another person and comforting them somehow offensive? Renora kissed, not a problem. Arkos kissed, not a problem. Show me in the sand where the line is drawn. What is the difference? Please explain this to me? Why is the expression of queerness somehow offensive? Is this because decades of media have perpetuated the false idea that all queer people are sex crazed perverts? That you’ve been groomed into thinking that queer sexuality is only based in the act of sex itself? That queer sexuality couldn’t possibly be similar to heterosexuality in its expression?

That it couldn’t possibly be about attraction, emotional, mental and maybe one day blossom into physical between two consenting adults, a pure expression of love the exact same as heterosexuality. 

That some how queer love stems from some sort of deviancy or mental health issue. That queer people are some how bad or evil, and therefore their expression of affection is wrong? Oh, I wonder where those beliefs have possibly stemmed from?  “Why are they in my face?” part three.  50% of of the titular cast are potentially queer. Blake and Yang. But if you look at the overall cast ensemble that runs at minimum 16 any given volume, that’s a measly 12.5% (prolly a lot smaller if you actually counted the whole cast that appears in rotation each volume) Also, someone did the math. Blake - a titular character- actually has less spoken lines that Jaune. ffs. B&Y spent neatly a whole two volumes of 8 apart. 25% of the narrative as it stands on entirely different continents. 

I fail to see how it being in someone’s face could be the case.

  “I just don't see it!”

That’s ok and perfectly valid But listen when people who have lived this experience are telling you that their experience is being portrayed on the screen. That they see themselves being represented.  OK, This completely got away from me. In conclusion. They are more straight people than queer people and media often reflects that.   We are usually the silent minority, we are sick of it but we are used to it and we are very excited that things seem to be finally changing.

It’s two characters in an large cast in ONE show out of 10,000. Its a piece of media that, for a change, hasn’t been 100% curated for straight people.  We are often not allowed to play in the sand box and if we are, we’re told to play with the broken toys, be grateful and quiet. So when we are given a sandbox to play in with new unbroken toys, we are gonna dog pile in there and make a ruckas, calling our friends over. What I’m trying to say is, it’s gonna get rowdy.  and here’s something to think about.  “When you are used to privilege, equality feels like deprivation.”  

[nightshade-minho]

3021: Starless

-(4)-

Warnings: presence of knives and weapons, android blood. explicit smut: master kink, spanking, rough facefucking, unprotected sex, degradation, light bunny kink, nipple play, creampie, voyeurism (i think? idk hyunjin is listening in on everything-), biting, a punch.

Wc: 6.4k

The alarm forced you awake, and you rolled over in your bed with a groan as you slammed the button violently, the incessant wailing finally stopping. With a sigh, your tired brain tried to remember why you'd set an alarm this early.

Oh. Right. You had a date.

You sat up with a smile on your face, stretching before going over to your closet and wondering what to wear. A part of you really wanted to impress Minho. Finally, you settled on a cute dress you rarely wore. Pulling it on, you looked in the mirror and nodded to yourself in approval. Not bad...

As you finished getting ready, you hovered near your trusty knives on the bedside table. You weren't going to need them on a date...and it wasn't like you could hide them in your dress, either. You shook your head and left them there, going to the living room.

Hyunjin was lying on the couch, his gaze fixed on the netscreen. As he noticed you walk in, he hurriedly switched it off, putting a smile on his face. Frowning, you went over to grab your keys, his shifty behaviour making you suspicious.

"Um, is there anything I should know?"

"What? Nothing! Absolutely nothing." He eyed you up and down, wolf-whistling under his breath. "Damn, who'd you dress up for?"

"That's none of your business. I'll be back later. Again-"

"Don't answer the door for strangers. Got it. I'll be careful. I'm not a toddler, Y/n."

You rolled your eyes as you opened the front door. "Could have had me fooled. Also...I'm tired of you walking around shirtless. I'll get Jisung to bring you some clothes."

Hyunjin smirked, placing his cheek in his palm. "Why, angel? Does it affect you?"

Deciding not to grace him with an answer, you left the apartment, locking it behind you, his chuckle the last thing you hear as you leave.

Minho's eyes lit up as you walked towards him from across the street, your footsteps lazy as you crossed the road.

"Hey there. You look really pretty." He smiled. You looked around, humming. You were downtown, on a long street lined with hawkers and stalls selling everything from netscreens to steaming hot dumplings. It wasn't exactly your first choice for a date night, but it could be fun. It was also very close to your home, so if an emergency were to happen, you'd be able to dash back...

"Thank you. So...what have you got planned?"

"Well, I've always found places like this interesting. Every person here probably has a different story..." he sighed as he looked around the crowd, before dragging his gaze back to you. "I just thought we could take a walk, reach the end of the street. Maybe browse some stalls. What do you think? Cause there's a nice restaurant nearby, so if you don't like it then...." He chewed on his bottom lip, worried that you thought his idea was lame.

"No, this sounds fun. Let's do it." You shrugged. His relieved grin made your heart flutter as he hesitantly took your hand, leading you down the street.

Jisung knocked on the door, clutching the bag in his hands tightly as he waited for Hyunjin to open up. You’d called him and told him to bring Hyunjin ‘some clothes’. Hearing your voice again had made him realize just how much he’d missed you, despite only being away for one night.

When Hyunjin finally opened the door, Jisung lifted an eyebrow as he noted his bare chest, and the tight sweatpants which he remembered seeing you wear on more than one occasion. Could you have...no. Slightly uncomfortable, he ignored the android’s cocky smirk as he pushed past, heading for the couch and dropping the bag there.

“Here are some clothes that hopefully fit you.” He wrinkled his nose, trying to avert his eyes from the scantily clad android. “So...you don’t have to walk around looking like that.”

Hyunjin hummed, taking a banana from the fruit bowl and handing it to Jisung as he sifted through the clothes. “Thank you.” He said simply.

Jisung regarded the banana with disdain, dropping it on the table as he looked around. “Do you...do you know where Y/n went?”

Hyunjin picked up the nervous edge to Jisung’s voice. Hmm.

“I don’t know, she didn’t say. But...my guess is she was going on a date. She dressed up real cute.” He shrugged, grabbing Jisung’s discarded banana and peeling it.

“A...a date?” Jisung swallowed, hating the mass of jealousy clogging his throat. “Y/n never dresses up...”

“Hm.” Hyunjin bit into the banana, talking with his mouth full. “When’s the last time you took a shower, dude?”

Jisung fought the urge to snap, his patience wearing thin. ‘I’m a mechanic, pretty boy. This is what I do for a living.” He wiped off the grease on his chin, looking up. ‘Did I get it?”

Hyunjin tilted his head in amusement. “Uh huh.”

Jisung glared, pausing as his neodisk’s alarm set off. Shit, he had to be back at the workshop in 15 minutes. He had really wanted to ask Hyunjin some questions, though. Why was he hiding from the palace? And how long was he expecting to do it?

“Bye.” Jisung mumbled under his breath, heading for the door. He didn’t know if it was jealousy or an actual fear of being found out...but he needed Hyunjin out of your apartment, as soon as possible.

"Those are fake, right?" You noted, your eyes falling on a stall lined with numerous neodisks and netscreens. "There's no way those are authentic, especially when they only cost that much." You said firmly.

"They most probably are." He shrugged, as you continued walking down the street.

So far, the date was going very well. Minho was funny, good at conversation, and he seemed to care about you a lot. This was the most fun you'd had in ages.

It was nice not having to be riddled with worries and burdens. For once in your life, someone else was taking the lead. It felt liberating.

The two of you had already consumed a fair amount of dumplings as well as managed to piss off every other person in the Sound Sensitivity stall, when your neodisk's extremely loud ringtone sliced through the silence, causing you to stumble and knock over an entire shelf of deflectors. Needless to say, the two of you were now banned from that particular stall.

You regretted pushing him away, wishing you'd given him the chance to show this side of him before.

"Oh look!" Your eyes suddenly focused an array of jewelry, laid across the table, most of the pieces looking suspiciously authentic.

"That looks interesting. Wait, look at those..." He said slowly, pulling you to the stall and running his finger over the item that had caught his eye right away.

You peered around him, letting out a small gasp as you saw what he was looking at.

There were a pair of beautiful, delicate rings lying on the table. Wow. You found yourself wondering about the history behind them. They seemed to be really ancient.

Minho took one in his hand, inspecting it as he turned it around. "Wow. This looks like a real ruby...if it's fake, then it's very well made."

"Are they wedding rings?" You noticed in awe as he handed the other, more petite one to you. Turning it over, you made a small sound of appreciation.

Unable to control the temptation, you slid the ring down your finger, raising your hand to look at it. It was so beautiful...

"Do you really like it?"

"I do..."

"Then buy it."

"I didn't bring any crescents with me." You sigh, moving to take the ring off. "It's okay-"

"No! Just...wait. Let me find out how much it costs, okay?" He quickly stepped into the stall before you could protest. You sighed, continuing to look through the rest of the jewelry as Minho found the shop owner, sitting at the back in a chair. He noticed her blinker, realizing she was an android. Fuck, she wouldn't be easy to bargain with.

"How much are these?" He asked, raising up the ring.

The woman paused, squinting at it before nodding. "If you want the pair, 1021 crescents."

Minho groaned inwardly. He didn't want to let you down...but if you knew he bought something that expensive for you on the first date, you would probably be weirded out. It's not like you knew how rich he was.

Sighing, Minho nodded. "Okay, I'll buy them." The lady nodded, handing him the crescent processor. He punched in his code, the woman taking the device back as it let out a tiny ping.

"All yours." She said, turning around and going back to her chair. Minho bowed gratefully before heading out again.

He walked over to you, smiling. "I got them."

"Oh, how much were they??"

Shit.

"Um, only 15 crescents."

You hummed in approval, smiling as he slid his ring on as well. "Wow, that's less than I expected for rings this intricate, but I guess this place isn't a certified jewelry store or anything. It makes sense."

"Yeah." He swallowed. He didn't like lying to you, even if it was just a tiny white lie...but he'd gotten used to lying. The smile on your face as you looked at him was enough, though. He watched you observe the glinting ring on your finger, swallowing. Maybe he should tell you those were real, and not a cheap knock-off...but no, you might think it's weird and return it. He definitely didn’t want that. Something about you wearing the ring he bought for you was making his heart thud impossibly fast.

His smile grew wider as you grabbed his hand again, tugging gently. "I'm hungry." You pouted.

"Didn't we just eat, princess?"

"Well yeah, but we didn't have dessert..." You mumbled, looking up. He smiled at you, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

"Okay, let's go get something sweet. Like what, though?"

You looked around, your eyes falling on an ice cream truck right across you, letting out a sound of happiness in the process. Minho followed your gaze, smiling as he saw the stall.

"Do you want ice-cream, hm, baby?" He teased. You nodded, flashing him doe eyes as he tried to maintain his control, your innocent expression affecting him in a way he couldn't quite describe.

The two of you made your way to the stall.

After a lot of thought, you decided on a pinkberry popsicle. Minho chose not to have one, claiming he didn't have much of a sweet tooth.

You walked down the street, swinging Minho's hand lightly as you licked and sucked on your popsicle with fervor. It'd been so long since you had ice cream of any sort, choosing to ration your crescents to buy what really mattered. Humming under your breath, you glanced up at him, only to find his gaze burning into you, his expression having changed.

Minho tried to ignore the heat rushing south as you swirled your tongue around the tip of the popsicle, seemingly oblivious to the effect you were having on him. But no, you’d noticed.

You averted your eyes from him, his heavy stare causing your insides to twist. You tried your best to consume the ice-cream in a less...provocative manner, but it wasn't as easy as it sounds.

Eh, fuck it. You might as well have some fun with it.

You licked a stripe up the base of the popsicle to the top, sucking on it as you looked up at him, winking.

When his eyes darkened considerably, you knew you'd been playing a dangerous game. Minho kept his eyes firmly locked on the street in front of him, his hand tight around yours as he chose to ignore you.

You sighed under your breath at your failure to rile him up, choosing to finish your ice-cream silently as the crowd started thinning out, the two of you nearing the end of the street.

The road was now quiet, and the absence of the bustling noise you'd grown accustomed to around these parts made the atmosphere even more intense. You carefully avoided eye contact with Minho as you discarded the naked popsicle stick into a waiting trashmachine, not wanting to see his expression.

"You really seemed to be enjoying that ice-cream." He said lowly, his tone sparking something carnal in your lower half. God.

To tell the truth, you weren't big on sex. The only passion you'd ever harboured was toward your knives...So the deep arousal settling itself in your core was surprising, to say the least.

What did you have to lose?

"I was. It was delicious." You mumbled, leaning in closer to him and working up your courage.

"I'd rather taste something else, though."

Minho swore under his breath at your boldness. That was it, he couldn't hold himself back anymore. Grabbing your wrist, he pulled you into an empty alley, pushing you up against the wall as his eyes bore into yours.

"Naughty kitten. I didn't expect this from you." He mumbled almost to himself, his finger coming up to tilt your chin higher, forcing you to look into his eyes.

"I like the bold ones, though." He whispered in your ear. His proximity was blindingly intoxicating, and you let out a small whimper when you felt his lips brush against the shell of your ear.

Minho's eyebrow raised. "What was that?" He let out a drawn out chuckle. "I barely did anything, kitten. Why are you already so riled up?

"I'm not."

His finger brushed across your cheek as he cupped it gently, his lips forming into a mock pout. "Your face is redder than a tomato...I guess I finally managed to fluster you. Yay me." He mumbled, his eyes on your lips.

"I never get f-flustered. Especially not by you."

Minho paused, his smirk growing wider as he noticed the way you couldn't quite look at his face, the slight tremble of your lip as you uttered the lie.

"Sure, whatever you say." Minho leaned in until his bottom lip brushed against yours. He found himself relishing the blown out innocence in your expression. For once, you didn't look completely self assured, confident you know what happens next. The light helplessness he had thrust you into was turning him on even more.

Your lips parted as you stared up at him, too shy to make the first move.

Inhaling, Minho let out a soft sigh. His breath tickled your chin as he finally molded his lips with yours, gently.

Your eyes blew wide as his admittedly soft mouth moved against yours, slowly drifting closed as you kissed him back. He tasted so sweet...

Minho's hands snaked behind you, gripping the backs of your thighs as he lifted you up, slotting himself between your legs.

"I've been wanting to do this for such a long time..." he mumbled against your lips, teeth pulling on your bottom lip as he stared into your eyes.

You held onto him tightly, wrapping your legs around his waist and pressing your lips back to his, parting yours. The two of you made out, each swipe of his tongue drawing out a moan from you, making you want more.

He broke away after a few minutes, breathing heavily as he rested his forehead against yours.

"You-"

You were interrupted as he rolled his hips into yours out of nowhere, the thick bulge in his pants rubbing against your clothed folds. Letting out a choked moan, you whined softly, bucking your hips as your mind begged for more.

"Patience, kitten."

"I'm p-patient."

He raised an eyebrow, one hand sliding up your dress to cup your breast, his thumb running over your covered nipple and drawing out another whimper from you.

"Really? Doesn't seem like it."

"Please-"

"Please, what?"

"Please make me f-feel good." You managed to get out, looking up at him with pleading eyes and making him swear as he let go of you, setting you on the ground again as he pulled you out of the alley, his grip on your wrist firm as he walked to your apartment as fast as he could.

Fuck, it hurt. But it had to be done. Hyunjin stared at the bloody tracker in the sink. Setting the knife down, he breathed out slowly.

Smashing it with his fist, he made sure it was destroyed before tossing it into your trash can and sighing. He used his elbow to wipe the drops of blue on the counter. Shit, he was going to need a shower after this.

No matter what, one thing was for sure. He couldn’t let them find him.

Never.

As the two of you got closer to your apartment, your addled brain suddenly remembered the fact that you were hiding the royal android in your apartment- and here you were, bringing someone who worked for the government right to him. Damn it, all the making out had made you forget.

You stopped in your tracks right in front of your front door, Minho turning to you with a raised eyebrow at your hesitation.

"Open the door, Y/n."

"I...um..." you tried to gather your thoughts together. You couldn't send him away now. Fuck. You were already in too deep, and you'd be lying if you said you didn't need him inside you right away.

"I...um, my room is really messy. Uh, just let me go in and clean it a bit-"

Minho let out a low growl, trapping you against your door as he leaned in. "I don't give a shit about your room, kitten. I just want to fuck you until you're dumb and begging me for more."

You looked up at him, mouth opening slightly as you tried to think of what to say, his words effectively rendering you mute.

"P-please?" You managed to get out, pouting up at him. Minho's expression softened slightly, and he stepped back slowly with a sigh. "Fine. Go ahead." He leaned against the wall, raising an eyebrow at you. "Be quick. I don't want to stay out in this hallway with a boner any longer than I have to."

You smiled gratefully, quickly unlocking your door and shutting it behind you as you went into your apartment. Swearing under your breath, you quickly searched your tiny apartment, unable to find Hyunjin. Your heart started beating faster as you wondered where the tall android could have possibly gone.

Finally, you found him in your bathroom.

Naked.

"What the f- Hyunjin! I thought I told Jisung to get you clothes-"

"He did. I can't take a shower clothed, though, right?" Hyunjin smirked, clutching your towel in his fingers as he glanced up at your red cheeks.

"You look worked up."

"It's not because of you." You hissed, and the man scoffed. "Whatever you say, princess."

Your eyes widened as you heard your front door open, cursing.

Fuck this. You really didn't have time for this bullshit.

"Stay. Quiet." You snapped quietly, ignoring Hyunjin's confused expression as you quickly darted out of the bathroom, locking the door from the outside as you leaned against it, trying to seem nonchalant.

Minho walked in, his eyes falling on your messy bed as he pulled his shirt off, making you gulp at the sight of his chiselled torso.

"Well, you didn't really do a good job of cleaning, did you?" He laughed. "It's okay, I don't blame you."

He came over to you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear as he tilted your chin up. "I'm going to ruin this pretty face of yours." He mumbled, pressing his lips to yours again as you whimpered against him. He groaned, his hands roughly kneading the flesh of your ass as he deepened the kiss even further.

He bit your lip again, his hand coming down to your thigh to lift it higher, his bulge gaining better access to your heat. "Fuck, I can feel how wet you are. Tell me, baby. How do you want me?"

You whined, the words stuck in your throat. You were acutely aware of Hyunjin's presence in the bathroom, and the fact that he was overhearing all of this.

Minho's hand suddenly came down on your rear, a sharp smack that snapped you out of your thoughts, making you yelp. "Answer my question." He growled.

All your hesitation melted away in that moment. You were too far gone.

"I w-want you, Master."

Minho's eyes widened a little at the title, swallowing as he noted your embarrassed expression at what had slipped out. He felt himself get harder, his pants constricting him uncomfortably.

A smirk grew on his face as he picked you up, kissing you as he sat down on your bed with you on his lap. “Good girl.”

You grinded down on him, moaning softly at the feeling of his erection. "M-master, I wanna taste you..."

He looked up at you, nodding. "Whatever you want, kitten. Get master's cock all wet, hm?"

You slithered down, unzipping his pants hastily. Consumed with the need to feel him, you pulled down his briefs as quickly as you could, the sight of his cock drawing out a groan from you.

Long and pink, a bead of pre-cum rested on its tip. Unable to control yourself, you leaned in and swiped your tongue over it, humming at the taste.

Minho threw his head back, the view of your soft lips wrapping around the head of his cock making him feel drunk on an emotion he never knew existed. On instinct, his fingers curled in your hair, making you take him even deeper.

You tried to focus on your breathing as Minho's cock hit the back of your throat, pulling on your hair roughly as he started fucking into you. "That's right." He hissed. "Little slut. Take this fucking cock-"

He grunted, reaching down to pull on your top, exposing more of your cleavage to him. Scared he was going to rip your dress, you reached behind you to unzip it.

Minho let you pull off his cock for a second, helping you slide the offending material off. As soon as you managed to get the dress on the floor, his hold on your hair was back, shoving you all the way down on his cock once more.

The lack of oxygen was making you lightheaded, as Minho resumed his almost cruelly rough thrusts. You loved it, though. The heat between your thighs was demanding your attention, but you just couldn't bring yourself to pull away yet. Just a little more...fuck, his groans above you sounded so heavenly. You wished you could hear them everyday.

Minho finally seemed to take some mercy on you, his grip on your hair tightening as he slid his cock out of your mouth slowly, inch by inch.

"Pretty." He mumbled, his thumb running over your lip, slick with his juices. You let out a mewl, wanting him to ruin you already. You wanted to be fucked stupid, like he said. Wanted to be his helpless little doll.

It scared you, how much you were willing to give away all your power to this man. Throw away any semblance of control, just to not be able to make decisions for once, for someone else to take care of you for a change.

Minho pulled you onto his lap, playing with the waistband of your panties as he gazed into your eyes. "I'm going to have my way with you, sweetheart." He said, pulling your panties off with a sudden, almost eerie calmness. ‘And you’re going to take it all like a good slut, hm?”

Minho's hands on your hips guided you over his cock, and your breath hitched as you feel his tip pressing against the velvet of your folds, his eyes falling on your chest. ‘Y-yes, Master.”

Minho's lips latched around your clothed nipple, nibbling on it gently as he pulled your other breast out of its cup, toying with the bud.

"Master..."

"Hm?" His eyes shot up to yours, and you're shocked at how different they look. Dark, filled with irate lust and an apparent need to claim you.

"I need you."

"Beg for it."

You swallowed, hesitation filling you. You looked up at the ceiling as your brain reminded you for a second about the asshole in the other room who was most likely having a field day eavesdropping. He was probably really enjoying it. You wouldn't put it past him.

The image of his dick, that you'd accidentally stolen a glance of, suddenly flashed in your head, turning you redder. It was beautiful...almost weirdly so. Inhumanely perfect. Obviously, it was manufactured to be, but that didn't mean you weren't going to-

Minho's squeeze on your ass cheek brought you back to the present, confusion filling you as you looked back down at the man, his head tilted as he glared at you.

Why the fuck were you thinking about that pain in the ass, when you had this god of a human underneath you? Honestly, Y/n, get it together.

“I told you to beg.”

You felt your uncertainty melt away as you inhaled, the neediness making a reappearance.

"Want my p-pussy destroyed. Want master to fill me up. Make me his." You said softly, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He buried his nose in your neck, humming in content. "Good girl. My good girl." He mumbled against your skin, lining his cock up with your entrance, pumping himself as he did so.

You let out a strangled moan as you felt him push his rigid length into you slowly, your walls hugging him tightly as you tried to adjust to the feeling. "F-fuck-"

"It feels good, doesn't it?" He said, tone a little softer compared to before. You nodded desperately as his hands found your waist, moving you and forcing you to take more of his cock, until you were sitting on him, him entirely inside of you.

Was sex always supposed to feel this good? It was almost euphoric, how good his length felt, stretching your pussy to its absolute limit. The pleasure shot through you, filling you up completely. Using your waist as leverage, he slowly started fucking up into you. Slow at first, and then his thrusts turned more animalistic, stretching your ass cheeks to take you deeper.

"It feels a-amazing, Master." You were finding it hard to speak incoherently, the sounds of skin slapping skin filling the room as you descended into a flurry of whines, as he bit your boobs, his lips kissing everything he could reach.

His mouth found yours again eventually, his lips parting yours as he pulled you close to him, your bodies sweaty and pressed together.

“Shit...”

Minho growled into the kiss, flipping you around and hovering over you as he lifted one leg over his shoulder, the new angle enabling him to hit your sweet spot accurately. The sight of your pussy twitching around his cock, stretching to accommodate all of him, was pushing him closer to the edge. You were perfect. So fucking perfect.

Minho had imagined having sex with you before. He'd never imagined it would be this heavenly, though. You were a completely different person now, the snark having disappeared completely. There were small whimpers falling out of your mouth, rather than the sarcastic comebacks he'd gotten used to hearing.

"My cute little slut. My bunny. Fuck." He snarled at the feeling of you clenching around him, his words driving you closer and closer to your orgasm. "You like this? Being a little whore for your master?"

You nodded in desperation, eyes rolling to the back of your head as he drove his cock into you like he was possessed. And he was, his emotions blurring as he felt you tilt your head back.

Minho bent down over you, hurriedly removing your bra and throwing it on the floor. He needed to see all of you. Running his hands over your boobs, he bit your neck, running his tongue over the marks he was making.

"I...I'm going to cum-" You cried out, raking your nails down his back as you squirmed. He held you down, your expression pushing him impossibly closer to his high. Minho frowned as he felt his heart pound. Even when he was inside you, he somehow wanted to get even closer to you. Groaning, he reached for your hand, intertwining your fingers with his. The metal of the ring he’d got you brushed against his skin, making his heartbeat accelerate.

For a second, he wondered why you were even letting him fuck you. Was this going to be a one time thing? Or did you really like him?

Did you want to be with him?

Minho opened his mouth, a groan leaving him as he looked at the spot where you two were connected. "Y/n..."

You looked up at him, quivering as you felt your orgasm overtaking you, hitting you full force. Waves of pleasure crashed through you as you tried to listen to Minho, your brain a mushy mess as your orgasm forced you to forget how to breathe.

"Y/n, I love..." Minho frowned, trailing off as he continued thrusting. No...fuck, he was too scared.

"...your pussy. Taking me in so well. Cum all over Master, there you go..." Feeling the sparks of pleasure in his abdomen build, Minho rutted into your limp body, desperately chasing his high. Maybe some other time.

"M-master...want your cum, please..." you whispered into his ear, unable to take the overstimulation for any longer. You felt him pounding into your sensitive pussy, the sensation overwhelming you.

"Fuck, take it then, bunny-" Minho growled, slamming into you as he came. You whimpered, feeling him paint you white. The stars behind your eyes faded slowly as you blinked, Minho's face a blur above you.

He rode out his high, collapsing gently on top of you, his head in the crook of your neck, leaving a kiss on the sensitive skin. Panting heavily, Minho lifted himself up, his eyes running over your naked body as he pulled out.

"You're beautiful." He mumbled, thumb stroking your wet cheek. You smiled weakly, sitting up a little. Minho followed your gaze to your pussy, his cum dribbling out from between your folds and forming a small pool on the mattress.

"Hm, we need to get you all cleaned up." He stood up. "Do you want to take a shower?"

You almost nodded, but then you suddenly remembered. Fuck.

"N-no! I...I'm tired. Cuddles?" You held your hands out to him, pouting as innocently as you could. Minho shook his head, grinning as he grabbed his shirt from the floor, pulling it on.

"Fine, just tell me where you keep the towels, then." He said, heading towards the door of your bathroom. Oh god.

You jumped up on your wobbly legs, stumbling a little as you went over to him and grabbed his hand, stopping him. He looked at you, an eyebrow raised at your weird behaviour. You opened your mouth, wondering what to say.

A sudden sharp ring cut through the silence, coming from his discarded pants on the floor. You let go of Minho as he crouched down to pull his neodisk out of his pocket, frowning at the screen.

Oh no. 

"Shit. Uh....Y/n, I've got to go." He looked at you in concern, clutching the device in his hand as he sighed, barely concealing his frustration. "Will you be okay?"

You tried to conceal your curiosity, knowing this would be to your advantage. No longer having to come up with an excuse, you nodded quickly, answering affirmatively. "Yeah. I'll be okay."

Minho quickly pulled his pants on as your eyes surreptitiously glanced at the bathroom door. You thanked whoever was up there for the distraction, watching as Minho clothed himself hurriedly.

Glancing back at you, Minho bit his lip. He really didn't want to leave you like this. He wanted to hold you close, wanted to kiss your face and tell you what a good girl you'd been for him. But he was helpless.

He needed one more kiss, though. Now that he'd tasted your soft lips, he wasn't sure he could stop himself from wanting to kiss you all the time. You'd always been intoxicating, but now you were even more so.

Walking to you, he grabbed your cheeks, staring into your eyes, his own straying down to your lips. Leaning in, he kissed you, soft and sweet.

"See you tomorrow, baby." He mumbled against your lips, giving you a half-hearted smile before turning around to leave. You sighed as he left, your heart cursing Hyunjin.

As soon as the door closed behind him, you twisted around, pulling on your clothes and walking quickly over to your bathroom. Your hand paused on the handle, as you felt the embarrassment bubbling up again. Whatever. Suck it up, Y/n.

You still craved Minho, wanted him to wrap you in his strong arms and make you feel safe. Shaking your head, you reminded yourself to snap back to the present. There was nothing you could do.

Hyunjin raised his head as you opened the door, his infuriating smirk still on display. And he was still fucking naked. 

“Well, you seemed like you were having fun out there.”

“I was.” You snapped, shaking your head. “Did...did you really hear everything?”

Hyunjin stood up, walking close to you. Again, too close. He seemed to like invading your personal bubble.

“M-master, I n-need you~” He mocked, making his voice high-pitched in an attempt to mock you. Your glare grew icier. He shrugged, voice back to normal. “But you still sounded really hot. I bet I could make you feel even better, though. Make you moan louder.” His tone dropped deeper on that last sentence, making you swallow as you stepped away.

“Fuck off.” You muttered, trying to not show your expression on your face. “Now get out. I need a shower.”

He smiled. “A-”

“If the next sentence out of your mouth is a suggestion to join me, no thanks.” You grumbled. He chuckled at that, shaking his head as he eyed your limp with contempt.

“No, I was just asking if you were hungry. I have a million different recipes embedded in my memory, and I wanted to try and cook today. You know, as a thank you for letting me stay.”

You paused, turning your head and sighing. “Well, I’m not that hungry...but sure, go ahead.”

He smiled, bowing. “You won’t be disappointed, princess.”

You grimaced as he left, stripping naked once more as you stepped into the shower, not wanting to think about the possible feelings you had for Minho or Hyunjin and his annoyingly stressful presence in your house. You really had to ask him what he was planning on doing sometime soon. How long would this be going on?

Minho knocked carefully on the door to his father’s study, his heart pounding.

“Come in.”

He swallowed slowly, shoving the door open. His father was sat at his desk, his table piled with documents.

“You needed me?” He asked, voice quiet.

“You were supposed to hand out the Phantoms’ equipment today.”

Fuck. “I...well, I handed it over to Mr. Kim. He said he would-”

“Minho.” He turned around, rubbing his forehead, his face filled with exasperation. “Minho. You had one job. Oversee the Phantom processes. You’re the supervisor. You were supposed to be there, son.”

Minho let out a shaky exhale, looking down at his feet. “I know. I’m sorry, I’ll do better next time.” He promised.

“You better. Or I won’t pay heed to the fact that you’re my son. Now tell me, what was so important that you had to ditch official government business?”

Minho didn’t know what to say. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. Fiddling with the ring on his finger nervously, he tried to come up with an excuse. But it was useless.

“That’s what I thought. Good night.” His father dismissed him with a disappointed sigh, turning back to his work. And that was that.

Minho left for his bedroom, blinking back tears of frustration as he climbed onto his bed. Taking the ring and his earrings off, he stripped to his underwear, burying his face in his pillow. He let his thoughts drift to you again, like they usually did this time of night. Usually he'd just be slipping into reveries and imagining you as his. Except this time, there was the tiniest bit of hope that you liked him back. He still couldn’t believe he’d kissed you. Fucked you.

He fell asleep with a smile on his face, despite it all. He really did love you, and he was willing to take his father's wrath over and over again if it meant he could keep you in his life.

Hyunjin let out a groan as soon as you close your bathroom door, rushing over to the sink as he felt his body burn up again. He didn’t know what was happening. He’d dug out the tracker in his wrist a while ago, but the overheating still hadn’t ceased.

Advanced android. Hyunjin let out a bitter chuckle. If only they knew. If only they fucking knew what the ‘royal android’ actually was.

He opened the fridge, the cool air calming him down. Ahh, that was much better. He let out a satisfied hum after a few minutes, feeling cooler. 

He turned around, wanting to make his way to your room to apologize for his earlier behaviour. It hadn't been his intention to flirt with you endlessly, to the point of annoyance. But now that he'd started, he found it hard to stop.

His mind replayed your moans and whimpers from before. He'd been telling the truth back then. Although he liked playing off his flirting as jovial, there was a small part of him that definitely meant every word. You were a beautiful woman after all, how could he not be attracted to you?

Consumed in his thoughts, he almost didn't see it coming. The punch to his face was sudden and powerful.

The force of it was strong, and so searingly painful he screwed his eyes shut as he gave out, slowly rocking back and forth before crashing onto the floor. Flickering lights, and a robotic whirr...the shock barely had enough time to sink in as he desperately tried to make sense of what his eyes were seeing.

Before he could, everything went black.

[swan-of-sunrise]

Taking Care of Business (Chapter Eight)

Summary: Din, (Y/N) and their passengers are trapped on a frozen planet and must quickly repair the Razor Crest if they have any hope of surviving.

Pairing: Din Djarin X Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings/Disclaimers: None

A/N: I hope you all enjoy!

Chapter Eight The Ship (Previous Chapter)

Jolting awake, Din pushed himself off the ship’s dashboard and groaned; the last thing he remembered before being knocked unconscious was the ship falling through the ice that he’d landed on. He was still disoriented when he glanced down at his armor and noticed the thin layer of frost coating the beskar. He reached up and flipped several switches but before he could determine just how much damage the ship had sustained, a small whimper behind him made him quickly turn around; the Frog woman was curled up on the floor of the cockpit, violently shivering as her arms wrapped around herself to generate warmth. He knelt down and helped her back into her seat as she began to quickly croak at him and gesture towards the cockpit door. Her eggs, he suddenly remembered, they were in the cargo hold when we crashed…

“I’ll find your eggs, don’t worry,” Din promised her. “Gotta get you some blankets, keep you warm…” He hurried out the cockpit doors and jumped down into the cargo hold; there was a gaping hole in the side of the hull, through which snow and freezing-cold air was blowing, and different wires and cables hung limp from the ceiling. Storage containers were strewn across the whole floor, all covered in frost, and he found himself muttering a quiet “Damn it.”

It was then that he remembered the child and his partner, and he hurriedly opened his sleeping compartment only to see the child’s hammock empty. Fear clenched at his heart as he turned back to the cluttered floor. “Kid? (Y/N)?” The Frog woman’s frantic croaking echoed down and Din called up, “Hang on, I’m looking for your eggs!” He carefully began stepping through the mess and, after hearing a small noise, bent down and threw a tarp to the side to reveal the child, an egg in his hands as he stood before the open container. “No!” He quickly closed the lid and picked up the container of eggs to examine it. It was the second time he’d caught the child eating eggs, and he was worried that the passenger would eventually notice their absences. “I told you not to do that.” The Frog woman spoke out to him again and he answered. “Found them!”

“M-Mando?”

Eyes widening, Din set the container down inside the sleeping compartment and locked it before hurrying over to where the captain’s weak voice had come from. “Dank farrik!”

(Y/N) was at the end of the cargo hold, hidden behind a storage container with her left arm pinned underneath another one, and her lips were nearly blue from the cold. “I tried…I tried moving it, but-”

“It’s okay, alor’ad, I’ve got it.” Careful not to jostle her arm, he lifted the container and set it down behind him, his heart dropping in his chest when he realized that her shoulder was bent at an unnatural angle and that she was shivering uncontrollably. “Osik…I’m gonna help you up now, okay? I need to push that shoulder back into its socket as quick as possible and I’ve gotta get you warm…” He leaned down and wrapped an arm around her waist, helping her stand before walking her over to another storage container. “Just sit here for a second, I’m gonna bring the Frog lady down here…”

Once he helped the Frog woman down the ladder and returned her eggs to her, he handed her a blanket and hurriedly fastened another over the hole in the hull in an attempt to begin warming the space. Then, he fixed (Y/N)’s dislocated shoulder and used the spare bandages from the med pack to bind her arm into a makeshift sling; she stifled her cry of pain behind her free hand and squeezed her eyes shut, but not before Din spotted the tears in her eyes. He knew first-hand how painful that kind of injury could be, so he didn’t judge his partner for what others would perceive as weakness. Once he was finished tending to her wound, he carefully wrapped a blanket around her and went to dig his spare heater out of the wreckage, turning it on and urging his companions to sit near it as he prepared a little dinner for them. (Y/N) quietly accepted her tray of food, her smile polite but her eyes betraying her anger towards him; suppressing a sigh of frustration, he turned away from her to glance at the Frog woman.

“If you hadn’t guessed, we’re in a tight spot; the main power drive’s not responding and the hull has lost its integrity. I suspect the temperature will drop significantly when night falls, and I’ll have a better idea of our prospects at that time.” He lowered himself onto the floor and leaned against the wall, making himself as comfortable as he could given the circumstances. The Frog woman began croaking urgently at him, gesturing to eggs while she did, and Din hopelessly answered, “I’m sorry, lady, I don’t understand Frog. Whatever it is, it can wait until morning.” He looked over at (Y/N), who was picking half-heartedly at her tray of food, and continued. “I recommend you both get some sleep.”

The captain didn’t acknowledge his words but when he crossed his arms and glanced back down, he noticed the child waddle his way over and cuddle against his side beneath his cape. Well, at least there’s one person who’s not angry with me, Din thought dejectedly to himself; (Y/N) was right, he shouldn’t have run from the New Republic rangers, but he’d panicked. He didn’t want to put any of them in danger, but that’s exactly what had happened anyway.

Before he fell asleep, Din watched as (Y/N) quietly set down her food and stood, removing the blanket from around her shoulders and placing it on top of the Frog woman’s eggs before settling down on the floor opposite him and wrapping her uninjured arm around herself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Wake up, Mandalorian.”

Din quickly jolted awake as the all-too familiar voice rang through the cargo hold, his blaster in his hand before he could fully register what he was looking at. Zero, the droid pilot from the prison breakout job, was still in pieces and secured to the wall of the ship, but a wire was now attached to its head and its opposite end was being held by the Frog woman; when she croaked again, Zero’s voice emitted from the head. “This cannot wait until morning. Do not be alarmed, I bypassed the droid’s security protocols and accessed its vocabulator.”

As (Y/N) and the child began to stir, Din holstered his blaster with more force than necessary. “What the hell are you doing? That droid is a killer.”

“These eggs are the last brood of my life cycle.” The Frog woman explained, resting a hand on her egg container sitting beside her. “My husband has risked his life to carve out an existence for us on the only planet that is hospitable to our species. We fought too hard and suffered too much to resign ourselves to the extinction of our family line. I must demand that you hold true to the deal that you agreed to.”

“Look, lady, the deal is off,” He growled in frustration, gesturing at the wreckage around them. “We’re lucky if we get off this frozen tomb with our lives!”

The Frog woman was unperturbed. “I thought honoring one’s word was a part of the Mandalorian code. I guess those are just stories for children.”

Across from him, (Y/N) visibly flinched at her words and the child looked up at him with near-pleading eyes; Din finally capitulated, easing the child off his lap before clambering to his feet, grabbing his toolkit and storming outside to assess the ship’s damages. The ship was in a bad shape but as he continued to examine it, he determined that it could thankfully still fly, albeit with a fair amount of patches and repairs. He was busy rewiring some of the broken cables near the engine when (Y/N) slowly approached him, a look of apprehension on her face as she knelt on the snow beside him.

“It’s, um…it looks a lot worse than it is. If the repairs go well, we can be out of here as soon as tomorrow.”

(Y/N) nodded. “Good, good. I…well, on the off-chance that we don’t, I just…I wanted to apologize for using your Creed against you when we first met.” His brow rose in surprise at her words; out of all the things he’d been expecting her to say, that certainly hadn’t been one of them. “It wasn’t fair of me to throw it in your face to get what I wanted, and I’m sorry.”

Din was at a loss for words; almost from the moment he swore the Creed, people had ridiculed his way of life and would often try using it against him to gain an upper hand on him. It had bothered him at first but he’d eventually grown used to the jabs and insults, learning to ignore or shrug them off. (Y/N) was the first person he’d ever met who bothered to apologize to him for her words.

Seeing her begin to rise, he shook himself out of his astonishment and grabbed her wrist to halt her; she looked at him with widened eyes, and he cleared his throat before speaking. “Thank you. I’m sorry as well. I shouldn’t have run from those rangers, and I apologize for not listening to your warnings.” His partner’s usual cheery smile brightened her face at his words and Din blushed beneath his helmet, quickly turning back towards the ship and gesturing at the hole in the hull. “You should get some rest, alor’ad. Your shoulder-”

“Feels perfectly fine, Mando. I can still help you with…” She trailed off, looking past him and furrowing her brow in confusion. “I think the little guy’s trying to tell us something.”

Looking in the same direction she was, Din’s eyes fell on the child, who was babbling and pointing at something on the other side of the ship. With a sigh of exasperation, he called over to him. “How about you come over here and give us a hand? Make yourself useful.” Instead of waddling over to them, the child walked behind the ship and out of sight. “Hey, kid!” He exchanged a look with (Y/N) and they both got to their feet, hurrying off after him. “I said, hey! Where are you going?”

“Come back here, little guy!” (Y/N) added; they turned the corner and made their way over to where the child had stopped.

Din knelt down beside him, instantly noticing the fresh footsteps in the snow. “When did she go?” According to his helmet’s thermal scan, it hadn’t been that long. With a small sigh, he picked up the child and stood. “It’s not safe for her to be out there alone. C’mon, let’s go.”

They slowly made their way through the icy caverns, careful not to make too much noise as they followed the Frog woman’s footsteps. Beside him, (Y/N) had drawn her blaster and was holding it in her good hand while Din kept a tight hold on the curious child in the crook of his arm. They turned a corner and found themselves standing within a massive cave; icicles the size of mudhorns hung from the ceiling and strange-looking objects rested all along the snow.

The familiar sounds of croaking caught Din’s attention and he looked over to see the Frog woman sitting in a glowing hot spring, with all her eggs floating at the top of the steaming water. “There you are,” He exhaled in relief, hurrying over to the hot spring with (Y/N) close behind him. “You can’t leave the ship, it’s not safe out here.” He set the child down at the edge of the water and knelt. “Let’s gather these up…”

Their passenger made a sound of protest as he began carefully putting her eggs back in her container; while he worked, he noticed (Y/N) sit down by the edge of the spring and give the Frog woman a sympathetic smile. “I know that it’s cold, but night’s coming fast and we can’t protect you out here; in the morning, Mando and I are gonna start working on repairs and we’ll be off this planet in no time. When we get back to the ship, I’ll look through my clothes for anything that’ll keep you and your eggs warm, okay?”

Because of the stunt she’d pulled earlier with the decapitated droid, Din knew that the Frog woman had understood the captain’s soothing words and with a nod of her head, she began helping him gather up the floating eggs. He glanced over at (Y/N) and couldn’t help but take note of how the faint glow from the hot spring illuminated her features; without thinking, he blurted out, “You’re good at that. Talking to people, I mean, making them feel comfortable. I just usually tend to scare them off and-No! No.” Din scolded the child, who’d taken advantage of his distraction and tried reaching for an egg. The child, looking a little more than miffed, walked away and he continued placing eggs into the container.

“Well, you haven’t managed to scare me off.” (Y/N) remarked, the corner of her mouth curving into a teasing smile. “You must be slipping, Mando; I thought that bounty hunters, even former ones, were supposed to terrify everybody they come across.”

Just as Din was about to indulge in their usual playful banter, the child’s cry echoed throughout the cave and his head whipped around in alarm; the child was running as fast as he could towards them, fear evident in his large eyes, and it didn’t take long for Din to realize why. The strange-looking objects that were strewn across the snow were beginning to shudder and hatch, and pale spiders of differing sizes began to emerge.

Quickly standing, he hurried over to where the child was and picked him up before backing away from the hatching creatures. His eyes widened in panic as more and more eggs began to break open, covering the floor of the cave with an ever-growing crowd of spiders. While he closed the lid of the egg container and slung it over his shoulder, the Frog woman hastily threw on her clothes and (Y/N) ushered her out of the hot spring; an echoing growl made the three of them look up and Din’s jaw dropped when an enormous spider, easily the size of his ship, crawled out of a deeper part of the cave.

“Go, go, go! Back to the ship!”

All three of them sprinted out of the cave and into the maze of icy tunnels, closely pursued by the swarm of spiders. While they ran, (Y/N) aimed her blaster and began shooting at the spiders behind them and Din, seeing spiders beginning to appear in front of them, drew his blaster and fired. A tunnel beside them was quickly blocked off when the massive spider shot a web at its entrance, so they quickly hurried down another; the Frog woman leapt past both Din and (Y/N), who were forced to holster their blasters so they could run faster from the advancing spiders. Although he couldn’t see it, he could hear the largest spider pursuing them from above, the impact of its legs shaking the frozen ceiling of the tunnel. A sharp cracking noise above alerted him to danger and his free hand shot out to haul the Frog woman back just as the spider’s long leg broke through the ceiling and was pulled up.

“Take her and get back to the ship, I’ll buy you some time!” Din yelled to (Y/N) as they ran.

The captain frantically shook her head. “No, I’m not leaving you behind!”

Thinking fast, Din pulled out three bombs and threw two of them on either side of the tunnel, then threw the third at the ceiling where the largest spider was. The bombs exploded, causing the tunnel to cave in on itself and he turned to watch the creature’s lifeless body crash to the ground before running after (Y/N) and the Frog woman. His partner had drawn her blaster again and was shooting at anything that moved; Din quickly did the same but once it became apparent that there were too many spiders to shoot and kill, he holstered his blaster and pushed (Y/N) and the Frog woman behind him before igniting the flamethrower on his vambrace.

White-hot flames shot out towards the swarm of spiders and instantly burned them to a crisp, but as the three of them continued to run, even more of the creatures began pursuing them. The broken-down ship finally came into view as he and (Y/N) continued firing their blasters at the spiders, and Din silently prayed that they’d be able to get the ship into the air in time to escape the swarm.

“Cover me!”

(Y/N) continued shooting spider after spider while Din turned and handed both the child and the egg container over to the Frog woman; he’d just ushered their passenger into the ship when the captain let out a cry of alarm, and he turned to see that her good arm had been webbed to the side of the ship. A smaller spider leapt towards them and on instinct, Din caught it in his fist and crushed it before throwing it aside; seeing the spiders inching closer to them, he helped (Y/N) wrench her arm free before pushing her into the ship and following after her. He continued blasting at the spiders as they followed them into the ship, scrambling up the ladder and shooting at the creatures as they emerged from the hole.

Seeing that his efforts were useless, Din stepped into the cockpit and tried closing its doors but the influx of spiders kept them from closing all the way. Desperate, he began shooting at the spiders through the crack in the door and (Y/N) quickly did the same, firing at the spiders that were lower down. The child’s fearful cry rang out over the sounds of their blasters firing and Din looked over just in time to see the Frog woman shoot at several small spiders that had been attacking him with a small blaster; their gazes met and he hurriedly nodded in thanks before turning and using his flamethrower to take care of the rest of the creatures. The door finally closed, but the danger hadn’t yet passed; the spiders had begun crawling over the outside of the ship.

“Strap yourselves in!” Din dropped down into the pilot’s seat, pressing buttons and flipping several switches; his hands flew over the various controls as he prepared the ship for take-off, and they were soon joined by (Y/N)’s good hand. They shared a brief glance before resuming their work, and he muttered under his breath to her, “This better work.”

“From your mouth to the Maker’s ears,” The captain replied, reaching over him to press a final button and letting out a sigh of relief as the ship shuddered to life. “We’re good to go!”

“I’ve got limited visibility, so it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.” He called out as they both pulled on the ship’s main lever; after a long moment, the engines began firing and the ship began to slowly rise. It continued to rise and as spiders began dropping off of it, (Y/N) glanced over at him with a hopeful grin that he couldn’t help but match underneath his helmet.

Their happiness was, predictably, short-lived. Something large and heavy landed on the top of the ship, slamming it back down into the ground; the force of the crash sent (Y/N) toppling onto his lap and while she struggled to right herself, Din watched through the ship’s viewport as the enormous spider he’d assumed had died prepared to pierce its leg into the cockpit. Quick as a flash, he wrapped his arms around his partner and pulled her closer to him just as its leg slammed into the space where her head had just been. Another leg slammed into the cockpit before being pulled out; all four of them watched in dread as the massive creature peered at them through the viewport. Somewhere behind him, the child whimpered in fear and he felt (Y/N) tense in his lap as the spider suddenly latched its mouth onto the viewport above them.

Its attack was stopped by an onslaught of blaster bolts and moments later, part of the spider’s carcass slid off the front of the ship. The sounds of blasters firing continued, illuminating the cockpit with red-tinted flashes; with her eyes widened in shock, (Y/N) turned to him and shakily asked, “Who the hell could that be?”

“I don’t know, but let’s find out.” He loosened his hold on the captain and let her stand before getting up; he made sure that the Frog woman and the child were unharmed before drawing his blaster and cautiously making his way down into the cargo hold. The entire space was covered in sticky spider webs and spider carcasses, and he was quick to shoot at one that was still crawling; with a brief glance at (Y/N), the two of them raised their blasters and slowly emerged from the ship to see their saviors.

“Son of a mud-scuffer, you’ve gotta be kidding me…” Din breathed out, watching as the two New Republic rangers sat atop their X-Wings and expertly shot down spider after spider that was still on the ship.

They soon stopped and watched as the two of them stepped forward, and the man on the right called out, “We ran the tabs on the Razor Crest. You have an arrest warrant for the abduction of Prisoner X-Six-Nine-Eleven.” Din kept his eyes on the two rangers but he could sense that (Y/N) was shooting him a look. “However, onboard security records show that you apprehended three priority culprits from the Wanted Register. Security records also show that you put your own life in harm’s way to protect that of Lieutenant Davan from the New Republic Correctional Corps. Is that true?”

“Am I under arrest?”

“Technically, you should be, but these are trying times.” The man glanced over at (Y/N), who had already holstered her blaster. “We also ran the credentials that you gave us, Captain (Y/N) (Y/L/N) of the Alliance Starfleet. According to your service record, you saved the lives of thousands of civilians during your years of service to the Rebellion; the New Republic owes you a great debt of gratitude.”

Clearing her throat, (Y/N) replied, “Thank you, Ranger.”

“Let’s say I forgo the bounties on those three criminals…” Din interjected, realizing that his partner was uncomfortable talking about her service record. “Can you two help me fuse my hull so I can get off this frozen rock?”

“Let’s say you fix that transponder, and we don’t vaporize that antique the next time we patrol the Rim?”

Fair enough, Din thought to himself as they watched the two X-Wings take off. They made their way back into the ship, where the Frog woman and the child were waiting for them. “All right, we’re gonna repair the cockpit enough for us to limp to Trask. There’s nothing I can do about the main hull’s integrity, so we’re gonna have to get cozy in the cockpit.” His words brought back the memory of (Y/N) sitting in his lap and he was thankful that his helmet could mask his growing blush. “It’s the only thing I can pressurize. If you need to use the privy, do it now. It’s gonna be a long ride.”

With (Y/N)’s aid, the repairs were quickly completed and he said another silent prayer as he sat down in the pilot’s seat; the Frog woman was already strapped into her seat, her canister of eggs resting in her lap. (Y/N) dropped down into her own seat with an exhausted sigh and rested her feet on her storage container; since they couldn’t fix the main hull’s integrity, she insisted on moving her things into the cockpit to keep them safe.

“Okay, the repairs are all done,” Din informed the Frog woman, holding the child in his lap as he pressed the final buttons. “Let’s see if we can get this thing going once and for all.” He slowly pulled on the ship’s main lever and the ship shook itself to life; they continued to rise and in no time, they were leaving the frozen planet’s upper atmosphere. He breathed out a sigh of relief before turning to look at (Y/N). “Wake me up if someone shoots us, or if that door gets sucked off its rails.”

(Y/N) bit back a smile at his bad joke, but the sounds of the Frog woman’s concerned croak made the captain quickly look over at her and shake her head. “It’s okay, ma’am, that’s not gonna happen…”

“I’m kidding. If that happened we’d all be dead,” He continued, watching in amusement as the captain threw him an exasperated look and continued to reassure their passenger. “Sweet dreams.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

A/N: Thank you guys so much for reading!

Mando'a Translations: Alor'ad-Captain Osik-Shit

Chapter Nine

Taking Care of Business Masterlist

Tagging: @remmysbounty​ @sinon36​ @seninjakitey​ @thatonedindjarinfan​ @ginger-swag-rapunzel​ @mostclevermiss​ @momc95​ @welcometothepedroverse​ @sarahjkl82-blog​ @zukoyonce​ @itsnottilly​

[neokad]

Phantasy Star II - The 1989 JRPG that could

(This post is dedicated to @kuukigajan, my best friend, whom motivated me to post here again, so... I hope you'll enjoy this!)

This game. This freaking game.

I'm gonna say it right now: this post will contain massive spoilers about pretty much everything in Phantasy Star 2's story, so if you do plan on experiencing this game fresh, I strongly advise you to not read this post at all beyond the first paragraph, but... here's the gist of it: Phantasy Star II is one of the most important and groundbreaking JRPGs of its time, and I just did not believe this game was from 1989, at ALL. For that and a few other reasons, it has become one of my new favourite games of all time <3 

In fact, I do want to start with the one big flaw of this adventure so that I can just gush about everything else that's brilliant about PSII. I have to be honest: the dungeon design in this game is horrible. Now to be fair, it does make the many places you visit more memorable, but well... there's a rumor floating around that an actual trainee made the layouts for the dungeons - and since this game was a bit rushed for the Genesis's launch, the devs just didn't have time to replace the... stuff he submitted. And let me tell you, this rumor makes sense: PSII's dungeons are too big, too maze-like, too confusing and also FILLED with strong enemies. And in a game where you don't get a way to save anywhere until the midway point, it can make your adventure very frustrating and potentially grindy because of that... Now I wouldn't say that PSII's nearly as bad in this area as say, the original version of Dragon Warrior or ironically the first Phantasy Star, but the dungeons can totally make you feel like the game's harder than it actually is, at least without a map.

Thankfully, you should never feel bad for using any maps or guides with this game! The execs at SEGA at the time made the very smart decision to include a walkthrough with each copy of the game, including maps, tips, secrets and more! Said guide does encourage youto not look at it as much as possible but... it's totally fair to just use this, without any shame!

And that is a great thing, because... with you armed with this piece of paper, Phantasy Star II can finally show you its actual brilliance.

The game's plot starts off a thousand years after the events of the first Phantasy Star game. Since Alis and her party defeated Dark Force, the inhabitants of the Algol solar system - and its three planets of Palma, Motavia and Dezolis - have enjoyed relative peace. However, at a (to my knowledge) unknown point in time, a computer entity known as Mother Brain has started imposing itself onto mostly Motavia. This, over time, has actually given many benefits to the region: the once deserted wasteland was given rain, water and crops, so that it could finally host viable, comfortable civilizations. The citizens that lived here could finally ditch their (arguably) nomadic, harsh lives in favor of comfort, pleasant weather and more. And most importantly, Mother Brain allowed its citizens, save for a few, to ditch their current jobs and live a life of laziness, without any obligations or pressure to do anything other than well, existence. This is reflected many times during the game through NPC dialogue, too!

It is on such a setting that our protagonist, Rolf, wakes up from a strange nightmare. In it, we see Alis batting Dark Force and struggling in doing so, but as soon as he realizes this, Rolf wakes up in cold sweat. He then proceeds to calm his nerves, realizing that no such dramatic events could possible happen to him - after all, he and many others have been under the universal protection and care of Mother Brain, whom at this point, has provided all of their needs for centuries. He then gets out of bed and goes to the central tower, where we works as an agent in case some things do go wrong.

And gone wrong things have! His superior informs him that biological monsters, which had been created and bred in the Mota biosystems laboratory, have gone rogue and infected the regions of Motavia at a rapid rate. Because of this, Rolf is asked to investigate the cause of this phenomenon. Once he gets home to prepare for his journey, he is ambushed by best girl Nei, who has been rescued by him many months ago from the clutches of a serial killer. She does not want to be left alone anymore, and since she is also worried for Rolf's sefety, asks him to accompany him on the mission. Naturally, Rolf accepts.

Here, I do want to bring up Nei in more detail! She's in fact, the first of PSII's brilliant story-gameplay interactions, and here's why! Nei is in fact, a crossbreed experiment between a human and an unknown animal with cat-like features, but here's the thing: this said experiment was a failure. Because of this, Nei is only one years old, and yet her physical and mental age are progressing way more rapidly than they should. And you can feel this effect on the game itself: she needs way less EXP than any other party member in the game to level up, and because of this she will skyrocket in levels way beyond the rest of your crew... with a catch. Because of the nature of the experiment, the genetic code inside of her is slowly being messed up and corrupted, which not only causes her level ups to be less valuable than anyone else's, but it also becomes an important plot point later...  Unfortunately, despite her absolute cuteness, her status as a half-half made her a victim of bullying, racism and so much more, which is... pretty messed up to bring up at the time not gonna lie o_o

Starting up the journey, the party discovers that rogues have destroyed a neighboring city, and it just so happens that their base is situed at Shure, the first dungeon of the game . One assumption I like to make from this scene is that life has become so easy and careless on Motavia that people just went and did crime out of pure boredom, because life just wasn't thrilling enough anymore with Mother Brain doing everything it could for its inhabitants...

However, upon climbing said tower, Rolf and Nei find out multiple dead rogue bodies, whom have been presumably murdered by the many biomonsters roaming the place. They do, however, manage to find some dynamite and most importantly, a letter. This piece of paper informs our heroes that the daughter of a Darum, the very same person that tried to murder Nei months ago, is held captive in another tower, which explains why he turned to crime in the first place. They then decide to do the obvious, which is to rescue daughter Teim in her captivity location. Once they meet up with her, she explains her desire to talk to her father to set things straight and sway him from the life he's been getting into, as well as hide her from the surviving rogue members with the help of a veil. Our group manages to meet up with Darum, but... her daughter asks the party to stay put, as she does not want them to interfere with her as she explains things to her father. However, in the heat of the moment, she forgets to remove her veil, which causes Darum to not recognize her. In his confusion, he murders her own flesh and blood and sits there, stunned, as he watches the reason he caused many untold atrocities... wither away below him. Shocked and going insane by this situation, he sees no other way out... but to commit suicide with the help of a bomb.

It gets worse.

While this scene was tragic and brutal to say the least, it does allow Rolf to cross the previously guarded bridge where Darum was always located, which allows him to investigate his mission further.

I do want to make a sidenote here actually! Phantasy Star II does include eight playable characters, but unlike Rolf and Nei they do not join you at fixed intervals - instead, they will become available in your home town of Paseo once conditions are met. Sadly while they do have a recruitment quote, a few lines and a backstory, they do not have an impact on the main story in any way. This does blow as this means PSII does not have much in character development and interaction, but I did want to mention that there’s more to this game than just Rolf and Nei :P 

Upon exploring the regions of Motavia, the party manages to make its way to the Biosystems lab, and what they find here is horrifying to say the least. The lab is in horrible shape, with cracked floors everywhere. On top of that, there is no one inside the lab anymore, it being completely deserted, save for some horrible-looking creatures being kept insides tubes, decorating the now sinister looking building... Because of this, Rolf deems it safe to pick up the recorder inside the lab, to analyze it and try to find out just what exactly went wrong - if anything at all - to hopefully figure out why the world has been sacked by biomonsters. And sure enough, the gang make its way back to Paseo.  After handing over the recorder to the library located in Paseo’s Central Tower, it is now made clear: the biomonsters were caused by a large amount of energy used in a very short amount of time in those labs, causing them to mutate extremely rapidly. This had the predictable but unfortunate effect of ruining the natural order of the ecosystem, which is why these species are wrecking havoc without control. The librarian giving this information also makes the following connection: this outpour of energy must have come from Climatrol - another lab which regulates the weather of the terraformed planet so that it can sustain its new shape. Following this, Rolf and co. take a few steps to reach Climatrol - and I want to highlight a specific one!

The story somewhat pauses until then, but one of the dungeons you’ll go through is a garbage dump... and one of the treasures is a jet scooter you can use! Sounds cool, right? Well it is, but even such a cool object has been abandoned by the lazy society, since teleportation is much more convenient to them. I just thought it was a really neat detail, that’s all ^_^

Once making their way through the relatively normal Climatrol, something does wait for them at the top of the building... something... unsettling...

This is Neifirst. She was another failed experiment just like Nei, sharing the same biological data as her. However, unlike her sister, her creators tried to kill her on the spot due to her status. This made her enraged against the species that gave her life, and as an act of revenge, decided to unleash this bio catastrophy to slowly wipe us out. This is where another truth is revealed: Nei did not come with Rolf just to protect him, she actually wanted to put a stop to her sister, because while she did dislike being treated like a freak or a monster, she never wanted to hate her species as a whole... It remains that she still wants to stop her sister’s plans, and despite Rolf’s protests, the two engages in a fight. However, due to Neifirst being much stronger, Nei sustains heavy damage and is incapacitated. But, this is where the rest of the party comes in, and thus they finish the job and kill off Neifirst dead in her tracks, Rolf then quickly rushes in to his dear friend’s side, but as he does... it’s too late... Nei is dead.

This is yet another reason why Phantasy Star II is such an important game: it is, to my knowledge, the very first JRPG in which a major playable character dies permanently. Heck, Rolf even tries to bring her back through the local Clone Lab - because yes, citizens have access to eternal life by cloning their bodies until the end of time - but... since Nei’s genetic code was degenerating rapidly, they could not clone her body anymore. And, since Neifirst was also defeated, it is also impossible to get a fresh code back from anywhere in the world. Nei is dead. And you cannot do anything about it.

But don’t worry! It still gets worse!

But just as you’re about to find a way to fix this, it turns out that Climatrol has collapsed, which caused an immense flood all over the world. Since the government - and by extension, Mother Brain - isn’t happy about this, you are now considered a fugitive, a criminal. You are now the bad guy, and you are wanted for treason. 1989, anyone??

This is where the second brilliant story-gameplay integration of Phantasy Star II happens. Where until now you’ve only fought mutated monsters due to the outbreak, the government has now sent thousands of carious cyborgs and robots against you - and lo and behold, this is now the only thing you are fighting in both the overworld and dungeons, and the previous creatures are now nowhere to be seen. THAT’S REALLY SMART. Now sure, even if you are considered evil to many, you still task yourself with the task of unflooding the planet, and to do so you simply reactivate all four colored dams in the continent. However, upon reactivating the fourth one, your party is suddenly ambushed by a trio of robots sent by the cops, and this time? They succeed in capturing you. Your party is now sent in chains on a hovering satellite, as you are sentenced to slowly wither away and die in there without any trial of any sort, simply because you went against Mother Brain’s dear wishes...

But, something goes amiss. The sattelite starts to malfunction, and is now set to crash on one of the three planets of the Algol system. And despite you all trying to alter its course, it is too late. The satellite crashes onto Palma - the planet of the first Phantasy Star game - and it is gone.

That’s right! The planet in which many players took the time to save with Alis’s gang, to have a huge dungeon crawling adventure, the planet where you defeated Lassic in a glorious fashion. GONE. In only a few seconds. But... what about yourself? Well, you actually died! But a space pirate wandering close to the crash site pulled out your remains and cloned everyone’s body back to life... which makes you technically not yourself, and also dead, for the remainder of the game! ...May I remind you this game was developed in 1989?

Tyler the space pirate then escorts the zombie party back to Paseo, but not for long - you see, your commander, who hasn’t truly approved of Mother Brain’s actions against your group, allows you access to a spaceship. This is a big deal, because space travel as a whole has been banned ten years ago due to a major accident in which Rolf had lost his parents, and thus, the one stationed in Paseo is the last one remaining on the planet. But sure enough, Rolf takes the opportunity and travels to the ice planet of Dezolis, or Dezo.

And honestly? Even though this next part has nothing to do with the main story, it’s probably one of my favourites in the entire game. In this section, you simply must make your way through an abandoned space station, which has not seen use in years. At first, you’d think it was somewhat related to the spaceship incident, but as you explore this space station, you find a bunch of animals and newspapers lying around. You not only find some irrelevant ads about various products, but also news flash about a horrible gas spreading throughout the station, begging every inhabitant to evacuate immediately, which... definitively implies a very bleak fate to the place and its inhabitants o_o 

And on top of this unsettling setting, this is the first time you get to hear “Silent Zone”, my favourite track in the game. While the rest of the soundtrack is very upbeat, catchy and all around excellent, this track in particular is very... sad, desolate, lonely, in spite of it being just as catchy! It all combines for a brilliant example of “show, don’t tell” that really sets the mood perfectly to me <3

Either way, upon exploring more of Dezo - a frigid wasteland with few inhabitants - the party gets to meet up with Noah, a party member from Phantasy Star I! After reawakening from a cryogenic sleep, he then reveals that unlike Paseo and Motavia, Dezo basically never submitted with Mother Brain’s control and benefits simply because they did not want to live a life without any struggles. Unfortunately, this is also where you learn that Paseo came to terms with this *after* being to MB’s whims and as such, you can connect the dots and realize that the satellite crash was no accident after all... it was all planned.

Noah, however, knows about how deeply MB has ruined everything for the inhabitants of Motavia and thus tasks Rolf with collecting eight legendary ancient weapons all throughout Dezo, located within some ruinous, empty, cold dungeons which make for stunning atmosphere and presence, believe me!

Once that’s done, he then entrusts Rolf with the ultimate Sword and, thanks to kinetic abilities, sends him and his troupe to the space station housing Mother Brain. And once there, for the first time in centuries, a human being has met with Mother Brain.

And of course, the computer scoffs at those rebelling against her. She laughs at how they think they’d want a life with struggles, wtihout comfort, without anyone providing their needs, when work and hardship seems so uninviting on a desert wasteland like Motavia, or a frigid hell like Dezo. And yet, after a (pretty difficult!) battle, you emerge victorious! Or do you?

After the victorious outcome, Noah senses some additional presences beyond Mother Brain’s spot, and urges the party to investigate. And then... I don’t think I’ll even explain it in words. Please watch what happens. It is disturbing.

Yeah. We, the humans, were destroying our planet, Earth. Thus, we escaped through this spaceship to avoid extinction, and found the Algo system. It then, to our species, only seemed logical with so few numbers, to instead slowly weaken the population of all three planets with Mother Brain, making it then easy (although a very long process) to get rid of the population and start anew, even if it meant genocide. What I love about this twist ending is not only how it’s presented: the creepy music, the way you did *not* expect it at all, the number of humans on the screen at once, and so on... but also, how you don’t even know for sure how it ends. You don’t know if Rolf, Rudo, Amy, Kain, Hugh, Shir, Anna... if any of them survived. But it looks grim. It looks like we lost. And it looks like everyone we fought and tried to save... will rot until the final days anyway... Phantasy Star II... is important. Sure, I could talk about how the game is challenging due to how both your party members AND the enemies are very capable in battle or the stellar, catchy, memorable soundtrack...   but its story... is stunning. In 1989, we were still used to princesses being saved by armored heroes from dark dragons. We were used to things going all well in the end. But in 1989, Phantasy Star II taught us many things that would become staples in the future of JRPGs:  Yes, your cherished ones may die with you not being able to do anything about it No, you may not be able to save everyone you’d like to. Yes, your actions might make things worse for yourself and everyone else. No, things aren’t quite as black or white as they seem. And no, you might not always win. Phantasy Star II is a masterpiece. It’s a bit hard to approach this game today, but with a guide, this game is a must play. It’s unique. It’s ambitious. It’s chilling. And I adore this game to pieces. Thank you for reading, somehow <3

[booksandwords]

Intensity by Sherrilyn McQueen

Series: Chronicles of Nick, #8 Read time: 1 Day Rating: 5/5

The quote: Let no one take you down. You stand and you fight until the end! Not for fanfare, or for applause or laurels, but because you know what’s right and what’s wrong. Never fight because you have an audience or to gain esteem or notoriety. You fight for what matters—for the right things in life. Truth. Honesty. Dignity. Let no one steal, lie or cheat. You keep what you earn and never allow anyone to run over you because of the lies they tell others. And the lies others are so willing to believe about you. — Cherise Gautier

I am not tagging this with a spoiler warning but read on at your own risk. Intensity (and this review) contain spoilers for the Dark-Hunter verse.

We ended Invision with Simi in danger and being framed for murder. The murders of Tyree and Alan were actually committed by Cyprian Malachai, Nick's son with Laguerre. Cyprian is exactly as dangerous as he sounds given he is the son of a Malachai and War. Cyprian and Laguerre are the ones that Grim was sensing in Instinct and possibly the ones that bought out the Zeitjägers. The very first chapter of Intensity before the prologue, kinda like an introduction but not is called The Meaning of Time. It is about the Zeitjägers, about how they were born and why they were needed. It indicates they will be important to the story in some way.

Interestingly the end of Invision is not addressed until about halfway through the book. Simi isn't addressed at all. There is an awful lot of emotional punches in Intensity. Jared is completely unaware of Xevikan's existence. He knows Myone is his mother but thinks that Jaden is his father not his grandfather. Something I've suspected for a while is that Jared and Jaden are in a self-sacrificial protection loop. Hearing more of the story confirms it for me. Add Xev to the mix, who sacrificed his happiness allowing his father to raise his son and the whole thing is just tragic. We get to meet the beautiful Myone, that was just one of the time I cried in this book. Crying for what might have been and her happiness at meeting her great-grandson. There was a shock for me in that section, it is so easy to see why Xev fell fo Myone why he risked so much for his love of her.

Intensity is a good name for it. Not only is Nick's world ramping up but there is a lot packed in plot-wise. It is an intense read. But I did read it in a single sitting. The ending is effective, if unexpected. It explains a lot. Why Caleb isn't known, why Adrian is gone. Yes, I cried. But it wraps up the series well. If Sherri had decided to leave it there I would have been okay with that. There was true happiness in seeing Xev and Caleb just watching content and talking. Xev openly thinking that Nick is now his and Myone's legacy. But yet again Sheer throw information that we are almost expected to know but didn't. Like Braith and Apollymi being one and the same? Since when? Aside from that, there are a few implications that never lead anywhere like were the swords were saved by Jaden? What happened with Simi? They don't detract per see. Especially because it gives the next series somewhere to go immediately. With questions to answer.

Have a dump of thoughts from my reading.

Of course, Nathen is Cyprian. His pure power is why Kody and Caleb can't sense him. But I'm surprised it isn't having an impact on Caleb having two masters in one place. Though Nathen’s identity is not confirmed explcitly.

Takeshi and Nashira are brilliant together. I did not expect Takeshi at all. He's wonderful. But a trickster demon and a time guard (aka a yōkai and a Zeitjäger) feel like an odd combination, I'd love to know that story.

I like Shadow. I swear I've read a book with him in him before. But I would have noted him in my reviews and I didn't (though I have read the Deadmen series multiple times).

Takara is a surprise. I did not expect to see her. SHe's not in her humanoid form but she is there. Good lord she belonged to Kissare, the father of the first Malachai. She was only ever wielded by two. Kissare and Jared.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love the mighty chihuahua as a nickname for Cherise?

Something it's taken me an embarrassingly long time to pick up about Vawn. He's coded trans. Yes here it is by magical means but he is still trans he is a man living in a woman's body.

I really like the Celtic triplets, Arswyd Gan Drindod, the Terror by a Trinity. Rhyvawn Ddu (usually called Vawn), Kaziel and Aeron.  They are terrifying yes but man oh man they are fantastic.

Is it Neria or Nyria? I'm wondering if it is a term of endearment. Her name is Nekoda Kennedy or Belam.

"And not all that far in the future. It would all start when Julian and Grace reunited with Kyrian" (Kody, p.222) — And that would be Night Pleasures. (Julian's story, Julian of Macedon is a prequel)

Damn, I was off on Simi's husband. It's Savitar. It makes sense. Between them, they can broaden the scope of the Omergrion Council. And there aren't too many beings that Acheron would trust Simi with.

So here we are the last book in the Chronicles of Nick series. While I had spoilers for some aspects of the series mostly who characters are and parentage I had no idea for the series ended. I somehow managed to avoid those spoilers. I looked up what happens after this. There is a four-part series called Shadows of Fire, focused on Cyprian Malachai then a trilogy for adults to finish everything off.  Sherri confirms in the bio for Shadows of Fire that CoN & SoF are Nick from Dark-Hunters real and true past. That said due to the dramas with he-who-shall-not-be named we are looking are 6+ years before Heart of Venom (book one in the SoF series). I'm not going to look at the series overall as I sometimes do in the last book od a series because as Nick says “Take my word for it. The end is just beginning.” (Nick p. 280). But what I will say is the series does stand alone if Sherri never gets to Shadows of Fire.

I put in my review for Invision that I felt I needed a family tree to keep up with the familial connections in the Chronicles of Nick. I chose not to add it to that review after reading this before finishing that review (yes I read this in a single sitting the next day). So I'm adding a family tree to this review. It's a family tree such as I read it from the books. There is likely to be errors in here but this is my interpretation of the information we were given. Including the piece where Braith is Apollymi. I know the Dark-Hunter verse a bit, if she is Braith no one knows it. Braith is missing, she's off wandering as far as I understood. But then again most people have no clue who Jaden and Menyara are. CoN gives a dangerous amount of information if you know how to interpret it. Razer is in play though not in CoN, he goes by the Egyptian name Set (I think). If I'm right Razer is tied into Kody's line. So my family tree has some indications of where there is heavy speculation. I did use Sherri's website for some of my workings.

[jibrillenyan]

Eldarya Come-Back

[Disponibile in Italiano qui]

Eldarya EU servers are back up. For people out of the loop, a fire destroyed both the servers and the backups of Eldarya. It's not beemoov's fault.

BR and US servers, stored somewhere else, are perfectly ok.

The FR server accounts were lost, but the story retrieved.

All the others (IT HU PL DE ES RU) have both the accounts and the story wiped out. ANE has been re-translated/Recovered, but origins is currently only playable in english.

Only the first 2 episodes of ANE have been translated so far. Errata corrige: PL, RU, ES haven't released any ANE episodes yet. DE IT and HU have the first 2 available in english. DE and HU appear to be broken.

Level 7 and episode 6 of origins (completed) are needed to access the market.

BUG REPORT: Currently there is a bug where if you change the name of your companion for the first time after evolving it you lose 100gc. please take care.

BUG REPORT: If you already have a companion and you play episode 3 of Origins you won't be able to hatch the companion Kero gives you and you might get stuck right after "Objective: Go to Kero’s room to complete the Companion Questionnaire" 

Accounts must be recreated. You have to create a new account and, if you ever bought maana or gold coins, follow the instructions below.

I REPEAT, ACCOUNTS ARE LOST ON THE EU SERVERS. YOU MUST MAKE A NEW ACCOUNT. (sorry, I get this one a lot)

FAQ of sort under the cut, original here. Italian translation will be here starting tomorrow. warning: it’s long XD

♦ WHAT DO I GET?

Everyone gets 1000 maanas, 100 gold coins and 350.000 ancient coins upon creating an account. You will also get 5 big exp potions, 10 small, 5 big energy potions, 10 small, 1 evolution potion and 3 incubators. You will also get the companion Sogiluv... it's not very good. You can retrieve some (most?) of the currency you bought by contacting the support (see below), you will be credited maana/ancient coins depending on your purchases; once you get the money back the 3 spin-offs will automatically unlock, along with the bank outfits.

The first companion to hatch will require no incubation time.

BR and US Server got 10.000 AC for their troubles too, but no maana or GC or items.

♦ I ENDED UP IN THE WRONG GUARD.

Please check this page. Re-doing the 3rd episode of Origins WON'T help.

♦ DECORATING GUARDIENNE'S ROOM, EP 5-6.

If you want to know how to get the guy you like AND have the room decorated by him, or other questions along these lines check this link

♦ WHAT'S THE BEST COMPANION TO USE?

Since you can now get any companion you like if you want to get the "best" one in terms of energy/luck ratio you should consider these:

PLESE NOTE: Hatching an adult companion (Chiromagnus, Blobbiathan) has the advantage of giving you an adult companion AND saving the evolution potion. This could be nice to have, for example, during a map event, you can use all the energy of your companion after midnight, then hatch another egg, use all the energy of the baby, evolve with the potion, use all the energy of the adult. If well played , with a baby companion, it means potentially 400-500 energy to use on the map

"Best" Companion, bought food (36 maana): Blobbiathan Energy 170 (already an adult when hatched) Luck 360 - 400

"Best" Companion, bought food (30 maana or less):

1. Chiromagnus Energy 160 (already an adult when hatched) Luck 340-390

2. Zarali Energy 90-160 Luck 350-380

3. Ocemas Energy 100-150 Luck 310-360

4. Ciralak Energy 110-160 Luck 300-350

4. Rawist Energy 110-160 Luck 300-350

"Best" Companion, farmed food (in exploration):

1. Alfeli: Energy 80-150 Fortuna 320 -370

2. Gallytrot: Energy 110-150 Fortuna 320-370

I consider the Alfeli "better" because its food, elven grapes, comes from a 20energy/30 min area, Mont sizhe, compared to the food for the gallytrot, gallyflore, from the Cave (35 energy/60 min).

♦ WHAT CAN I USE ANCIENT COINS FOR?

There is a special ancient coins shop (Until May 9th) with ALL the items ever released in the game. I do not advise using them for Origins illustrations but I suggest you grab some of the rarest items at least. It's among the boutiques.

BANK ITEMS WILL ONLY APPEAR AFTER RETRIEVING THE PURCHASED CURRENCY (? Im not sure about this, some are there from the beginning and I'm still waiting on the email I sent for the currency)

♦ HOW LONG DOES THE SHOP LAST?

May 9th

♦ HOW DO I GET MY BOUGHT MAANA/GOLD COINS BACK?

Go to "your account" by clicking on your name (top right). There is a button to retrieve the credit, for many payment options there is a simple form to fill.

However, if you paid by credit card or paypal you have to send an email to the support (you can get the adress by clicking on "other"). In the mail you should include:

Credit card:

- Old/New Username (if they aren't the same) - The email address associated to the accounts - The date and the amount in €/$ of a recent transaction (max 12 months old, the most recent, the better). - Last 4 digits of the credit card you used. - I'm not sure what happens if you you used more than a credit card, I'd suggest sending one transaction per credit card and telling them about this issue.

Paypal:

- Old/New Username (if they aren't the same) - The email address associated to the accounts - If it's not the same email address, the email address/username of the paypal account. - The date and the transaction ID* of a recent transaction (max 12 months old, the most recent, the better).

* Transaction ID's can be found in the confirmation email you get when you make a payment or on the paypal website, in the payment history section.

One ID should suffice, they can retrieve them all from there.

♦ WHAT DO YOU ADVISE WE BUY?

On a general note, do not buy things that can be found at all times, like explorations items, other than that, anything you like, but I'd at least consider to buy/play the following:

*** PLEASE NOTE: I've heard rumors that during each event, you will be able to find things in explorations from the previous events of that kind, so easter should have the other easter events' outfits on the map. I'd wait a bit to spend the coins to see if we get any confirmation, the store will be open until May 9th.

HOW CAN I KNOW WHERE (SOMETHING) IS FROM?

Wiki. Or This wonderful site. Or the wikinyan (c'est moi!), I don't mind answering specific messages, I'll update this post with any question I get. If you don't know the french name you can find it out in the French shop.

1. COMPANIONS:

Other than the event companions that you like you should probably consider...

GET:

Minaloo and Draflayel. These only comes from the purro'swap. Once the store closes, if you're unlucky, you'll never see them again.

Calunko and Bunraku. They're 2 of the japan expo rewards and with the merchandise boutique closed, they're incredibly hard to obtain, you need a physical code.

Chiromagnus, while you can get this from explorations, the scroll for it is extremely rare, and 2000 AC is stealing it.

ON THE FENCE:

The Seryphon , Poulpatata (both of them) and the chestok. These can be found on AH but require Gold coins to get in exploration. Personally I won't get them, but it's personal preference.

SKIP:

All the normal explorations companions, no matter how rare. They'll start popping up at the market soon enough

2. CLOTHES:

This is clearly completely at your own discretion, Events and ranking rewards should be considered. However there are some times never released before, like the fireflies so...

GET:

Fireflies. A beta-tester reward item, they were never made available to purchase before.

Steam girl set (Total: 1594 AC). It's the japan expo 2017 reward, 9 pieces

Maana demon and its other 3 colorations is a skin never seen in the game, previously reserved for admins. It could however be added to explorations, like other items of this kind.

Frency French was once an inside joke for ChiNoMiko, has not been made available to the public before, you can buy the skin, the hairstyle (it's a special jackson), Frency French Top, etc it's just a joke, but it's still something you won't see again, if you like it.

ON THE FENCE:

Depending how much you hate alchemy, you can consider some alchemy stuff.

Some rare Skins like Nan'vi, that could be hard to find in explorations

Rainbow and Pearly hair colours, if you like them, they can be rare/offered only in rare circumstances.

Crylasm set (526 AC), top, socks, hat. It was a special Christmas outfit released one piece at a time during Christmas events of 2016, 2017, 2018

Healer support Set (400 AC), made of 7 pieces, it was a special gift given at the beginning of the 2020 pandemic)

Rainbow Spirit (1594 AC), released for the 2020 Pride month (sorta)

Guard ranking rewards, the total il 11.980 AC (thanks Desdhi ♥)

SKIP:

Anything normally on the shop, or from (normal) map explorations.

3.ILLUSTRATIONS:

GET:

Possibly the event ones you like the best, there should be 42 event illustrations for a total of 105.000 ac

SKIP:

If you have the time to farm, the episodes' ones. They're way cheaper with replay, with a few exceptions (see below).

ON THE FENCE:

There are a few episodes where it's cheaper to buy the other illustrations than replay, I'll make a list below.

♦HOW MUCH IS... 

EGGS

As "one time" I mean it's either now or never, so exclusive items or event items, unless they come back with their event.

No Explorations is events + rare +the stuff  that you would pay gc to get the bait for

All the eggs: 222.400,

One-time + rare ones: Chiromagnus, Minaloo Draflayel: 164.500

one-time: 158.000

No explorations (+GC/rare ones): 180.700

BACKGROUNDS:

All: why do you hate yourself? don't. it should be around 5660

Events only: 2460

EPISODES:

Event Illustrations are 2500 each, Episodes' 2000

It's generally cheaper to play the episode to unlock illustrations. Coins won't disappear, so if you can slowly make your way up you will end up saving A LOT of Ancient Coins. During episodes, each dialogue is 2 AC

(cost is rounded up) (!) = Replaying is not worth it, money wise (*) = more expensive than 1 illustration, but still worth it in the grand scheme of things

(how much it costs playing Origins VS how much it costs at the shop)

Episode 1 - Free - 1 Illustration, play once (FREE vs 2000) Episode 2 - Free - 3 Illustrations, play twice (FREE vs 6000) Episode 3 - Free - 1 Illustrations, play once (FREE vs 2000) Episode 4 - Free - 2 Illustrations, play once (FREE vs 4000) Episode 5 - Around 1200 maana - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (3600 vs 6000) Episode 6 - Around 1500 maana - 2 illustrations, play once (1500 vs 4000) Episode 7 - 1200maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 4 times (4800 vs 8000) Episode 8 - 1700maaana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 3 times (5100 vs 8000) Episode 9 - 2000 maana ca - 1 Illustration, play once (2000 vs 2000) Episode 10 - 1500 maana ca - 3 Illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 11 - 1900 maana ca - 2 illustrations, play once (1900 vs 4000) Episode 12 - 1500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 13 - 1500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 14 - 1500 maana ca - 2 illustrations, play once (1500 vs 4000) (!) Episode 15 - 2500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (7500 vs 6000, it's better to buy the other 2!) (!) Episode 16 - 2150 maana ca - 1 illustration, play once (2150 vs 2000 it's still worth to play the episode) (*) Episode 17 - 2450 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play ONCE (2450 vs 6000) Episode 18 - 1900 maana ca - 6 illustrations, play 3 times (5700 vs 12000) Episode 19 - 1700 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (6800 vs 8000) Episode 20 - 1800 maana ca - 5 illustrations, play 4 times (7200 vs 10000) Episode 21 - 1800 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play once (1800 vs 6000) Episode 22 - 1700 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 3 times (6800 vs 8000) (!) Episode 23 - 2100 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (8400 vs 8000, it's better to buy the other 3!) Episode 24 - 2000 maana ca - 2 Illustrations, play once (2000 vs 4000) (!) Episode 25 - 2500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play once (2500 vs 6000) (!) Episode 26 - 2200 maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play three times (6600 vs 8000, it's better to play once for 2 illustrations then buy the other 2!) Episode 27 - 1800 maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 3 times (5400 vs 8000) Episode 28 - 1700 maana ca - 5 illustrations, play 3 times (5100 vs 10000) (!) Episode 29 - 3250 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (13000 vs 8000 it's a huge ac loss to replay) (!) Episode 30 - 2400 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times. (9600 vs 8000 it's better to play once and buy the other 3)

Grand total so far: 93 Illustrations, 71 playthroughs, 58 suggested.  Extimated maana/Ancient coins: 129.000 replay eveything vs  186.000 buying everything. Optimal:  122.750

IF you play everything once then buy the rest you should spend around 146000

* Optimal means buying the illustrations where needed before May 9th, then play all the episodes at your leisure.  The episodes where you'd have to buy illustrations are: 15, 23, 26, 29, 30.

Please remember that if you buy the illustrations then you decide to play the game you will ended up paying not only 186.000 ac for the illustrations, but also roughly 60.000 to play all the episodes. The only case where my racommendation is to buy the illustrations is if you really don't care about origins or you only want a few illustrations

[hlupdate]

The relationship between A-list muse and lauded designer is nothing new. But few have been as serendipitous that of Harry Styles and Alessandro Michele: the pop star’s solo career coincided neatly with the designer hitting his stride as the game-changing creative director of Gucci. Theirs is a mutually beneficial partnership that has elevated the former to new echelons of style, while the latter has become something of an icon to an unexpected fandom.

Unlike the large-scale productions of recent show seasons, Michele first presented his vision for Gucci with a quietly confident collection on 19 January 2015 — reportedly pulled together in just five turbo-charged days. The collection had all the signifiers of the retro-inspired aesthetic that has since become Michele’s beat, introducing the fur-lined loafers, pussy-bow blouses and florals that still form the backbone of his work today. A 20-year-old Harry, meanwhile, was still a long-haired One Direction member set to embark on the band’s biggest ever — and as it turned out last— tour. Just as One Direction’s days were winding down, Michele was picking up speed. Gucci reported a five per cent rise in sales in the last three months of 2015, amounting to 1.1 billion Euro in the final quarter.

Stylist Harry Lambert, who had been working with Harry for a few years by then, decided it was time for the boy-bander to try something new. A floral suit – that floral suit – from Michele’s spring/summer 2016 collection would be just the ’fit for the American Music Awards in November 2015, they decided.

Looking back it was a “very bold move,” Lambert admits. Styles was the first to take one of Michele’s full menswear looks from the Gucci catwalk and wear it on the red carpet. “It was very exciting to see everyone’s responses, but also how great he looked in it,’’ Lambert told Miss Vogueof what he still views as a turning point in his client’s fashion journey. This winning suit encouraged Styles and Lambert to pull more Gucci, and Harry gave his final performance as a member of One Direction wearing a suit in the retro petal print that defined Michele’s early collections.

In fact, Gucci was just about the only thing that the 1D alum carried over to his solo career. Even his shoulder-length curls were shorn. The music videos that accompanied Styles’s eponymous number one album, released in April 2017, all incorporated Gucci, as did his appearances on the promo trail. A navy tailored coat floats through the sky in the video for “Sign Of The Times”, and he wears floral tailoring in the clip for “Kiwi”. When the time came for Harry to take his record on the road, he wore countless bespoke Gucci suits on stage. Most were floral brocade with flared trousers, and paired with pussy-bow shirting.

By June 2018, the relationship had been formalised. Styles was revealed – in a series of photos taken by Glen Luchford in the suitably English setting of a chip shop – as the face of Gucci’s tailoring campaign. Two more campaigns followed, in which Styles models the most exuberant of Michele’s creations without ever sacrificing his schoolboy cheekiness, not even with a lamb slung around his shoulders. The campaigns, two by Luchford, a third by Harmony Karine, helped to usher in a new dawn in menswear advertising.

A year later Harry was unveiled as part of a diverse line-up in the campaign for Gucci’s Mèmoire D’une Odeur — the near century-old house’s first gender-neutral scent. Yes, he was the main event, but Styles shared the spotlight with other creatives in what became an unavoidable campaign, covering buildings, beauty counters, column inches and iPhone wallpapers across the globe. Styles has since quipped that he wears it to bed,making a bottle a necessary purchase for even half-dedicated Harry fans.

That Harry’s work with Gucci has proved so popular with his dedicated fanbase is a key component in the success of their collaborations. Though — and again, this is likely owing to Harry’s own allegiances — his followers do tend to have a keen interest in fashion compared to other fandoms, it’s down to their idol that Harries know the artistic director by his first name alone. “It is really exciting for us fans to see another facet of Harry as a creative individual, and his Gucci partnership cultivates that and gives us an even more in-depth perspective of who he is,” Nadhila, a 26-year-old fan in Indonesia told Miss Vogue.

Nadhila, who has been a part of the team behind the Twitter account @HSNewsUpdate since 2011, believes that the fluid nature of Michele’s vision has contributed to the interest in Harry’s Gucci looks. “There are no boundaries on what he might come up with, so fans are always excited to see what look [Harry] might step out in next,” she says. Styles’s efforts to be a fan-focused, ethical pop star – his motto is “treat people with kindness” – are relevant, too. “He has inspired us to be bold, unique and unafraid to experiment when it comes to fashion,” she adds. “He has shown us that there is no such thing as too feminine or too masculine, we can be both and we can be ourselves.”

Another of Harry’s biggest fan accounts, @TheHarryNews, is run by four women in their mid-twenties: Annie, Océane, Lena and Rachel. “You can really see the confidence he’s gotten from working with Gucci,” they share collectively over email. “[He’s] taking more risks and letting more of himself show… In a lot of ways we’ve seen Harry really come into his own. I think that really resonates with people, especially his fans, who get tiny pieces of [who he really is] through fashion.”

Two fans who have an almost encyclopedic knowledge of this fashion partnership are the transatlantic duo behind @HSFashionArchive. Since April 2016, London-based Lu and Washington DC-based Alex have documented every look worn by Harry in meticulous detail, all to act as “a resource for fans”. Its posts lets his followers know how they might go about procuring these items, but also sheds light on key house codes – thus enabling fans to quickly identify which of Harry’s looks are Gucci, and which aren’t. “We have noticed that fans buy the Gucci pieces that Harry has worn,” 29-year-old Alex explained. “Though some pieces are pricey, we’ve seen people buy the loafers, boots, and bags that Harry has sported over the years. Lots of our followers bought the £34 Gucci lipsticks he wore in Beauty Papers.”

The pair believes that the relationship works because Gucci is able to offer Harry such a broad spectrum of looks to choose from. “Gucci’s looks range from wearable to outrageous, so Harry’s continued partnership with Gucci guarantees both attainable style and flashy moments. There’s nothing like seeing him in a wild new outfit that we couldn’t have anticipated.” And though one might assume the scene-stealing suits are most popular with fans, according to Nadhila, they like his low-key looks best, given that “they show a more casual and intimate look into who he is as a ‘normal’ person”.

Of course, there is a notable exception: the 2019 Met Gala. For the opening evening of the “Camp: Notes On Fashion” exhibition Michele and Harry acted as co-hosts, and arrived on the pink carpet together. “After such a colourful tour wardrobe it was nice to do something a little unexpected,” Lambert told Miss Vogue of the black blouse Styles wore. “[It was about] taking traditionally feminine elements like the frills, heeled boots, sheer fabric and the pearl earring, but then rephrasing them as masculine pieces set against the high-waisted tailored trousers and his tattoos. Camp, but still Harry.” Lambert explained at the time: “We met up earlier this year to share mood boards with the Gucci team. We had pages of printed references all on the table from Alessandro, myself and Harry, then we edited them down.” Today, the @HSFashionArchive duo agree the night “was a massive deal amongst fans”.

There was the now pearl earring-wearing fashion darling of the music world, standing alongside the closest thing to a rockstar the fashion industry has at present. “I love dressing up and he loves dressing up,” Michele told The Face in 2019. “The moment I met him, I immediately understood there was something strong around him. I realised he was much more than a young singer. He was a young man, dressed in a thoughtful way, with uncombed hair and a beautiful voice. I thought he gathered within himself the feminine and the masculine.”

Since the Met, the relationship has continued to go from strength to strength. Styles wore a custom look on the cover of his second record, Fine Line, shot by Tim Walker, and Michele and Styles collaborated on a T-shirt to coincide with it, with a percentage of the sales going to the Global Fund For Women. Gucci’s high-waisted trousers, cropped blazers and dazzling shirting now takes up even more space in Styles’s wardrobe, and bring as much attention to the star as his sophomore record’s commercial and critical success.

Sightings of Styles in Gucci have become a source of comfort for fans in a turbulent 2020. From his Mary-Janes at the Brits to his oversized turquoise blazer and crochet gloves in the “Golden” video, by way of outré sunglasses and floral sunglasses in the clip for “Watermelon Sugar”, Harry’s recent sartorial choices have managed to be pleasingly familiar, while simultaneously keeping his followers on their toes.

A bit like the chicken and the egg conundrum, the question remains: is Harry very Gucci, or is Gucci very Harry? The verdict is out. But without each other, both might be missing a little something.

[letbenfuck2021]

be the thing that buries me (ao3)

For the last four years, Vanya finds herself both prison and prisoner. She doesn’t have super powers. She isn’t physically strong or a tactical genius. But ordinary and helpless as she is, Vanya is determined to find a way to save her brother. She doesn’t want her body to be a cage anymore.

sequel to “inside your head the sound of glass”

rating. explicit. warnings/tags. pseudo/sibling-incest, dub-con, dead dove: do not eat, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, dark fic.

chapter 1:

It’s cold in the city. Winter came early this year, a brutal cold snap billowing in about a week or so after the Academy turned eighteen and it showed no signs of letting up. And it is this frigid autumn that finds Vanya nearly freezing at the kitchen table, attempting to cut carrots into somewhat bite-sized pieces. She is, so far, mostly failing.

“Vanya darling,” Grace calls from across the room where she is preparing cornish hens for roasting. “Why don’t you head to the drawing room? It’s much warmer up there.”

This was the third time Grace had made this exact suggestion in the past hour. Vanya’s clacking teeth and the precarious way her hands shake as she presses the blade of her knife down is agitating Grace’s programming. Each heavy thunk against the cutting board causes Grace to twitch, an electrical impulse in her software reacting to the quickly climbing probability of injury occurring.  

“I’m okay, mom,” Vanya replies under her breath before lifting the butt of the knife once more and wrestling the carrot into place under the blade.  

It’s a little past four in the afternoon and already dark, a cold blue light washes the room and leeches all the warmth from the air. A few moments, Grace will reach for the light switch on the far wall and plunge them into the dingy orange light of the fluorescents overhead. But for now, Vanya sits at the kitchen table, shivering under a large sweater, a hoodie and two thermals and narrowly fails to slice open her own hand as she cuts away another jagged, ugly piece of carrot.

“What the fuck? Watch what you’re doing, Al! You almost took my fucking head off!”

“Don’t be a bitch, Diego.”

The echo of Allison and Diego’s bickering wafts in through the open window above the kitchen sink from outside in the courtyard. They’re running drills practically in the dark and it is only growing darker, but her siblings still have another thirty minutes to go before they can venture indoors. When their father took Ben, Luther, and Five on mission three week ago, Reginald had given strict instructions for all of those left behind. Her own orders had been sparse but from what she could tell, her siblings’ regimen was rigorous and immensely detailed. When they aren’t training, they are out patrolling and running other smaller missions.  in the last ten days much to her dismay. Vanya sees her siblings more in the paper than in person, but she’s been waiting, planning for her moment and now, it’s almost here. So, despite the cold, despite the blade that veers too close for comfort to her left hand and the damn carrot that rolls once again beneath her knife, Vanya is determined to wait.

“Yeah! Duuun’t be a beeotch, Deeeeee-yego!” Klaus calls from somewhere else in the courtyard before bursting into a shriek of laughter.

Even his laugh sounds slurred. His voice is quite a bit more muffled than either Allison or Diego’s, as though he’d tucked himself into the far corner of the yard and it was really a miracle that he was awake at all. The night before, Klaus had slipped out sometime around midnight and hadn’t returned until that afternoon. No one said a thing when he’d stumbled into the dining room in the middle of lunch and draped himself casually across his seat across from Diego. These days, no one saw virtue in commenting on Klaus’ perpetual lack of sobriety. In the same way that no one said anything about what was going on between her and Five or the horizontal scars littering Ben’s forearms. They’ve all quietly decided that it’s easier to turn a blind eye to all these things. They’ve all agreed that Klaus’ slurred speech sounds better than his screams in the middle of the night.

“Let’s go again, Diego,” Allison called out. “Start from the top.”

If Diego had any reservations about running through another set in the dark freezing cold, he made no audible dispute. Instead, the courtyard went silent again except for the occasional grunt or shout from either of her siblings. Though it didn’t always seem like it, Diego and Allison were a pretty dynamic duo in hand to hand, at least that’s what she’d heard from Five. When he ran missions, Five would often pair them together despite Allison’s protests. Keeping Allison and Luther apart was perhaps a petty move on Five’s part but it was also a strategic one. Five often talked about their siblings to Vanya, his dissatisfaction with them, his begrudging affection all tied up in his keen observation. It’s a little like listening to a story, a novel on audiobook about people in a far away land. After what happened to Five, the line in the sand that was between Vanya and her siblings was now drawn in concrete. Reginald had always done his best to keep her separated from the others. She wasn’t a complete fool. Having her hold blank clipboards, blow whistles, and stand beside him during training were all his not-so-subtle ways of indicating to them all that Vanya was not like them. And if that message wasn’t clear enough then the slow building resentment towards her would surely do the job. Though her mundanity had damned her, it had saved her as well from the brutal, violent reality that her siblings inhabited. They all begrudged her, her normal and therefore privileged existence. What happened to Five was just the final nail in the coffin. Not even Ben would acknowledge her these days.

“Ah!”

The knife slips in her grasp too far for her to recover in time before the blade cuts a line across her thumb, from the edge of her nail to the first knuckle. The wound looks, at first, completely innocuous. Bright red across her pale, clammy skin but thin and strangely static as though someone had drawn on her in red ink. Then, the wound unfolds. Her skin unfurling like a curtain as the blood begins to pour and the sting turns into intense pain.

“Oh dear,” Grace suddenly at Vanya’s side.

Before she bleeds all over the table, Grace reaches out and grips Vanya’s thumb with a kitchen towel. Her mother squeezes tightly, the pressure stopping the sharp pain but it’s replaced with a throbbing ache that is just as intense and leaves Vanya breathless.

“Sorry, mom,” Vanya murmurs, finding the words difficult to form.

Grace crouches down, her other hand deftly fishing a small tin box from the pocket of her apron. She releases Vanya’s wounded thumb for a second to open the little box. The aching pressure on her thumb releases for just a second before a sharp burning pain floods her senses. The world seems to shrink to her bleeding digit and Vanya blanches when she sees something white peeking out of the mess of blood and tissue. As soon as the box is opened and placed on the table, Grace’s hand moves to cover her thumb again, her steady fingers putting an uncomfortable amount of pressure over the wound.

"Is it bad?”

“It’s alright, sweetheart,“ she says though Grace has yet to actually inspect the injury.  

They wait like that for a few moments. The pain in her hand is making Vanya’s head spin while Grace begins to hum. Vanya looks up from her finger and finds her mother’s face turned towards the open window over the sink.

"Your brothers and sister should be coming in soon. They’ve been playing all day. I hope they won’t be too tired for dinner.”

She still spoke about them all as though they were children. Breakfasts were still happy faces made of fried eggs and bacon, pancakes with shapes made of chocolate chips. What she must think of them all, her children. Though she made no comment on it, Grace left Vanya’s clean and folded clothes in Five’s room now and left her daily meds there as well. After another moment of looking out into the dark, Grace turns her attention back to Vanya’s thumb and uncovers it. Her face is a portrait of bland concern.

“Hm, we may need stitches,” she says, pinching at the wound and pushing the disparate edges together and letting them fall apart again. “Why don’t we just patch it up for now and we’ll see from there?”

Grace smiles and it’s beautiful. Of course it is, she’d been made to be that way. Vanya often wondered if her mother had once been a real woman, someone with real feelings, with thoughts and desires that existed beyond whatever Reginald had coded into her. Grace stands from her crouched position, easily keeping her balance despite her tasteful, four-inch pumps. She instructs Vanya to replace the towel and put pressure on the wound while she goes to wash her hands at the sink.

“Your brothers and sister should be coming in soon,” she says with her back turned to Vanya. “They’ve been playing all day. I hope they won’t be too tired for dinner.”

The old pipes groan as the faucet sputters, at first there’s barely a trickle but Grace’s hands are poised and moving as though through a steady stream.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine, mom.”

This earns Vanya another wide, blank-eyed smile when Grace turns around wiping her hands on her apron. It takes a few minutes for Grace to clean and bandage Vanya’s thumb. The sharpness of the initial pain has faded and is replaced by deeper ache that makes her head spin and stomach turn ever so slightly. Grace admires her handy work then lets out a small gasp as though she’s just realized something.

“Vanya darling,” she says standing to her full height. “Why don’t you head to the drawing room? It’s much warmer up there.”

Vanya shakes her head, eyes still glued to her injured thumb trying but failing to will the pain away.

“It’s okay,” Vanya implores.

Grace tilts her head to the side, the large curls in her blonde hair shift like water sloshing. She looks troubled, her programming stumped. The girl is clearly half-freezing and now injured as well. She should be someplace warmer, perhaps even in bed. Vanya is fragile, ordinary, and largely incapable of contributing to the household. This all information that has been coded into Grace as truths. Vanya should be out of the way as much as possible but heavily supervised. Quickly, her mechanics run through the options and settle on this.

A wide smile and “maybe some hot chocolate instead. Warm you up a little.”

Before Vanya can decline, Grace sets to work. First she covers the Cornish hens in foil, they’ll need to sit for another half an hour before they’ll be ready for roasting and the stove will need at least half that time to finish rising to temperature. The air in the kitchen is cold enough that she doesn’t need to put birds back in the refrigerator. Instead, she leaves them sitting on the counter when she goes to fetch milk and a saucepan.

“Why don’t you sit closer to the stove, dear? It’s much warmer there.”

Vanya glances out at the window over the sink. She thinks she can just make out the sounds of labored breathing but all she can see is darkness. They’ll be finished soon and she doesn’t want to miss her chance but Vanya is also freezing and the painful throbbing in her thumb is making her dizzy so she relents and slinks across the room to the stove. She bypasses the chair at the end of the table and opts instead to squat down beside the old rusting appliance. Grace had been right; it’s infinitely warmer in her new location, though Vanya already knew it would be. This isn’t the first winter evening that she’s spent crouched at Grace’s feet beside the stove waiting just to catch a glimpse of her siblings.

“Did you remember to take your vitamins today?” Grace says from above her.

Vanya nods, doing her best to balance on her heels and stay clear of the heated metal beside her. How could she ever forget? Her “vitamins” are actually a cocktail of different medications that she takes on a daily basis. Recently, she’d noticed the arrival of a new pill, round, pale and though she’d been given no explanation for its sudden appearance the timing of its addition suggests that it was some kind of contraceptive. It had been Five who offered that particular hypothesis about the new pill’s purpose. And despite being somewhat relieved that she had one less thing to worry about, Vanya had been downright scandalized and denied even the possibility. Instead she had insisted that there must have been a new development in her condition.

The smell of milk heating wafts through the air, cutting through the cold and making Vanya’s stomach churn. Her thumb still hurts, the pain seems to be growing as more time passes but she tries not to think about it. Instead, she focuses on Grace humming a song that sounds simultaneously familiar and alien as the warm smell of milk and chocolate hangs in the air.

Vanya considers asking Grace now about the new pill. It isn’t uncommon for pills to appear and disappear according to what her condition required. When she was four, Vanya had contracted a highly contagious illness and had to be quarantined away from the rest of her siblings for months. She’d undergone multiple treatments and a couple surgeries, and even now she required vigilance and a strict adherence to a daily chemical regimen prescribed by her father.

Vanya could remember practically nothing of her illness and the resulting treatments. Most of early childhood is a vague smudge for Vanya and what she knows of her condition is a patchwork of bits and pieces she’s overheard or been told. Nothing from that time of her life feels real, except for Five of course. He’s the only thing that she can remember with any sort of clarity from her childhood. There is of course the rejection, the loneliness, the utter desolation of being an ordinary child in a clutch of extraordinary ones, but those things are more like a murky lake of misery. Five stands out like a raging flame. She remembers him dogging her relentlessly, always seeking her company, rooting out her little hiding spots in the house. At first, it had been painfully awkward to be under the weight of his attention but it wasn’t long before painful awkwardness became desperate craving. Now, Vanya can’t imagine who she could possibly be without Five.

The stove steadily grows hotter and Grace’s humming begins to skew atonal. Five and the others are scheduled to return that night though. Reginald had called earlier in the day but, according to Pogo, he didn’t give a specific time. The thought of Five’s impending return sets Vanya’s teeth on edge, with both eagerness and apprehension. Pogo had been tight lipped about the progress of their mission and so she had no ability to tell what mood her brother would be in when he returned. Every mission took a toll on him, truthfully on all her siblings and Vanya worries what state Five will return to her in but she wants Five home, whatever state he’s in.

“Oh my dears! You’re practically popsicles!”

Grace’s exclamation jostles Vanya awake. At some point, she’d managed to drift off with her back pressed against the wall and balanced on her heels. She’s sweating beneath her layers, the stove’s oven is nearly to temperature.

“We’re fine, mom,“ Diego replies, his voice is labored and when Vanya peeks up over the table, she notices that he has Klaus on his back.  

“Why don’t you all have a seat, you’re just in time for hot chocolate!”

There’s a shuffle of feet and the sound of a chair legs screeching across the floor. Vanya rises to her feet just in time to watch Diego dump Klaus unceremoniously into an empty chair.

 ”Ow, Didi,“ Klaus whines. "Try a little tenderness wouldya? I’m precious cargo.”

His speech is still slurred but there’s a clarity to his words that wasn’t quite there earlier when Vanya had overheard him in the courtyard. Besides his griping, the room falls silent as soon as Diego and Allison spot Vanya. They both tense up as though they’ve seen a wild animal.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” Diego snarls.

His animosity is nothing new but Vanya winces regardless and tries to focus her attention on her sister.

“She lives here, genius,” Allison retorts glibly but the tension doesn’t leave her body.

Grace, seemingly unaware of the uncomfortable strain between her children, moves throughout the kitchen gathering mugs and setting them out on the table.With a mechanical poise, she divides up the hot chocolate into four perfectly even portions. Klaus doesn’t seem to notice what’s happening either. He’s opted to bury his face into his crossed arms resting on the table in front of him and doze off.

“I need to talk to you,” Vanya says, trying her best not to look at her brother.

“Like hell you do,“ Diego barks.

Vanya almost loses her nerve. Of all her siblings, Diego despises her the most or it may just be that he has the hardest time hiding it.

“Relax, Two. Drink your cocoa.”

Despite being Number Three, Allison is the unquestionable superior. Diego could never quite convince himself that he was or could ever be better than his sister. Allison easily outdid all her brothers in almost all things and where she was found lacking, she found ways to make up the difference. Diego      respected     Allison and so he usually deferred to her and this time is no different. He doesn’t stop glaring at Vanya but he takes a seat beside Klaus.

“Let’s talk upstairs, Vanya,” Allison says evenly. “It’ll be warmer up there.”

Vanya nods in reply and follows her sister out of the kitchen. Diego watches her leave with a hostile glare and kicks Klaus’ chair so hard that it jostles him awake. Behind her, Vanya hears them bicker.

"Get up asshole and drink your cocoa.”

“It’s hot chocolate.”

“Same thing.”

“What? No it’s not!”

Their voices grow vague as Vanya and Allison ascend. Vanya’s heart is fluttering in her chest and her stomach, which has been in knots all day, only gets worse. Vanya is afraid of Allison. Not in the way she fears Luther. She still has nightmares of the sound of her own fingers snapping, joints popping out of place and searing pain of skin ripping. She isn’t scared of Allison like she’s scared of Diego who took every opportunity to verbally berate her. Vanya has no memory of Allison ever being especially cruel to her or physically harming her but she knows what Allison can do and that’s more than enough reason to fear her.

“H-how was training?” Vanya asks hesitantly.

As much as she fears her sister, Vanya admires her more. Allison was everything that Vanya wishes she could be. Beautiful, strong, confident and most importantly, Allison is special. She’s extraordinary. And even if she’s scared of her, Vanya wants so badly for Allison to like her.

“It was like negative twenty out there,” Allison replies without turning around. “It sucked.”

Vanya nods even though Allison can’t see her. She doesn’t know how to reply to that. It had been years since she’s been allowed to participate, even in a spectator position, in training.

Allison leads her to the main parlor where a fire’s been lit. It’s exponentially warmer here and Vanya finally feels as though she can think straight. She watches as Allison makes a beeline for one of the ornate couches and lays herself out with a huff. Vanya opts to stand off to the side, nearer to the fireplace.

“Um..thanks fo-

“Just tell me what you want.”

Vanya’s throat suddenly feels dry. She can’t see Allison’s face from where she’s standing but she can hear the cold annoyance in her voice. It makes her feel small but she shoves the feeling down.

“I…I want you to undo the rumor you used on Five.”

Allison sighs heavily from her lounging position.

“Vanya. Really? This shit again?”

“Please, Allison. If you could just try, I know yo-“”

“I’ve already told you. I’m not doing that,“ she says sitting up. "Why don’t you just accept that he’s obsessed with you and take the win?”

“It’s not a win!” Vanya shouts, her voice cracks.

Allison looks genuinely startled by the outburst and it emboldens Vanya. She takes a step closer and continues.

“It hurts him. He’s not even himself anymore and he’s trapped here because of it. Because of      me    .”

What Vanya isn’t saying is, because of you. Allison hears it anyway.

“You can do it,” Vanya implores. “If you would just try.”

“I can’t,“ Allison says, punctuating her assertion by standing.

Allison is fairly tall for a girl her age and she certainly dwarfs Vanya’s miniscule five feet. She’s an intimidating figure but Vanya won’t back down.

"Yes you can. You’re the only one who can help us.”

“This is getting old. And a little pathetic. Enough already.”

With that, Allison turns and makes for the door but Vanya rushes forward. Before she can stop herself, Vanya reaches out and grabs Allison by the wrist.

“I’m just trying to help our brother! Why won’t you help me?”

As soon as Vanya touches her skin, Allison recoils pulling her wrist from her sister’s grasp. The force causes Vanya to stumble and Allison feels sorry for it. In all honesty, she has nothing personal against her sister. She doesn’t particularly like Vanya but she doesn’t hate her the way Diego does and she isn’t scared of her like Klaus and Ben seem to be. Truthfully, Allison doesn’t      know    Vanya. They’d lived practically their entire lives under the same roof, grew up together, shared meals, slept in rooms barely twenty feet apart but Allison had never felt any closer to Vanya than she felt to any given stranger off the street.

“Stop, Vanya. Just stop. You’re not helping, you’re just trying to make me feel guilty.”

“I’m no-”

“Yes. You are. And you know what? I am guilty. I made the rumor. I agreed to say it. I’m guilty. But that hasn’t changed anything for the last four years. It isn’t gonna change anything now. If you really wanna help Five, maybe you should stop blaming everyone else and figure out how to do it on your own.“

"Well you let Dad treat Luther like a tool all he wants,” Vanya says and she knows she should stop but the bitter words spilling out of her like vomit. “I guess it shouldn’t surprise me that you won’t help us.”

Vanya knows she made a mistake. Allison watches as her sister’s expression changes from resentful anger to utter fear and she wants to laugh. Allison had always pitied Vanya for her weakness and they both knew it. But for the first time, Allison is beginning to realize that she doesn’t just pity Vanya, she resents her. She had never once in her life been allowed to even seem weak but her sister wallowed in her frailty, relied on it even. Some dark, nasty part of Allison wonders if that’s why Five was attracted to Vanya so much in the first place. Five like little else more than feeling superior.

“I-I’m sorry,” Vanya stuttered, her eyes wide with fear. “I didn’t mean…”

Her trembling lip, Vanya’s little body shrinking away with anticipation. Terror slinks off of her like a rotten stench. Allison takes it all in and she feels terribly powerful. This isn’t a new experience for her. Allison had often stood above opponents, criminals, vandals, sometimes even her own brothers, and she loved being above them. She liked to savor the intoxicating feeling of being the winner, the victor because that was the Hargreeves way. Do whatever it takes to get on top and stay there. Even if you have to cheat and Allison had no qualms about playing dirty and yet, for some reason, the sight of her sister, trembling before doesn’t make her feel triumphant, it makes her feel sick.

“I’m sorry, Allison. I shouldn’t have said that.”

Vanya barely manages to choke the words out, her teeth are nearly chattering with how sacred she is. Looking at her makes Allison feel sick. Her shoulders suddenly feel too heavy, they slump as she sighs. She’s so tired that it nearly brings her to tears. But she doesn’t cry. Allison doesn’t get to cry, no matter how much she wants to.

"You’re right. You shouldn’t say that. Even if I wanted to, I don’t know if I could undo the rumor. They just have to run their course.”

\\\\

She wakes into the dark with a crick in her neck. She’d fallen asleep with her head at the foot of Five’s bed again, staring out at the snow falling against the darkness. It’s a bad habit but she’d always liked Five’s windows. Vanya isn’t sure when she’d fallen asleep but after her encounter with Allison, she’d dragged herself up to Five’s room, buried herself under his comforter and tried to find some solace in the snowfall outside his window. She must have succeeded because when she wakes, it’s nearly midnight and there’s someone with her in the dark.

“When did you get back?” she murmurs apologetically.

It’s become an unspoken ritual that Vanya waits up for Five when he comes back from a longer mission. It wasn’t always possible, but Vanya tried her best to be there for him whenever he got back. She attempts to turn her head to see his face but the muscles in her neck spasm. She can hear the sound of her own groan entering into the cold silence, jostling the air and she thinks she also hears a laugh. Just a small huff of air really, beside her ear all warm and soft in a way that makes the hair on the back of her neck stand.

His thumb finds the tight muscle in her neck, massaging circles into her flesh. It hurts at first, the sudden pressure makes her gasp and the flush of blood back into the area makes her a little dizzy. He curls his fingers under her neck, arching it upward so that he can suck hickeys into the skin he’d just massaged. She’ll be peppered with purple marks, too high above her collar and plentiful to cover but even so, she cranes her neck and lifts her chin exposing more skin for him to mark. Ever since the Paris job, they had settled into a kind of uneasy armistice. There had been no explicit discussion, no bargaining or clear transaction but something of a conclusion had been reached.

"Fi-ah!”

His teeth find the sensitive spot where her neck curves into her shoulder. Five bites down, hard enough to make her jump but not enough to break the skin. It’s both agonizing and thrilling the way it hurts.

“I missed you,” he mumbles, it’s the first words he’s spoken to her in almost three weeks.

He, Ben, and Luther had been running some kind of reconnaissance mission where secrecy was of the utmost importance and there had been no chance for the odd phone call home. His mouth is hot and wet over her skin as he trails languid kisses along her collar bone then back up to where he’s no doubt left teeth marks in her skin. His breath is warm, ghosting over the sensitive skin.

“Did you miss me?” Five murmurs, hovering over her aching skin.

At first, Vanya can only manage a sigh. He feels good, there’s no denying it. As much effort she puts into keeping the lines drawn between what is real and what is the rumor, Vanya can’t lie about how he makes her feel.  Five would have been a talented lover under any circumstance. Vanya is certain of that though she tries not to think of it much. Even if she believes that had he been given the vast wealth of opportunity that freedom would have afforded him, Five would never have chosen her, it still stings to think of him with others.

Before she manages to answer him in any sort of comprehensible way, Five laves his tongue, wide and flat, over his bite mark. Vanya lets loose a sound that is half whimper and half moan but entirely mortifying. But Five seems to appreciate it, an appreciative hum rumbles across her skin as she tries to catch her breath. It could feel humiliating sometimes, the level of intimacy he demands from her. Five is always struggling closer, ripping through the carefully constructed barriers she’s set between them for their own protection. He wants everything from her, every sound, every reaction and sensation. And had she been more of a fool, Vanya would give it to him freely but she knows that had it not been for the rumor, he would have never wanted it any of this. He may want every single bit of her now, but Vanya knows that when the rumor wears off, he’ll resent for every little inch she gives.

“Five, maybe we shouldn’t-” she begins to say, her nerves outweighing her desires.

But before she can finish her phrase, he bites down again. This time is harder than before, not enough to break the skin but enough to make Vanya yelps. Desperate to find anything to hang on to, she reaches for him, her fingers desperately scrambling across his face, over the shell of his ear, before settling and tangling into his hair. Though her nails are short and dull, there is no doubt that in her frenzy she left behind some damage but Five doesn’t seem to notice or care.

The pain only lasts a moment before he drags his tongue over the new bite dissolving the tension and rendering her a shivering mess. She lets out a low, guttural moan as he continues to mouth at her neck, sucking hickeys into her skin. Something stirs in her belly, a searing, aching need unfurls as his kisses shift downward. The comforter slides off of her body as he draws the middle line of her body. The frigid air is an assault on her body but it only makes her lean into him. Her shoulders rise from the mattress and the hand that had been at her neck trails down between her shoulder blades, propping her up.

She wants to put her arms around him, feel him closer. As terrified as Vanya is of the day when this all comes crashing down, it doesn’t change that she wants Five. Ever since they were kids, Vanya has ached and longed for him, even when he was right beside her. Wanting Five, wanting to be with him, wanting to love him in every way that has, does and will exist is not a new desire for Vanya. Sometimes, she thinks she was born that way. But despite all this, she hesitates as Vanya always does. So cautious, so careful, Vanya loves like a kicked dog. She flinches back before a fist is ever even raised, before he can even think of rejecting her, Vanya has already bowed out in repose.

Vanya is lost to herself, the torrent of desire and fear inside her when she feels the sudden shifting of weight as Five leans back. His hands are gone, the cold crowds in and she loses him in the dark. Turning on to her side, the weight of her raised torso resting on one elbow, Vanya squints into the darkness before her and finds her brother all cast in shadow. He’s not that far from her, his face still level with her own. There’s just enough distance, a few feet maybe, that the darkness leaves his face almost completely obscured. She can make out the curve of his ears, the corners of his jaw but his eyes are lost. He is just a shape, the suggestion of a man but not one entirely. He is some spectre made of stuff darker than the pitch darkness around them. For a second, she’s afraid. She doesn’t recognize him, even when she sits up on her knees, leans in closer. She can’t see him. Her blood pounds in her ears as the fear twists into something else, something more.

“Five?”

“I always forget,” he mumbles but she cannot see his mouth moving. “When I’m away, I always forget. Just how good this feels.”

His voice shakes as he says this, like he’s scared too. Five and Vanya had always shared so much, sweets, sweaters, kisses, why not share their fear as well? Vanya is aware of the phenomenon he’s referring to. It was Diego who had been so kind as to inform her that when Five is far enough away from her, the effects of the rumor lessen and what’s left in its place is a dull ache. A week, maybe a little more and Five starts to act like his old self again.

Hey, Seven. What do you think would happen if you just fucked off for good?   

Though it hurt when Diego spit that particular possibility at her, she had to admit, it’s a fair question. Five always espoused how much he missed her while he was away, how desperately he craved her the whole time but she wonders how much of that was actually true. What if he’d been happy while he was away? What if he’d been free? Or at least close enough.

“Did you miss me, Vanya?” he asks once again, this time he sounds unsteady, unsure.

It breaks her heart to hear her brother so degraded, but she can’t answer him. The words just won’t come as she stares back at him across the darkness, his features bleeding into view as her eyes adjust. He looks young. In the dark, he looks like her brother. The brother that had held her fevered hand when they were all ten and a bout of the flu had ripped through the entire academy but had settled on Vanya for nearly a month. This was her brother, who had kissed her on the mouth with sugar glazed lips and fed her so many doughnuts that she thought she would puke.

This is her brother. And she can’t even bring herself to tell him that she misses him. So Vanya takes off her shirt instead. Five waits in the darkness, watching her strip down to her bra. Vanya can feel his eyes on her as she slides her sweater and shirt off together. Her skin is a shock of goosebumps as her hands, already shaking with the cold, reach back to undo the hooks.

“Let me,” she hears him murmur.

He shuffles forward, even on his knees, he’s still level with her eye line. His long arms reach up and close the distance between them as finds the center of the band. It will only take him a few seconds to undo the hooks. Embarrassingly, Five is better at undressing her than she is but for these scant seconds, Vanya allows herself to rest her cheek upon his chest. It’s a small sin, to give herself this bit of comfort but she still feels the weight of it when Five’s hands slowly trail down her arms, taking the straps of her bra with them. She hears Five take a breath, holds it for a few seconds as he drinks in her body.

“You have no idea, Vanya,” he murmurs. “You can’t even imagine what it’s like for me to miss you.”

It’s true and the guilt she feels because of that makes her want to disappear. He skates his hands up her sides, sighing with relief at just being able to touch her skin. He puts his face into the crook of her neck to breathe in deeply.

“You smell like home,” he says into her skin. “You’re everything to me, Vanya. You know that don’t you? I need you with me.”

She nods slowly. It’s true. It’s all true but none of it’s real. His hands drop down to the waistband of her jeans, undoing the button as he places kisses along her shoulder, then her clavicle. The click of her zipper coming undone is loud in the silent, dark room. Five pushes them over her hips and down to her knees. Vanya sinks down, laying herself out on her back so that he can free her from her pants completely. He moves quickly from there. His fingers are already curling at the elastic band of her underwear when she stops him.

“Wait,” Vanya says, her hands falling over his own to stop their movement.

Five flinches as though she’s burned him. Under her breath, she murmurs an apology. It’s easy to forget just how brittle the rumor has made him. Her brother has always been such a large, looming figure in her mind, confident, strong, intelligent. Even after four years, Vanya forgets just how easily he breaks. With one hand, she laces her fingers through his own, an act meant to reassure him though he doesn’t seem moved. His eyes are hard as he watches her rise from his bed.

“What are y-” he begins to ask when she detangles her hand from his.

But he falls silent as soon as she turns her back to him, falling to her elbows and knees on his mattress. Behind her, Five takes in a sharp breath.

Then she hears, “fuck.”

Her heart is a sharp staccato in her ears as she feels him lay his hands over her hips, slowly, with near reverence. His hands are cold on her skin, colder even than the air around them. And not for the first time, Vanya wonders where he’s been. Part of her wants to ask him, wants to ask him what he’s done and what he’s given up to be here with her again. He pulls her back, pressing his hips into her ass. Through the fabric of their clothes, she can feel the hardness of his cock and it sends a shiver down her spine. He moans as he rocks his hips and Vanya gasps as he squeezes her buttocks. He leans back just far enough to slide his thumb down and press up against her pussy, feeling her through the fabric. Embarrassingly she can feel the cool dampness that’s spread into the fabric.

“You’re so wet, sis. You must have missed me.”

He nudges into her further, the fabric feels almost coarse on the sensitive flesh but Vanya leans back. There’s no point in playing coy now. Five hums appreciatively, massaging slow circles into her through the fabric in a way that makes her head spin. She’s panting like a dog in heat by the time she feels him push her damp panties aside.

He pushes into her without preamble. It’s rough and Vanya lets out a low sob as the pleasure of him filling her flushes up her spine like a fever. He loops an arm under her belly to hold her in place as he shifts his hips back and thrusts into her again. Five grunts, the heat of his breath fans out across her frigid skin making her shiver. A few more slow, languid strokes before he begins to pick up his pace. Tears bud at the corners of her eyes. Her elbows slide out from under her. The sheets come up to meet her face but his arm is still around her waist, keeping her ass up as he pounds into her so hard that her knees nearly give out.

It’s too much. It’s always too much. She’s all but lost in a haze of pleasure, trying to meet each of his thrusts. It feels good just to be with him, to have him in her and yet, she can’t let go. In the back of her head, she can’t forget that this isn’t real. And the guilt roils in her gut. She suddenly feels sick, her throat tightening until she chokes.

"Fi-Five-ah!” she gasps out.

Her face is pressed into the mattress, fingers grasping at the cotton sheets. The wet slap of flesh against flesh becomes erratic and behind she hears Five groan. His fingers at her waist dig into her flesh. He’s close. Vanya knows it, with each swing of his hips, he grinds into her harder, deeper. Then with a guttural moan, he thrusts one last time and spills into her.

“Sorry,” he gasps. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

His hips are still pressed up against her ass, rocking slowly into her as he rides out his orgasm. It takes a few moments before his breathing evens out, his cock softening within her. He slides out of her gingerly, careful to keep his arm around her waist. Vanya can feel the warm dribble of his cum sliding down her thigh as he gently lowers her to the bed. Sluggishly, she turns over onto her back.

“Lemme finish you,” he mumbles, dropping to his knees and spreading her thighs.

“It’s okay, Five,” she says dazedly. “You’re tired.”

He laughs a little into her skin as he plants kisses up the length of her inner thigh. Five sometimes jokes that she’s a little too polite, especially considering the things they’d done together. It’s cute though, he’d usually say with that too-wide grin of his and she’d blush and try to remember how to breathe. But tonight Five seems unwilling to indulge her impulsive niceties.

It’s still a little uncomfortable for Vanya to let Five eat her out. It’s embarrassing, of course but it’s all a little embarrassing. Sex is a mortifying, uncomfortable ordeal but what isn’t for Vanya? She’s lived her life feeling like an exposed nerve, both acutely vivid and devastatingly deadening. Mostly, it’s the intensity that scares her when he climbs between her thighs with greedy mouth and fingers and extracts from her a feeling that goes beyond pleasure or pain. She can feel it building now as he slides two fingers into her cunt.

He lifts one of her thighs and rests it on his shoulder, the other he pushes back, opening her wider for him. His free arm wraps up under her thigh, looping around and across her hip bone. Sufficiently locking her in place, Five puts his mouth to the top of her pussy. His tongue finds the sensitive spot to the right of her clit, pressing into it, hesitant at first, and when she begins to squirm, he goes harder. He knows her too well, knows that he needs to build up to her clit. The little engorged nub is far too sensitive, so he works around it.

He’s set a languid pace inside her, straying so very close to that erogenous spot. When gets close, brushing just shy of her g spot, it sends a jolt through her and Vanya yelps. She’s so dazed, her body is so warm, unbearably warm but also freezing. The room seems to have gotten colder and it makes every sensation that much sharper. Her nipples are so tight now that it’s almost painful. Five suddenly wraps his lips around her clit and sucks, not hard but it earns him a grunt. Her pleasure crests so suddenly that it leaves her literally breathless. For a second, everything stops, she loses track of herself as she hangs in the balance.

Then, she comes crashing down. Distantly, she feels him inside her, his mouth still on her clit. It takes her a few moments to hear her own squealing, feel her own body scrambling against Five’s grip on her hips. There’s a wet pop and suddenly there’s Five, grinning up at her from between her own thighs. She realizes she’s still breathing as he draws a line of wet, sloppy kisses up her body, to place a sweet peck on the corner of her mouth.

“Sorry,” he says again, then stands.

Vanya dizzily notes that he is still mostly dressed while she lies a complete mess and naked as the day she was born. It somehow always comes to that and Vanya cannot quite make any heads or tails of it. She feels both wound up and completely undone as she watches him undress and toss his clothes on the floor.

“We can go again in a bit,” he maneuvers her body easily, ushering her further on to the bed.

There’s a kind of wired energy to his words but even through hooded, heavy eyes, Vanya can see the sluggishness in him. He climbs in besides her, pulling his comforter over them in one fluid motion. Under the covers, he entangles their bodies, nudging her knees apart and hooking his leg through. He wraps her up in a tight embrace, he’s so much larger than her and she feels completely enveloped, the cold melting away with the heat of his body. Vanya is still too dazed to try to put up any kind of fight. She lets the pleasure of his kisses, peppered erratically over her face, wash over her. His hands wander and grope at her body as he pulls her even closer. Five has a habit of becoming hyper just before he crashes, one last burst of energy before the sudden stop like he’s on a sugar rush.

“I just…I need so-ome shut eye…” he trails off.

His hands still, his mouth is at her hairline, murmuring what sounds like nonsense. As he’s pulled under by exhaustion, Vanya feels herself returning to the surface. She feels both comfortable and uneasy in his arms. Nothing ever feels as good as being with Five but nothing hurts as much either. She’s caught between memorizing this exact moment, locking it away in the deepest, most secret part of her mind and guarding herself against it. It isn’t real. No matter how good it feels, no matter how much she wants it, it isn’t real. She chants this in her head even as she presses her nose into his chest and breathes in deeply. The salt and musky of his damp skin mingles with the brand of mild soap they use at the Academy. She doesn’t know how long she lingers awake, listening to the twin sounds of his heart beating and his slow, even breathing.

None of it can ever be real, she reminds herself. It isn’t her, it isn’t love. It’s the rumor and she can’t ever let herself want more than that.  And yet. She feels the words well up inside her, a truth too big to hide in her throat.

"I missed you,” she whispers hoarsely. “I miss you so much it’s killing me.”

[thanksjro]

Dark Cybertron Chapter 7: Simon Furman and His Lack of a Relationship with the Singular They

The Lost Light is still being attacked by Ammonites, like it has been for the last few issues. Hound’s taken over as acting field commander and is calling all the shots. Chromedome uses his stupid beefy arms to punch things. Trailcutter is screaming. Swerve’s got his My First Blaster™ strapped to the top of his alt, and saves Crosscut.

Crosscut is our toy tie-in character for this issue. He’s a senator, and drafts play scripts. Arguably one of the more interesting tie-in guys, at least in theory. In practice, all he’s doing is forgetting Swerve’s name, which isn’t going to help the guy with his through-the-floor self esteem.

Crosscut points out that Swerve’s communicator is flashing, and while he’s checking his voicemail, all the Ammonites seemingly vanish… at least, until the gang realizes that they’re instead heading for Metroplex.

Inside, it would appear that the Rod Pod Squad aren’t actually dead, though their ride is probably toast. Before everything went to hell, a wall slammed down from the ceiling, protecting everyone from being utterly destroyed. Skids has figured out what all the arrow graffiti is about, earning himself a BOMP from Getaway. Looks like the internal structure of Metroplex has been shifting, and that’s why they got the runaround last issue. Also, Whirl’s gone missing, but we don’t have time to worry about that, because Swerve just called back with some bad news: the admium flakes they saw earlier mean that Metroplex has an alchemical virus.

Don’t you look at me like that, I’m getting to the explanation.

Alchemical viruses turn the metal of the body into admium, a rare, incredibly soft metal that will break down very easily and also kill you. It’s pretty bad to have. Also, contagious. Fellas better get outta there, posthaste.

The Ammonites are also storming Metroplex, so that’s an additional issue. God, it just never stops, does it?

Over in the Dead Universe-

Is

Is that a fortress of evil in the shape of Nova Prime’s head?

Is that a goddamned fortress-

Anyway, the center of Nova Prime’s universe is Kup, who was the guy who got oh-so-dramatically revealed at the end of the last issue. Unfortunately, Orion Pax also considers Kup to be very near and dear to his heart, and the whole “being turned into a space bridge” thing is going to be an issue.

This is the weirdest love triangle I’ve ever seen.

How the hell did Kup even get here? Well, in order to know that, you’ve have to had read Infestation, the bullshit zombie crossover comic miniseries that ran in 2011.

But I’m not going to do that.

Because I don’t want to.

After a bit of showboating, Nova Prime orders Nightbeat to take Team -Imus to their cell.

Over on Cybertron, Shockwave is getting real sick of Galvatron’s shit, but Galvatron is too busy posing dramatically to notice. Waspinator, Metalhawk, and Dreadwing float in the air. I’m not sure what they’re up to, but I’m sure it’s important. Jhiaxus shows up with a gaggle of goons, one of which seems to have forgotten his face in the jar by the door.

Galvatron gets shamed for tearing Megatron in half, since that sort of broke the space bridge in his torso, but he’s too busy being classist to care. Waspinator floats in the background. What are you doing back there, pal?

Shockwave orders Waspinator to carry Megatron to his quarters, but Galvatron’s decided that he’s going to be an asshole about everything today, even when he’s being helpful.

…Okay, Boomer.

Waspinator still ends up hauling Megatron’s ass away, and Shockwave and Jhiaxus have a little chat.

Back in the dead universe, Team -Imus are in their cell, as Nightbeat double-checks the locks or some shit, I dunno. They’re gonna get their sparks ripped out later in the day, so that the space bridge Kup’s got running in his torso finally has enough juice to actually friggin’ work.

Then Rodimus flashes his mystery hand at Nightbeat and makes him fall down. In order for the whole brainwashing thing to work, Nightbeat’s true nature had to be suppressed; however, whenever Rodimus shows off his mystery hand, it makes his brain kickstart back on, messing up the brainwashing.

Well, you know what, Cyclonus? That’s not my fucking fault. Blame Roberts and Barber. I certainly do.

ORION PLEASE.

We finally get a look at what Rodimus’ hand mystery is, and if you read Eugenesis, you might know where this is going. It would seem Nightbeat has not- which is for the best, really, given what happens to him in it- but he’s still a pretty smart cookie and can suss it out through the power of deductive reasoning. Here’s what he’s working with:

After a moment’s deliberation, he asks Rodimus, who he knows to be the captain of a ship, how many folks are riding around in the space yacht. Rodimus tells him 190, and shows off that he’s got his lipgloss on, and it would seem that Nightbeat’s a free man again. He lets everyone out of the cell, and they gear up to go pick up Kup. Orion Pax is confused as to what the hell just happened here, and Rodimus promises to explain why he’s carved a division problem into his palm once they aren’t in immediate danger.

Back on Cybertron, Galvatron and Waspinator are dragging Megatron’s halves towards Shockwave’s quarters, when Bumblebee pops out of nowhere with a gun and a mouth full of swears. He’s here for Megatron, and he’s not taking “no” for an answer. Galvatron thinks that this is super fucking funny, and tosses Megatron like an empty soda can into the wall so he can squash a bug.

It looks pretty grim for ol’ Bumblebee, but suddenly Galvatron realizes he left the oven on that Megatron’s gone missing.

Oh, there he is!

Megatron blasts Galvatron in the torso, then- in a surprisingly polite manner, at least for him- tells Bumblebee to grab his legs so they can get out of here. As the two of them traverse the burned-out husk that is Cybertron, Megatron decides to be a complete bastard, as he smiles at the idea of Starscream suffering. Like, dude, I know he kept you in weird hamster ball jail and spouted soliloquies in your general direction every single day you were there, but folks are dying right now.

Speaking of Starscream, he’s having a moment, as he sits on his knees and stares at the sky in abject horror while the world burns around him. Scoop comes by to yell at him for being a harbinger of death, and generally being a less than stellar leader, and Starscream halfway calls himself a dumpster fire.

Back inside Metroplex, the Rod Pod Squad are fortifying their defenses against the Ammonites, even though they really need to be getting the hell out of there before they get turned into talcum powder through the power of alchemy. Whirl shows back up, the Ammonite hanger-on in his grasp, and we get the skinny on why the hell the Ammonites are involved with this whole debacle anyway.

The answer is Shockwave.

The answer is always Shockwave.

Then the little dude explodes. It’s fine, they do that sometimes.

Before he went kablooey, little dude uttered the phrase, “if the dead are not enough.” We’ll get to what all that’s about later. Right now there are far more important things going on.

LIKE MOTHERFUCKING LADY ROBOTS.

But why is this such a big deal? Why is it that non-male coded robots who aren’t Arcee haven’t been seen up until this point? What’s up with that, huh?

Well, in order to understand IDW’s complicated relationship with gender, we’re going to have to do some digging into the history of Transformers as a franchise.

We’re going to have to talk about Simon Furman.

We're going to have to talk about Prime's Rib.

And we’re going to have to talk about Spotlight: Arcee.

Simon Furman wrote a lot of Transformers. You cannot get away from Simon Furman, because the man is so ingrained in the franchise. He was there for Marvel UK, he was there for the back half of Marvel US, he wrote for several other publication runs of Transformers, he worked on the Earth Wars mobile game-

-and, of course, IDW publishing.

Because Furman is so very well established and known in the industry, he gets the benefit of not being questioned on a lot of the calls he makes.

Which is a problem, because the man is a massive misogynist.

In 1989, Marvel UK #234 came out, containing the story entitled “Prime’s Rib!” in which the Autobots built Arcee in order to appease a group of strawmen feminists. Of course, one female Transformer isn’t enough for them, and they yell at poor Optimus Prime for trying his best. This is the point where Hot Rod is used as a writer avatar to try to smooth things over with the reader, because you see, the Transformers don’t even know what sexual dimorphism and gender identity even is, so of course they wouldn’t have female members of their race! Jazz is used for a breast joke. Arcee acts like a massive, stereotypical bitch the whole time, despite not having been written like that at all in the other issues. It’s a bad comic with hideous ideology leaking out of it, and I'm halfway sorry I read it, so I’ll just give you the essence of this nightmare.

Oh, those big, mean, scary feminists are bullying the robots for living their lives, huh Furman? Life is just so goddamned unfair when a woman exists in your fucking line of sight.

Furman has gone on record saying that he doesn’t see the point in including the concept of gender in a race of non-sexually reproducing robots. He sees them as “genderless.” Which, if that statement existed in a vacuum, I could perhaps see where he’s coming from.

But Simon Furman does not exist in a vacuum. He exists in a world where sexism exists, something that he’s willingly participated in.

Let me back up that little tidbit with a bit of a disclaimer: I’m not in any way an expert on gender. I didn’t study it in school, I’ve not read an obscene amount of pieces on the topic. I’m not even sure about it on a personal level.

Maybe some of y’all have noticed the whole other set of pronouns I slapped into the bio in the last month or so. It doesn’t really matter, 90% of people don’t read the FAQ/About, I know that, and then 95% of those people only read it once, and this has been a relatively new self-revelation.

BUT ANYWAY.

Let’s be… fair about this. 1989 was a while ago, a lot of research on the concept of gender has taken place, maybe he’s ch-

Oh, what’s that?

Misogyny?

Transphobia?

Transmisogyny?

Treating women as an aberration being forced on Transformers as a whole?

And the writing is clunky and overstuffed?

Well, that’s just fucking fantastic, Furman, thanks so much.

This was in 2008. Because Furman established that female Transformers weren’t something natural, but rather made, and forcibly at that, and nobody fucking smacked his little hands away from this terrible idea, AND nobody tried to fix it for years, there was a lack of gender diversity within IDW until 2014, with the release of Dark Cybertron Chapter 7. Because we waited six years to fix this nightmare, things couldn’t be done quite the way that Roberts had been hoping, in that he intended for our female robots to not have the whole… fembot build happening. IDW wanted them immediately clockable, because this was very clearly a problem that needed rectifying.

So, in short: because of boys’ club mentality and a lack of understanding of what gender means or why it’s important for roughly 50% of the world’s population to have representation in media, Nautica and Chromia are here now.

And despite the convoluted road they had to take, I love them very much.

[relto]

why is pointer stuff so weird!!! i realized out that my program wasnt doing what i wanted it to, so i put a few printfs all over the code to see where its going wrong. and it somehow fucks up the input (???) AND get a ridiculous value for the amount of lines (??????) for some input files so once it attempts to output the lines it obviously runs WAY past the right point and theres a memory leak.

[rjhpandapaws]

Secure the Stage

Ch 3: Playing with Fire.

His plan to help Silas as often as possible fell apart almost right out of the gate. It crumbled under the weight of the culmination of things Allen had left unaccounted for, starting with the fact that it was based around his schedule. He worked full time and took night classes. Silas was a full time day student, worked part time at Forever 21, and whatever time wasn’t spent at those places was spent at the theater. Which would have been fine, if they both weren’t busy when Silas had time to spend at the theater. Allen had gotten used to stealing short conversations if his break lined up with one of Silas’s smoke breaks. Allen had learned a few things about Silas in those stolen moments. Silas didn’t typically say much about himself, but when he let too much slip he would stiffen up and curl in on himself like he was trying to hide from it. Allen learned not to ask about personal things; if Silas had something he was comfortable with Allen knowing he would share it. His favorite thing though, was when Silas would talk about the theater. HIs carefully crafted mask would fall away, he would light up and lose himself in the moment. It was something Allen was relatively sure only a few people got to see, so he cherished it. Being around Silas was surprisingly easy. There was just something about him that pulled people in, even when he clearly had one of his masks on. It was his first time around someone who was closed off and distant without being cold or rude about it. The odd thing about it was that everyone around Silas seemed to believe that they knew him well even if they didn’t. Honestly neither did Allen. There was just something in the way Silas was that allowed people to feel that way.

When Allen arrived at the station in the morning he found the side entrance and blocked open with the doorstop. The sight had him a little on edge, the theater wasn’t booked for anything until rehearsal in the afternoon. There wasn’t anything out of place, but as he got closer to the auditorium he could hear singing. It was Silas. Which was also abnormal given that it was eight in the morning on a Monday. He entered the auditorium to find Silas sitting on a blue work tarp in the middle of the stage surrounded by set pieces and buckets of paint Music was playing through the sound system so he found safe to assume Silas had his phone hooked up it. Allen used the side stairs to get to the stage and made his way toward the other brunette. Silas didn’t notice him until his shadow fell across the tarp. He jumped and scrambled to pause the music, smearing wet paint over his jeans in the process. “Hey.” Silas said with a smile, and when he looked up at Allen there was a smear of yellow paint on his cheek, “What’s up?” “Hey.” Allen parroted as he surveyed the barely contained mess of props, set pieces and paint. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class?” “Classes are online for the time being. There was a fire on campus over the weekend so they have to rebuild things.” He gestured to the mess with paint stained hands, “I picked up a couple of extra shifts at work, but the rest of my time is going to be spent here.” Allen had heard about the fire from the news but hadn’t connected it with the college of performing arts that Silas attended, “That sucks. I’m sorry about your school.”

Silas gave a noncommittal shrug, “It’s just a building, and no one was hurt so things should be back to business as usual in a few months.” Allen was honestly a bit surprised at how nonchalant Silas seemed to be about this, “That’s one way to look at it I suppose.” He was trying to keep off the tarp since he had his work shoes on and noticed Silas was barefoot, “So you have a key to the side door then?” “Kinda.” Silas answered vaguely, and for curiosity’s sake Allen motioned for him to continue. “This place is pretty old, and that door in particular is pretty picky. So unless you have the deadbolt turned just the right way it doesn’t lock. It’ll look locked though; one stiff push from the outside and you’re in.” Allen wasn’t gonna say it out loud, but that was pretty impressive. Silas seemed to know this old building pretty well. Which given the amount of time he spent here, shouldn’t have been as surprising as it was, “So you broke in.” “If you want to get technical about it, sure.” Silas objected dismissively, “Though personally I only use that term if I have to use the fire escape or the delivery entrance to get inside.” “Why not just wait for someone to let you in.” That seemed easier in Allen’s opinion. “Because nobody gets here until like eight.” He remarked as he reached for the paint brush again, smearing more wet paint up his arm, “I get here at six. Seven if I take a cab.” “Does the owner know?” He asked. “James? Yeah. Why do you think I know the code to the security system?” He picked up the set piece he had been working on and got back to painting.

Allen realized two things in rabid succession in that moment; he’d forgotten to disarms the security system, and apparently Silas had beat him to it anyway, “Well, I should be getting to work then.” Silas lifted his free hand in an absent wave and didn’t look up as Allen left, “I’ll be here if you get bored.” The same music as before came to life as he got to the doors to the main lobby. He decided he would give the rest of the building a once over before he headed to the surveillance room. Other than finding the concession stand open and a sticky note on the turned on coffee machine that said ‘Help yourself :)’ which hadn’t been there the day before, nothing was wrong. He poured himself some, added his usual amounts of cream and sugar, and headed to the surveillance room. This was the part of his job that he disliked the most because it was so boring. In the afternoon when things were a bit more lively, there would be someone else back here and he would be able to walk around. Silas was the other other person at the theater so there wasn’t much to see. He passed the hours by alternating between scrolling through his phone and checking the cameras. He was scrolling through his phone reading so he jumped slightly when he heard the door creak open. He looked up to find Silas peeking his head in. “I was gonna go and grab some food before everyone else got here this afternoon.” Silas started, and Allen was amused to find some more brightly colored paint on his face and some even streaked through his hair where he had pushed it out of his face. “Did you want anything?” “You might want to clean up a bit first. You’ve got paint all over your face.” Allen glanced at the time and stood with a slight groan, “I’ll take my lunch break and come with you. The person working the afternoon shift should be here soon.”

Silas out a hand to his cheek feeling over the paint that was there. It was dry so when he pulled his hand away nothing was on his fingers and he shrugged, “This stuff is a pain in the ass to get off so I’ll just shower when I get home.” Allen put his phone in his pocket and wrote out a quick note to whoever was coming in after him in case they weren’t back in time, “Alright. What are you in the mood for?” “Chinese.” Silas said as he moved back into the hall. Allen followed after him, catching the door before it closed. “There’s this place down the street; the outside doesn’t look like much; but the sweet and sour pork is to die for.” “I’ll take a word for it.” He said with a laugh. “Are we walking or driving?” “It’s pretty close, so probably walking if you don’t mind.” Silas said as he turned to go through the auditorium. Allen noticed he was still barefoot. “You might want to get some shoes on first though.” He remarked, “If you cut your feet up too much you won’t be able to perform.” “Motherfucker!” Silas shouted as he looked down at his feet. He turned to look at Allen, “One sec okay?” Allen watched him take a running leap onto the stage. He walked toward the right stage wing and came back with a pair of high-top converse. He sat on the edge of the  stage and put sock on and then his shoes, afterwards he hopped of the stage and walked toward Allen. “Alright. I’m ready.” They headed for the side door. Silas let him leave first and then did the trick with the lock before he left as well.

True to Silas’s description, Chinese Gardens didn’t look like much from the outside. Allen wouldn’t have known this was a restaurant if Silas hadn’t pointed it out. Silas got the door for him as they went inside and Allen hesitated a bit when he saw the lunch crowd. “Is takeout okay?” He asked, his lunch break wasn’t long enough to wait out a crowd like this. “Takeout is just fine.” Silas looked around the restaurant from where they stood. “I didn’t realize it was going to be this busy. We can just head to the counter and order and then when its up we’ll be on our way.” Allen stepped up to the counter to order. He chose the sweet and sour lunch combination and paid. Silas did the same and stood beside him as they waited. When they got back to the theater, the first thing Silas did was get out of his shoes and socks, then he joined Allen at the front of the stage to eat. “So this might be dumb to ask,” Allen stated and gestured to Silas using his chopsticks, “But why do you always have your shoes off? Every time I see you around here you’re barefoot.” “I’m just  more comfortable with them off.” He gestured to his feet with a slight smile, “If I’m not in an environment that strictly requires shoes I am gonna be barefoot.” Allen shook his head at that even though he was wearing a fond smile, “What happens if you step on something you shouldn’t? Like glass, or something?” “Pull it out and hope for the best.” Was the reply that he got, and it didn’t help his concerns at all.

They passed the rest of his lunch break with idle conversation. Allen tried asking about the play, but Silas kept tight lipped like usual. The only thing he gave freely was that they were ahead of schedule rehearsal wise. When his lunch break ended he stood to go open the main doors and get back to work since the practice would be starting soon. Any time that he was near the auditorium he would try and listen in on the rehearsal. Today wasn’t going all that great if the number of times he heard an exasperated “let’s take it from the top” come from Silas over the sound system. At the end of his shift he found himself making his way to the auditorium. What he found was Silas sitting outside the left stage wing dogging through his bag like his life depended on it. He was looking for something important it seemed. When he came away with what he was looking for he straightened up and let out a sound of victory. “What were you looking for?” Allen asked as Silas made his way to the edge of the stage and jumped off. “My lighter.” He remarked after he landed, “It was a gift, so I don’t want to lose it.” He made his way to the side door and turned back toward Allen, “I’m going out for a smoke break. Care to join me?” He gave that smile again, the one that disarmed Allen. It lit up Silas’s dark brown eyes and dared Allen to do something he might regret. “I don’t smoke but I wouldn’t mind joining you out there.” “I know you don’t smoke. You turn me down ever time I offer you one.” Silas remarked as they stepped outside.

Silas took a few steps away from him once they got outside. He pulled a black box of cigarettes out of his pants pocket followed by an engraved silver lighter. Allen watched him relax as he breathed in the smoke and then let it out a few moments later as a content sigh. He was curious where Silas had picked up the habit, but wasn’t sure how to ask without coming across like an ass. “So how was rehearsal?” He asked for the sake of making conversation. Silas groaned and took a long drag from the cigarette. he tipped his head back and let the smoke out in an upward plume. If anyone asked him, Allen would deny the fact that he traced the column of Silas’s throat with his eyes. he was pulled back to the conversation when the other brunette started speaking again. “Horrible.” He said with a sigh, “We’re far enough ahead of schedule that it didn’t actually hurt anything. It’s just frustrating you know? But that’s what I get for bragging I guess.” He held the cigarette between his lips and moved to sit on the short stone wall. He continued once he was situated, “I run my mouth to a few friends about how well things are going and then it all falls apart. Though its better that it happened now instead of on opening night I suppose.” Allen leaned back against the wall and rested his elbows on it, “You’ll do fine. I’ve only been here a couple of months, but from the things I’ve heard the plays you’re a part of always seem to do well.” Silas gave him a tight smile. That apparently hadn’t been the right thing to say. He took another drag and breathed out the smoke while he was speaking, “I they plays I’m in  do well. The ones I write and direct tend to fall through.”

“So you’re not in this one then?” He asked. “I am. I took two minor roles that no one auditioned for.” There was another pause as Silas took another puff from his cigarette. “I do a little talking and have about ten minutes of stage time.” “You do a lot here.” Allen remarked, “You do a lot of for this place; acting, writing, directing, building sets, painting them, and probably other things too. Why not just go to a better theater? You’d probably find more recognition that way.” Silas gestured to the side entrance like that would somehow make things more clear. “Don’t get me wrong, when I got into this in high school I was chasing the Broadway pipedream. When I got to college, my freshman year we had to do a project on local theaters and why they fail.” Another puff of smoke as Silas looked like he was getting lost in memoires, “I leaned just how many theaters like this one get shut down because no one cares, and I decided I wanted to keep that from happening.” This was one of those rare moments when Silas had all his walls down and was completely unguarded, and he didn’t seem to notice. “Established theaters are great for exposure which is great; but I want to grow a love of theater in other people. So here I am.” He snuffed out the butt of that cigarette and lit another one. Today must have been pretty rough, he usually stopped at one. He must have had an odd expression on his face when Silas turned to face him again. “What’s with that look?” Silas asked, “Its only my third one today. After this one I’ll head back in and we can clean up a bit.”

“I was just surprised. You normally only have one and then we head back inside.” Allen clarified. Silas just chuckled, “Today’s a two smoke kinda day. Its nice out and I have good company.” “I suppose that’s true.” He conceded. “You look like you want to give me a health lecture.” Silas remarked as he turned on the wall to face him, “My brother is a nursing student so I’ve probably heard it. But if it makes you fee better, I’ll listen.” Allen felt a little guilty, he needed to hide his concern better if he was being this obvious about it. “You sing, and a lot of the things you do rely on your voice.” He felt like he was only making this worse for himself, “I mean, you seem to love doing this and I’d hate to see you have to stop before you’re ready to.” “I am trying to quit.” Silas said conversationally, but his coffee eyes were guarded again. Allen must have said something wrong again. “Trying being the optimal word. I’ve gotten down to having three or four in a day, but I’ve never managed to actually stop. Every time I get to the point that trying to would go well, something else gets fucked up and I start all over again.” “So it’s a stress thing?” Allen asked. “Kinda. That’s what it started out as. I like to say I do it to clear my head or collect my thoughts, which is true, but I also smoke when I’m bored or anxious. Its devolved into an all the time thing. It keeps me busy and that’s why its such a fucking crutch.” He took another deep drag and let it out slowly, the tension that had built during their conversation hid frame as he did, “I’m trying to quit now too. I’m trying to keep under a pack a day now, and then once that’s successful I’ll work my way down from there and hope for the best. The usual.” He waved a hand dismissively. “I can, uh. If you want, I could give you my number. Then if you need a distraction you could call me instead.” He suggested, trying to keep casual about it, “We could talk or if its real bad I could come and hang out.”

Silas’s guard came down a little bit at that, “I’d appreciate that. Thank you Allen.” He held the cigarette between his lips again and checked his pockets for his phone. “Fuck.” He groaned when he came away with nothing, “It’s still in the fucking sound booth.” Allen took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to Silas, “I’ll just send you a text and then you’ll have my number. Problem solved.” Silas nodded and took the offered phone. He had it for a moment and when he handed it back Theater Bitch <3 was his newest contact. Allen couldn’t help the smile that curled as his lips. “Nicknames huh?” He asked and Silas laughed. “Did you expect anything else of me?” Silas quipped back. Allen shook his head, “Not really no.” Silas put a hand over his heart in mock offense, “You are so rude to me. I provide you free entertainment and this is the thanks I get.” Allen laughed and rolled his eyes, “You are so dramatic.” “What part of Theater Bitch didn’t you get?” He joked as he snuffed out the half finished cigarette. he got down off the wall and threw the cigarette in the trash, “Let’s get the stage cleaned up.” Allen was privately glad that Silas hadn’t finished the second cigarette, “Alright. Let’s go.” Silas dusted off his bare feet when they got back inside. His phone was still playing music in the auditorium which reminded him he still had a text to send. He did that while Silas made his way to the stage wing to get the cleaning supplies.

Allen: Guess who Theater Bitch :)

Neither of them were ready for the sudden mash of piano keys  that was apparently Silas’s text tone to come over the speakers. Allen jumped and hear Silas yell “Oh fuck!” from the stage wing. When Silas came out of it he had the broom and dry mop. The tarp, paint, as well as all the things he had been painting looked like they had already been put away. That left them to breakdown the props from rehearsal, then sweep and mop. Allen used the stairs to get to the stage. “What do you need me to do?” He asked as Silas leaned the broom and dry mop against the wall. “Same as last time. We’ll breakdown sets and then I’ll do the rest on my own.” His tone was all business as he fell back into his work oriented mindset. Allen nodded and they worked in relative silence after that because there wasn’t much to say. Silas would get absorbed in his work and start singing along to whatever was playing. Silas would seem to become hyper aware of Allen’s presence and then stop abruptly, only to start again a little while later. The cycle continued until the cleaning was done and he had taken his phone out of the sound booth. The laugh he had let out when he saw the message from him was one of the highlights of Allen’s afternoon. Allen was about to speak when Silas cut him off, “Fuck. My ride is here, I’ve gotta go.” He grabbed his bag, tossed his shoes in it, and leapt off the stage. “I’ll text you later! See you tomorrow Al!” He booked it down the hall and Allen heard the side door slam behind him.

That at least answered one of his questions, Silas didn’t need a ride home today. He sighed and headed for his truck. He didn’t have classes this evening, so it was a go home and relax kind of night. His plans consisted of going home, making dinner, and then either playing his guitar or studying depending on what kind of mood he was in. When he was about halfway home his phone vibrated with a message, it was most likely Silas or one of his hook up apps. He wasn’t in the mood tonight so he hoped it was Silas, though he wouldn’t know until he got back to the house. One of his roommates had parked in his spot so he swore under his breath and parked on the street. His mood improved some when he saw he had a message from Silas rather than a notification from one of his “dating” apps.

Theater Bitch <3: Guess who :) Theater Bitch <3: Sorry for running out on you! I have a friend coming over and I needed to clean my apartment

Allen: You’re good. Have fun!

Theater Bitch <3: Thanks Theater Bitch <3: Will I be seeing you tomorrow?

Allen: Yup

Theater Bitch <3: Cool. Have a good night :)

Allen: You too

He was in a better mood when he got out of his truck and made his way inside. He took his shoes off by the door and made his way up to his room to change out of his uniform. Once he was in more comfortable clothes he grabbed a couple packs of ramen to cook and headed back downstairs.

With something that could be considered dinner made, and his roommates successfully dodged so far, he made his way  back up to his room. He turned on the tv so he would have some background noise while he ate. When he was done he switched from what he was watching over to music so he could study. He had just gotten settled in with his laptop when his phone vibrated again. he wasn’t expecting any messages, but checked it anyway on the off chance that it was something important. He found that Silas had sent a picture. Allen opened it and his eyebrows took a hike toward his hairline. Silas was in a t-shirt and thigh high socks. There was a band logo on the shirt, but Allen wouldn’t be able to say what band it was for because he was a little distracted. Silas had taken the picture in a full length mirror, and the hand that wasn’t holding the phone was lifting the hemline of the shirt in a way that made it clear there was nothing underneath it without giving anything else away. The caption came a few moments later.

Theater Bitch <3: Still coming over? <3

Allen had to blink a few times in an attempt to get his brain back online. He had personally planned to wait a little longer before he approached the topic, but if Silas was ready he wasn’t about to say no. He was working on his reply when Silas started sending messages again.

Theater Bitch <3: I am SO sorry! Theater Bitch <3: That was meant for a different friend! Theater Bitch <3: I just hit the most recent contact Theater Bitch <3: You can keep it if you want though <3 Theater Bitch <3: I wouldn’t be opposed to you staying the night ;) Theater Bitch <3: Just not tonight though

Allen: No problem Allen: I’ll think about it ;) Allen: Have fun and be safe.

Doing this was risky, he liked Silas. It wasn’t the first time he got a little too close to the fire; his last burn was still healing. He found himself saving the picture anyway. Silas didn’t seem to have an issue with casual sex. So long as neither of them got attached things would be fine. Good times didn’t come without some kind of risk. Allen found the thrill of playing with this flame too good to pass up. Burning to ash with him would be worth it.

[emerald-amidst-gold]

WIP Wednesday

Have I got a treat for this Wednesday! That’s right, I have not one, but two WIPs that I wish to share! So, here we go!

Thank you for the tag @noire-pandora!

This first one is from my rewrite for ‘Emerald Eyes Amidst Golden Vows’. Get ready for long ass descriptions because prologues. 

As his indifference towards his own thoughts began to rise, his eyes narrowed to watch the rising sun once more, the fiery orb beginning to bathe the emerald leaves in amber gold--tiny shadows dancing along the surfaces like marionettes. Another tiny snarl escaped his lips as that two toned ballroom of emerald and gold made him think of a far more irritating thing; his eyes. His irises held two definitive colors instead of just simple highlights or flecks. It was as if they didn’t know what color they wished to be, and so they shifted back and forth like liquid in a glass depending on his mood or lighting. 

Sometimes, it would be a pale yellow, the emerald a mere ring around the edges, if firelight hit them just right. Other times, they would be the deepest of jade, the gold within practically nonexistent unless one really searched within darkened depths, and only fools got that close to him. Normally, they just appeared iridescent like small jewels, but he didn’t feel pride in that. It was yet just another thing that people feared about him, and once again, he was accustomed to it. Sometimes he, too, was unnerved by the ebbing of gold within the emerald when he looked into a looking glass, but most times, he felt anger towards them. He felt anger most of the time, but it was the worst when thinking about what he resembled. 

His eyes reminded him of his father’s eyes, those depths having been mossy and dark at all times with pride and ambition. While the hue wasn’t exactly the same, the color of green alone made him sick to his stomach. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been able to look at himself in the mirror without smashing the crystalline glass with a fist. It wasn’t just the eyes that made his rage flare; it was everything about his face. 

The way his cheekbones were angled sharply to make his face appear pointed and predatory. The way his nose was more sharp and prominent rather than sloped like other elves. The way his lips were always down turned in a scowl, upturned in a snarl, or flat with indifference--even a small smirk, which were rare, looked like a sneer. The sight of faded green vallaslin that covered his entire face which were supposed to have hidden those features--the ink mocking him with looping vines and flowered flicks. The more complex design of Sylaise accentuated every abnormal aspect of his face and eyes. It was all disgusting. It was all infuriating. Oh, how he wished it was not just the glass he had shattered into a million fragments, but rather his face, or his father. 

Sadly, he would never obtain the latter as the coward had fled when he had turned twenty years old after five years of abysmal torture that made him appear as he did--hair bleached white, body scarred and mutilated, mind frayed and tormented, and his features deep set with all that agony he hid with expert ease since the vallaslin had not done the job he wished it to do. He had to endure all of that silently because of ignorance and assumptions. Just as he had had to endure for five years silently because of his own fear and decisions.

Five years of bleeding wounds that ached beyond belief because of jagged knives tearing back pale flesh to delve into the muscle underneath--searching and searching and searching for something he had long given up trying to figure out. Five years of nearly puking his internal organs out when the scent of magic or heavy amounts of blood invaded his nostrils--the scars along his body ringed with burn marks from half assed magical healing and lyrium being infused into his veins which indelibly caused an acute sensitivity to the raw essence, which was dangerously foreign to one not possessing magical talent. Five years of nightmares that felt more real than the world around him--their echoes sounding like the screams he had to hold within his lungs lest more magic and tearing of skin be inflicted for his disobedience. It had seemingly ended, but those five years were merely the beginning. For now, he was twenty-four and no better off than when the abuse had started.

***

And this is from a one shot with Estoria called ‘Flowering Magic’. It’s just a little introduction piece to help flesh her out, but here’s a tiny excerpt!

You look like a wilted flower dying for sunlight. Do you want to wither away into dust, or do you want thorns to keep callous hands at bay?

Those words uttered so gruffly, but so caringly had been the moment Estoria knew her nightmare had been over, that she had awakened from the deepest slumber in her young life to blossoming warmth and blinding hope shaded in grey and shaped with rounded ears instead of pointed. She had not just awoken from the fear and abandonment that had gripped her for twelves years. She had not just made a choice from those startling words that a child should never have understood, but yet she had.

She had bloomed--blossomed into a rose, whose petals were soft and velvety in texture to fool those who believed they could pick it for its outward beauty, but whose stem was laden with thorns that would prick those grasping hands without hesitation for their vain intentions. And so, she had reached out to the warm sun with a trembling leaf, and had been met with an incandescent ray that knew how to pluck a rose of thorns from the dying grown it was rooted in.

She had been plucked from the clutches of poverty stricken death. She had been nurtured with stern guidance and a mercenary’s code. She had grown thorns so sharp and graceful that none dared to try and pick the sun’s rose lest they bleed and burn. She had allowed her petals to unfurl unabashedly as a child sprout turned into a womanly bloom of raven hair, bright rose gold eyes, and a strong, graceful figure that many a fool mistook for fragility because of its more delicate aspects. She had found a vase in which to live in, surrounded by the sun and all its clouds. 

Estoria had found a family. A strange one, to be sure, but still a family.

A family that replaced the one she had never known. A family...that had been taken just as quickly as it was given.

***

It would seem my block is mainly with dialogue. I’ve been having trouble writing interactions, so maybe I should listen to some banter lines to help? Hmm..

Tagging: @oxygenforthewicked @lunar-shards @dreadfutures @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold @seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana @another-rogue-trevelyan and anyone else who wishes to jump in! (no pressure and always let me know if the tags are undesired OR if you wished to be tagged! X3)

[extraordinarilyextreme]

finally watched Guardian (2018) and i need to talk

Warning: contains MASSIVE SPOILERS, probably too much music/song analysis, my poor translations from Chinese to English, and some references to the original novel (disclaimer: my novel-reading was mostly jumping around because i have a problem where I’m not fluent enough to read the original Chinese novel and I don’t usually like English translations)

1. the freakin opening theme: We Won’t Be Falling by Chen Xueran... (also I see you Tina Guo on the cello thank you queen)

the amount of chills i get every time an episode starts,,, fantastic! marvelous! the lyrics are very VERY apt to the story of Guardian, esp this drama adaptation

(“We are the one/We will be holding on/For the promise we held for life/For the people we love are leaving” ... “And the story will keep on going”)

1.1. the promise? may i direct you to novel chapter 75? 

Shen Wei: “Sometimes I think if one day you can remember everything, then I will be able to say to you: look, I did it, I did all that I had promised you; not one bit did I miss, not one word did I go back on.”

they promise to keep the peace, to protect both Haixing and Dixing; and in the show, it’s a promise they keep with their lives

2. Zhu Yilong plays THREE characters and is able to differentiate them perfectly with particular microexpressions

-Ye Zun (literally, “Respect the Night”; “Lord/Master of the Night” would be a better title) sets off my fight-or-flight instincts even though i think his name tries a little too hard to be edgy; the way he sneers, the smiles that don’t reach his eyes, also that infamous tongue flick when Zhao Yunlan sees through the act... i think it’s both great and sad that Yunlan could differentiate the twins because, why, Shen Wei would never be so openly flirtatious (and wear a deep-cut shirt like that lol)... the delivery of “Xiao Yunlan” disturbed me so much—wonderful, stellar acting

-Black Cloaked Envoy: does his best to bend the rules where he can for the Dixingren because he’s just so fundamentally GOOD; he’s empathetic despite how stern and strict he seems to be, and how much he claims to enforce the clearly-cut laws... he’s an absolute babie ten thousand years ago (Yunlan, doesn’t it hurt your conscience to flirt with such a babie?)

-Shen Wei: in the novel, his name (both surname and first name) are given to him by Kun Lun’s incarnations—there’s a lot of power in naming something, in naming someone; he’s good-natured and gentle, always polite... he pushes up the glasses [that he doesn’t need] a lot, perhaps because he’s used to pushing up his mask as the Envoy

2.1. i find it very striking that Shen Wei dies without his glasses; he doesn’t die as the Envoy, he doesn’t die as the Professor; he dies as a person, as the person who loves Yunlan the most and has loved Yunlan for ten thousand years

2.2. the other notable moments we see Shen Wei without his glasses are where he apologizes to Yunlan [and Yunlan apologizes at the same time because they’re pining idiots] for not noticing the camera in his office, where he sets aside all his pride as Envoy and Professor and kneels in the rain for the man he loves (lwj kneeling after visiting the Burial Mounds, yea?), and of course after he slices up an orange [cuz food = love] only to find Yunlan asleep and drapes his jacket over the silly silly man... anyway, Yunlan is indeed the only person Shen Wei is comfortable enough to reveal everything to, all defenses and masks (literal and figurative) lowered

2.3. that last instance (ep 26) is when Shen Wei pulls out his necklace and reminisces as he gazes fondly at Yunlan; the song that plays during this is 《乱心曲》or “Chaotic Heart Song”... may I direct you to novel chapter 65 where Yunlan finds all the paintings and pictures his Xiao Wei has kept from the centuries?

“邓林之阴初见昆仑君，惊鸿一瞥，乱我心曲。” which translates to “In the shade of the woods I first saw Kunlun-jun; a glimpse of his grace wrought chaos in my heart’s song”

2.4. but also let’s not forget the [in]famous cut wrist scene of ep 23, where our dear Shen Wei, without glasses, as a person who loves Yunlan—not the aloof Envoy or the well-spoken Professor—is reduced to two words: “Worth it.” Yunlan is worth everything to him; this goes without question, without a second thought. Kun Lun (Yunlan) told him not to regret whatever decisions he’ll make, and Ye Zun scolds and laughs at his brother for giving up his life for a human/Haixingren, but of course Shen Wei doesn’t regret dying to protect Yunlan, dying to protect Haixing. (also, peep the behind-the-scenes where Shen Wei grabs Yunlan’s hand for a moment as he blocks the attack from Ye Zun)

2.5. on this same train of thought, Da Qing brings up a line from ten thousand years ago where Shen Wei claimed he would never kill unless it was for the world... and, well, he kills for Yunlan doesn’t he?

3. Bai Yu plays our charismatic Chief Zhao Yunlan/Kun Lun and hoo boy does he do an excellent job; the found family vibes of the SIU are spectacular and the way he flirts with tries to recruit Professor Shen is endearing and touching

3.1. there’s another piece from the OST called 《一点真心》, translated to “A Little Sincerity” though I would use “A Bit of a Sincere Heart” because it too references the novel

Kun Lun’s confession to Xiao Wei: “我富有天下名山大川，想起来也没什么稀奇的，不过就是一堆烂石头野河水，浑身上下，大概也就只有这几分真心能上秤卖上两斤，你要？拿去。” [I’m rich with famed mountains and endless rivers under heaven, but none of it feels rare when I think about it. It’s all just a pile of broken stones and uncultivated streams. From head to toe, there is probably only this bit of my sincere heart that is worth anything weighed on a scale. You want it? Take it.]

Zhao Yunlan’s confession to Shen Wei: “我别的东西也有，只是你可能大多都看不上，只有这一点真心……你要是不接着，那就算了吧。” [I have other things, only you probably would not think much of them. There’s only this bit of my sincere heart... If you don’t want to catch it, then forget it.)

And Shen Wei’s reply to Yunlan’s confession is of course “我接住了。” [I’ve caught it.]

3.2. the novel is a happy ending because Xiao Guo’s important role actually plays a part (i literally don’t understand why the show couldn’t do that after they built up so many expectations about his good character/merit/inability to be corrupted but ANYWAY)... Shen Wei, Xiao Wei, the little Ghost King has a soul and wow isn’t that just beautiful after everything he did to become worthy/deserving of Kun Lun’s attention and love

4. the Zhang Ruonnan and Wang Yike (death-touch Dixingren) case in ep 3 is an obvious parallel to the “brotherly” relationship of WeiLan... Shen Wei’s line of “Many tragedies were destined from the start” references the show of course but also the paradoxical precognition that marks the drama version of WeiLan; in both of their “first meetings”, one of them was always already in love with the other—Yunlan, as Kun Lun, knew he would have to return to his own time at some point and thus doom this impressionable young Envoy to ten thousand years of waiting and Shen Wei (honestly in a Code Geass Lelouch kinda style) knew he would have to die to defeat his brother

4.1. the importance of “touch” in this case alludes to novel WeiLan, where of course Shen Wei watched over all of Kun Lun’s incarnations but wasn’t allowed to get close to him because hungry ghosts would inevitably devour the essence of the people around them; similarly Yike was terrified of touching Ruonnan all this time... but Ruonnan accepted her (just like how novel Kun Lun lets this intriguing little Ghost King trail after him)

4.2. speaking of Shen Wei’s grand plans and the idea of “knowing”, Yunlan reminds him that “You are not a weapon/blade, you are a person.” and wow once again, only Yunlan can pull the humanity from Shen Wei, who has carefully crafted his disguise and personality to fit what people expect of the Envoy and the Professor... but alas, Shen Wei fulfills his promise by in fact making himself a weapon; he poisons himself to become a bomb that will take down his brother

4.3. as many qualms and complaints as I have with Chinese censorship, much in the case of WangXian, i think i prefer the drama version of WeiLan to the novel version; the plot of the Guardian novel is a lot better in my opinion (with references to mythology and legends, as opposed to, what, aliens?? mutants from X-Men? quirks in My Hero Academia??) and yea the relationship of Kun Lun with Xiao Wei is built up a lot better and makes more sense than the time-travel of Yunlan masquerading as Kun Lun with Shen Wei... but there’s an unadulterated, unconditional kind of love that runs through the drama, whereas the novel had some darker (though probably more realistic) vibes of near-possessiveness and ulterior motives... Kun Lun/Yunlan in the novel can be, well, cruel, which is not necessarily out of character; it’s just seems a little wrong to me that you could threaten your partner in a relationship (if you keep things from me again, i really will turn against you + had i known xyz would happen, i really should have killed you)... plus i’m always a sucker for love without an “i love you”, a love that’s conveyed entirely through actions and gazes

5. Yunlan asks Zhou Weiwei (the mirror case) where her jacket was bought because he “wants to get one for [his] girlfriend” and lo and behold, what similarly-styled and colored coat does our Shen Wei show up in a few episodes later? (also the fact that Shen Wei dies wearing this jade-ish-blue-ish coat)

6. boyfriend jacket during the Moutain-River Awl case... boyfriend jacket!!!! Shen Wei claims he doesn’t need it and well he still wears it anyway because Yunlan’s love is unstoppable

6.1. the way Shen Wei grabs Yunlan’s elbow before running down the hill

6.2. Shen Wei being so freaking fine-tuned to Yunlan’s discomfort/pain as always that he drinks wine for him (and passes out immediately—heroics/bde of yllz! wwx and the alcohol tolerance of our dear lwj)

6.2.1. when Minister Gao brings up Yunlan’s dad and the Chief’s hands tighten... and of course nothing can go by Shen Wei, so he changes the topic of the conversation; also the way he leans forward as if to shield Yunlan

6.2.2. Yunlan is similarly Aware of his boyfriend’s boundaries; cue him politely excusing themselves from the dinner with Vice-Minister Guo when Shen Wei (of all people!) fumbles with his chopsticks

6.2.3. Yunlan also blocks Shen Wei from Minister Gao’s sight (subconsciously?) after that wedding showdown... even though he’s unhappy that Shen Wei has kept the identity of the Envoy from him, he trusts the other man enough to recognize there must be a reason; thus he doesn’t want other people to pry into the possibility that Shen Wei is a Dixingren

6.3. also, also that Shen Wei lets Yunlan have his way and use him as a pillow in the car once again (he also adjusts the actual pillow beneath Yunlan’s head to make it more comfortable)

6.3.1 the other Shen-Wei-is-Yunlan’s-pillow scene is when the professor picks up the poor hurting Chief off the road and in the taxi ride home... apparently this was an improvised scene from Bai Yu who just wanted to mess with Long-ge and our great Zhu Yilong just stayed in character and ran with it

6.3.2. the other notable improvised scene is the cute “Black Cloaked gege~ please be careful~ there’s someone is waiting for you at home~” [sorry that i don’t remember the exact line] but once again our great leading actors just stay perfectly in character

6.4. after Shen Wei wakes up from a night of being drunk (lol) Yunlan has left a note for him “I’ve gone back first, stay in touch. -Zhao” and what’s that on the corner of the note? why it’s a winky face

7. when Yunlan grabs the fake Zhang Danni’s wrist to confirm his suspicions, Shen Wei narrows his eyes... (lol is our Black Cloaked gege jealous)

8. when Yunlan claims he can swallow the painkillers dry, Shen Wei clenches his jaw in his anger at this idiot of a man for not taking better care of himself... you’ll find that a lot of Shen Wei’s anger is directed toward his husband being a self-sacrificial fool

8.1. after Yunlan uses the Hallows again and his nose begins to bleed, Zhu Yilong in all his acting glory has Shen Wei furious to the point that his lips tremble (cue Shen Wei angrily shoving a handkerchief into his husband’s face) [i really want to know if they ever broke character during this scene due to their proximity lol]

8.1.1. Shen Wei all but invades Yunlan’s personal space (he really does stand there between Yunlan’s legs guys) and he’s so careful even though he’s angry as he tries to stop the nosebleed; he’s aware the force might tip Yunlan backwards, so he immediately rests his hands on Yunlan’s thighs/knees to steady him

9. Yunlan has claimed that he doesn’t do things for the sake of gaining anything in return and yet every time he’s wanted things from dear Shen Wei... “take off your mask and smile for me”, “join the SID”... the sexual tension is Unreal during these scenes lol, you can see Shen Wei swallow visibly in anticipation + babie Shen Wei of ten thousand years prior all but chokes on his words when he promises to do ANYTHING Kun Lun wants him to do (honey where is your mind GOING???)

9.1. Bai Yu does have a bruise on his knee after the scene where Yunlan asks Shen Wei for something... dunno if it’s the actor’s bruise or the character’s bruise, but if it’s the character’s bruise—how did he get it? what exactly did WeiLan do that evening lol

9.2. also peep the fact that Yunlan almost always has a lollipop in his mouth when talking to Shen Wei... oral fixation much? (also the whole sequence where he tries to explain how to eat a lollipop to babie Shen Wei, wow the amount of homoerotic tension)

9.3. babie Shen Wei’s ears and cheeks are SO RED when Yunlan snatches the mask off his face

10. Yunlan’s hairstyle changes after Shen Wei joins the SIU (joins his family), much like how a bride would change her hairstyle after marriage in China ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (random note but CQL WangXian does this too when lwj puts his hair down/styled over the front of his shoulders when wwx wakes up 16 years later)

11. the first time we see Shen Wei spit up blood, there’s an echo of “Xiao Wei” faintly and Shen Wei mutters to himself “Xiao Lan” before looking up and saying louder “Zhao Yunlan” (nicknames/pet names/names only your family or lover can call you... this trope is good)

11.1. i also think a lot about how in the novel Kun Lun muses before he dies that it’s a shame he won’t see this Little Beauty [Xiao Wei] grow up to be a Great Beauty 

12. Shen Wei’s funny little eyebrow raise when Yunlan accidentally reveals he broke into the professor’s apartment once ( “riiiiiiiiight i definitely believe you”)

12.1. though the ep 23 scene is angsty, the fact Yunlan says “It’s the middle of the night, were you hungry?” seems to imply their relationship is a lot closer than just neighbors... they’re probably used to sharing an apartment/room at this point :)

13. when Yunlan is hurt, Zhu Hong looks to him but he only has eyes for Shen Wei

13.1. after Yunlan is blinded, Zhu Hong is the one cradling him but he calls for Shen Wei first and reaches for his hand; Shen Wei of course responds immediately “it’s me”

13.1.1. both times after Yunlan gets his eyesight back, the first thing he sees is the person who loves him the most

14. Shen Wei warms up the congee in the morning with his magic after he watches over Yunlan when his stomach pain acts up (domestic use of magic? yes please)

15. the bomb defusing scene in the hospital (video game -> reality case) really is framed like a wedding proposal... also the way that Shen Wei smirks lol he’s so proud of his husband

16. after his Envoy identity is revealed, Shen Wei all but abuses his Black Cloaked Envoy voice to stop his stupid husband from doing stupid things that will hurt himself and every time Yunlan is properly sh00k by it

16.1. we really go from Chief Zhao remarking in the Mountain-River Awl case that he’s used to ordering people around, not receiving orders to married bickering with Shen Wei to then agreeing to everything Shen Wei tells him to do

17. the fact that “Shen Wei, ah, Shen Wei... You are such a good person, how could I bear to let you go?” is an actual line from the censored DRAMA astounds me, nevermind that Shen Wei just made breakfast for his man and Yunlan is basically pouting up at him from the bed

17.1. the way Yunlan’s dad warns him to stay away from Shen Wei and Yunlan responds with something like “he’s sincerely good to me, I want to be with him”... “be with him”???? [inhales deeply] yea this is definitely a “brotherly relationship”

18. Yunlan’s “WOW” after the Envoy kills the monsters in the cave of the Mountain-River Awl case is hilarious and i dont understand how such a noise is physically possible,,, it sounds like a growl?????

18.1. Zhu Yilong was asked to mimic it during an interview (which he did not do and only half-heartedly gave a “wow”) and then Bai Yu did it again

19. also i inevitably got attached to the side ship of Lao Chu and Xiao Guo... they have so much skinship for a censored “brotherly relationship” lmao

the amount of face-touching and hand-holding that they do is unreal... they’re more canon than WeiLan in the drama adaptation methinks 

20. 《时间飞行》or “Flying Across Time” sounds like Yunlan’s reply to Shen Wei’s《只是太在意》or “Just Cared Too Much”

20.1. the lyrics of both these songs really cements this idea that both of WeiLan believe the other to be too good... Kun Lun was a god in the novel, and Xiao Wei was just a soulless little Ghost King... and then we have the incorrigible Chief Zhao pining after the beautiful and kind Professor Shen... i just have a lot of feelings about them becoming better people for each other, that their love really does make each other stronger

21. my favorite two pieces from the OST are Shen Wei’s theme (arranged by Kun Luo) and Kun Lun’s theme (arranged by Chen Xueran)

head’s up: it’s been like four years since i last even glanced at music theory so a lot of this might just make no sense to an actual professional

-Shen Wei: written in 4/4 time, Ab Major, melody is primarily carried by piano + strings; the piano almost sticks exclusively to triplets whereas the strings are in steady whole, quarter, and eighth notes—which creates in interesting impressionistic effect, kind of like hazy smoke or the ripples across the surface of a lake; every single measure uses decrescendo, so the first triplet is always the loudest and the three that follow get progressively softer (mimicking an echo)... the piece ends on the seventh note of the scale, which is usually a pretty awkward place to end and yet it doesn’t feel wrong it all; the piece uses a ritardando in the last three measures, and we simply drift off with that last G... i think it’s a beautifully written piece that perfectly portrays such a complex character as Shen Wei, someone who loved with everything he had, and was just so overwhelmingly good... and then he simply disappears as if the dream has ended. it makes me think of how he guarded over Kun Lun/Zhao Yunlan for thousands of years in the novel, never ever ever daring to meet him... and yet the other man always felt like he was waiting for someone

-Kun Lun: written in 3/4 time, a minor, there’s no real complex shift in the melody although there’s brief modulation into E major (dominant/fifth note); it’s a fairly somber piece, especially when the strings join in... it’s a steady waltz, and it finishes with the scale (second to last major is g, last major is a), like a circle coming back around [like their love story perhaps?]... there’s a finality to it, a completeness, a wholeness, which makes sense in the drama-verse because the moment Yunlan takes up the name of Kun Lun is when his love story with Shen Wei all fits together. the piece feels a little lonely in its minor key and all, a little sad, indeed as if you were standing at the top of a mountain surrounded by clouds and mist... the constant meter also reminds me of like the steady drip of water, the perpetual and inevitable passage of the days and time

-i don’t really understand how because the keys of the two pieces don’t fit together easily, but somehow it doesn’t feel wrong to play the pieces back to back; the melodies of both seem to call upon each other despite the differences in key and time signature, so it actually feels right. a circle without a beginning or an ending, wouldn’t you want your love to be so infinite?

-when yunlan finds shen wei in their bubble outside of time, when shen wei is about to leave him, shen wei is wearing the outfit of their first meeting. and the lyrics go “Across time, I am in the same place”... surely, they will find each other again.